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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9354
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Tue May 23, 2017 9:49 pm 
 

Image

https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/S ... sas/149816
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm

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MawBTS
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Aug 30, 2014 2:16 am
Posts: 733
PostPosted: Wed May 24, 2017 3:26 am 
 

What are the strings attached to? Do they go right through the dude's fingers? If so, ouch.

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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9354
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Fri May 26, 2017 8:33 am 
 

Image

https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/L ... zes/293844

Image

https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/C ... Fde/247097
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm

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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9354
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Fri May 26, 2017 12:20 pm 
 

Image

https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/E ... nity/48435
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm

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Tanuki
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2016 12:36 pm
Posts: 299
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Fri May 26, 2017 12:31 pm 
 

Diamhea wrote:
Image

Lady Godiva's horseriding lessons

Diamhea wrote:
Image

Get lost Derrick, you can't compare with Rick's powers.

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MrMcThrasher II
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Dec 29, 2012 6:01 pm
Posts: 1321
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat May 27, 2017 10:00 pm 
 

Image
I think the main thing bringing it down are the band members forcibly drawn on the cover.
_________________
Murtal wrote:
In flames became MeloDICK Death Metal

TheDefiniteArticle wrote:
Also hopefully they take it as a sign they're not meant to make more albums.

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Cat III
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Apr 21, 2017 11:44 am
Posts: 238
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun May 28, 2017 2:50 am 
 

Sepulchrave wrote:
Spoiler: show
Cat III wrote:
Image

Sadus - Illusions
Anyone think thrash is severely lacking gingerbread men, peacock vortexes and surprised skeletons? You have not been forgotten.


That's a keyhole, not a gingerbread man BTW.

Even worse. Also, OzzyApu is right. The font is fucked. The title is nearly unreadable.

Now for some more atrocities.

Image
Kittie - Until the End
Neat idea, crummy execution.

Image
Marduk - World Funeral
"Paper!" they exclaim in unison.
"Fuck, another tie."

Image
Repugnant - Epitome of Darkness
Despite literally being made of metal, transmission towers are not (death) metal.

Here's an especially egregious one:
Image
Kreator - Pleasure to Kill
Apparently the artwork of Kreator's first four just doesn't cut it these days. Noise records have decided to gussy up their reissues with the blood splatters and bits of metal missing from the originals.
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1st wave is best wave.
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PurpleDoom
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Sep 23, 2011 11:39 pm
Posts: 300
Location: Gazing into the deep
PostPosted: Sun May 28, 2017 3:03 am 
 

I hate it when reissues take a perfectly good cover and add extra text or graphics to it. I don't think I've seen a single example of that in which the artwork was improved in any way.

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Cat III
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Apr 21, 2017 11:44 am
Posts: 238
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun May 28, 2017 6:09 am 
 

I've appreciated some reissues with brand new artwork, though as far as I remember it's always been albums that had crappy art to begin with. This isn't universally true (i.e. the half-assed revision of Razor's Shotgun Justice). I can put up with changing a logo, but draw the line at gaudy additions like that Kreator. A shame considering the righteousness of the original art.
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1st wave is best wave.
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Peyp
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon May 25, 2015 1:16 am
Posts: 161
Location: California, United States
PostPosted: Wed May 31, 2017 12:39 am 
 

I bet someone has already posted this, but I couldn't find it in the recent pages, so now I present to you: Magic Kingdom's The Arrival (spoiler because of size)

Spoiler: show
Image


But the best part is that the CGI girl is also put on the back of the jewel case with the band, as if they actually thought that she'd fit in (spoiler because of size)

Spoiler: show
Image
_________________
I'm currently listening to these albums

droneriot wrote:
tomcat_ha wrote:
i think Fleshgod Apocalypse sold their own frisbees at some time too.

A whole discography of them.


RIP DIAMHEA

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Cthulhu_Fhtagn
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Mar 29, 2013 8:32 pm
Posts: 389
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed May 31, 2017 5:56 pm 
 

Peyp wrote:
I bet someone has already posted this, but I couldn't find it in the recent pages, so now I present to you: Magic Kingdom's The Arrival (spoiler because of size)

Spoiler: show
Image


But the best part is that the CGI girl is also put on the back of the jewel case with the band, as if they actually thought that she'd fit in (spoiler because of size)

Spoiler: show
Image


That band member on the right just screams "I'm from a 90's alt-rock band".
_________________
THEMICRULAH wrote:
IT'S THE SAME INVERTED AS REGULAR?! MY BRAIN IS BROKEN! TOTAL SATAN!

Crick wrote:
The first one is silly because it's got such dainty eyelashes, yet the guy is terrified. NOT THE MASCARA, CTHULHU! ANYTHING BUT THE MASCARA!

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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9354
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Sat Jun 10, 2017 1:50 am 
 

Image



https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/R ... imax/35836
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm

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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9354
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Sat Jun 10, 2017 2:56 am 
 

NSFW:
Spoiler: show
Image


https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/B ... gio/233475
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm

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DecemberSoul
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jan 21, 2010 9:46 am
Posts: 818
Location: Switzerland
PostPosted: Sat Jun 10, 2017 5:53 am 
 

Peyp wrote:
I bet someone has already posted this, but I couldn't find it in the recent pages, so now I present to you: Magic Kingdom's The Arrival (spoiler because of size)


From a physicist's point of view, it's ridiculous how such "fairy wings" appendages are usually drawn so tiny that they could never lift & carry a person who's obviously of regular human size and weight.

This message is not meant to revive the elephant trunk size argument from earlier on, funny as that was.

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aloof
avant-gardener

Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2008 1:18 pm
Posts: 1728
Location: never neverland, palm trees by the sea
PostPosted: Sat Jun 10, 2017 7:14 am 
 

oh man, Railway! I have their first two albums... :/

Image Image Image

"finally back" in 2009, vast advances in graphic design since the 80s/90s, yet the best we could do was a logo over a stock image... :D

Image

https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/R ... ack/350874

///

Image

Queensrÿche: "here is another piece of artwork for "The Warning" back in 1984 that didn't make the cut!!"

source: https://www.facebook.com/QueensrycheOff ... 582713893/
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the devil is very old indeed, we sit with a few stories to tell

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megalowho
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Jan 29, 2006 4:33 am
Posts: 584
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Sun Jun 11, 2017 4:40 pm 
 

Sorry if these are repeats.

I submit the Candlelight version of The Work Which Transforms God. It's not an appalling design, but agh, the pixels! I could've done it better with MS Paint!* I bought the Debemur Morti version just so I wouldn't have to see it. Because I am a total friggin' nerd.

Spoiler: show
Image


I was tempted to get Nachtfalke's First Battles compilation, partly because the original art for Hail Victory Teutonia is pretty juvenile as well. (But I found the albums individually for less.)

Spoiler: show
Image


*Actually, since I'm bored enough, here's an attempt! (Okay, I didn't only use MS Paint. I also used Word, and of course, Google Images for the Vitruvian Man.)

Spoiler: show
Image


Still pretty shitty, but at least it's sort of cleaner.

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aloof
avant-gardener

Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2008 1:18 pm
Posts: 1728
Location: never neverland, palm trees by the sea
PostPosted: Mon Jun 12, 2017 6:49 am 
 

you don't know where to place your 777s and your pentagrams... you would never conjure even a minor demon... :p
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the devil is very old indeed, we sit with a few stories to tell

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Cat III
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Apr 21, 2017 11:44 am
Posts: 238
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Jun 12, 2017 11:47 am 
 

Heretic - Angelcunts and Devilcocks [NSFW]
Spoiler: show
Image

At least it lives up to its name.

Heretic - Black Metal Holocaust
Image
These guys just can't catch a break. It looks like Halloween clip art placed over a crummy polaroid with a cheap fade effect that seems to suggest a spotlight.
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1st wave is best wave.
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DecemberSoul
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jan 21, 2010 9:46 am
Posts: 818
Location: Switzerland
PostPosted: Mon Jun 12, 2017 3:45 pm 
 

Cat III wrote:
Heretic - Black Metal Holocaust
Image
These guys just can't catch a break. It looks like Halloween clip art placed over a crummy polaroid with a cheap fade effect that seems to suggest a spotlight.

"So, does that look evil then?" is what I read from his doubtful face and insecure hand posture.

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Cat III
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Apr 21, 2017 11:44 am
Posts: 238
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Jun 13, 2017 11:47 am 
 

DecemberSoul wrote:
"So, does that look evil then?" is what I read from his doubtful face and insecure hand posture.

I imagine the photographer saying, "Now open your fingers slightly so it looks like you're clutching an invisible object. No, keep the right hand clenched--we want to cover all bases." Also, looks like he's starting to perform an unenthusiastic pelvic thrust.
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1st wave is best wave.
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FunkyBurlin
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Jan 07, 2017 9:08 pm
Posts: 109
Location: Maryland
PostPosted: Wed Jun 14, 2017 1:42 am 
 

Cat III wrote:
DecemberSoul wrote:
"So, does that look evil then?" is what I read from his doubtful face and insecure hand posture.

I imagine the photographer saying, "Now open your fingers slightly so it looks like you're clutching an invisible object. No, keep the right hand clenched--we want to cover all bases." Also, looks like he's starting to perform an unenthusiastic pelvic thrust.
:lol:

Can we also ask the question as to what he thought was cool about using the word 'holocaust'? I mean, is he planning on killing the genre with how good his black metal is? Did he just want to infer thoughts of death and killing and thought that would inspire someone to buy his album? Does he know the 'h' is lower cased?

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demonomania
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Nov 11, 2004 11:44 am
Posts: 401
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Wed Jun 14, 2017 12:24 pm 
 

"uhhh...satan?"
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Your god will fail, and you will be DEAD.

"Everyone welcome back the Hoffman brothers, a new beginning for great guitarists and people."

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Ilwhyan
Metel fraek

Joined: Sat Sep 29, 2007 1:41 pm
Posts: 7854
Location: Lifeless shadows
PostPosted: Wed Jun 14, 2017 5:31 pm 
 

Clearly his life is not truly devoted to the service of Satan.
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"A glimpse of light is all that it takes to illuminate the darkness."
Guitarist/vocalist in Illusions Dead - death/black metal
Vocalist in Gloaming - vile, crawling death/doom metal

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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9354
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Wed Jun 14, 2017 9:38 pm 
 

Image

https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/S ... ight/67726
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm

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rawsewage
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Jan 23, 2009 3:29 pm
Posts: 388
Location: Shamokin, PA
PostPosted: Thu Jun 15, 2017 4:32 pm 
 

Looks like that poor fella got bit by the Sumerian Rat Monkey.

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Lich Coldheart
Stares into the Void

Joined: Tue Jun 11, 2013 12:44 pm
Posts: 960
Location: Frozen dead land where sharp winds blow
PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 9:45 am 
 

Looks like the Australian band Undinism has a magnificent masterwork of a cover for their latest compilation:

Spoiler: show
Image

:puke:
_________________
BastardHead wrote:
I will pay a dollar to have Lich's custom title changed to "Drools into the Toilet Bowl"
Master_Of_Thrash wrote:
I like keeping my sword wet, like a young girl in her prime.

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MorbidEngel
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Nov 01, 2012 9:37 pm
Posts: 889
Location: New Jersey
PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 10:59 am 
 

Oh my god

is that elephantiasis
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last.fm - Feel free to add, just let me know who you are first
R.I.P. Diamhea 1987-2018

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Lich Coldheart
Stares into the Void

Joined: Tue Jun 11, 2013 12:44 pm
Posts: 960
Location: Frozen dead land where sharp winds blow
PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 11:20 am 
 

MorbidEngel wrote:
Oh my god

is that elephantiasis

Most likely. :lol:
That cover does not tempt me at all to check out the music, though. That shit is ugly even by grindcore standards.
_________________
BastardHead wrote:
I will pay a dollar to have Lich's custom title changed to "Drools into the Toilet Bowl"
Master_Of_Thrash wrote:
I like keeping my sword wet, like a young girl in her prime.

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DecemberSoul
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jan 21, 2010 9:46 am
Posts: 818
Location: Switzerland
PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 12:40 pm 
 

Lich Coldheart wrote:
That shit is ugly even by grindcore standards


I'vealways had a liking for their split EP with Gonkulator, even though the latter are clearly my preferred side - insanity > depravity.

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Lich Coldheart
Stares into the Void

Joined: Tue Jun 11, 2013 12:44 pm
Posts: 960
Location: Frozen dead land where sharp winds blow
PostPosted: Mon Jun 19, 2017 1:02 pm 
 

DecemberSoul wrote:
Lich Coldheart wrote:
That shit is ugly even by grindcore standards


I'vealways had a liking for their split EP with Gonkulator, even though the latter are clearly my preferred side - insanity > depravity.

I think we're talking about different bands. :scratch: Either that or the split was erroneously added.
_________________
BastardHead wrote:
I will pay a dollar to have Lich's custom title changed to "Drools into the Toilet Bowl"
Master_Of_Thrash wrote:
I like keeping my sword wet, like a young girl in her prime.

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Buried Dreamer
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Wed Jun 19, 2013 7:11 am
Posts: 14
Location: UK
PostPosted: Wed Jun 21, 2017 12:18 pm 
 

Black Sabbath - Paranoid - What's this guy anyway?

https://www.metal-archives.com/images/4/8/5/485.jpg?3021

Iron Maiden - Number of the Beast - The devil looks like Merman from the He-man and the Masters of the Universe cartoon

https://www.metal-archives.com/images/7/5/75.jpg

Slayer - Show no Mercy - Simply bad

https://www.metal-archives.com/images/2/0/7/207.jpg?0639

Venom - Possessed - Lazily done, just a photograph in black and white and negative

https://www.metal-archives.com/images/8/6/4/864.jpg

Thou Art Lord - Apollyon - Badly designer, looks like someone did it on Paint Brush

https://www.metal-archives.com/images/1/0/3/4/10343.jpg?3147

Children of Bodom - Hatebreeder - Just a dude with a robe

https://www.metal-archives.com/images/5/8/58.jpg?1020

Children of Bodom - Follow the Reaper - The same dude with a robe, in the same photo-shoot

https://www.metal-archives.com/images/6/0/60.jpg?3239

Cavalera Conspiracy - Pandemonium - WTF is this?

https://www.metal-archives.com/images/4/4/9/4/449417.jpg?1131

Destruction - All Hell Breaks Loose - Weird

https://www.metal-archives.com/images/4/3/0/6/4306.jpg?0857

Destruction - The Least Successful Human Cannonball - Bad

https://www.metal-archives.com/images/1/2/6/4/12649.jpg

Pantera - Metal Magic - Seriously.. WTF!? Is that Pink Panther?

https://www.metal-archives.com/images/2/2/5/225.jpg?3713

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aloof
avant-gardener

Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2008 1:18 pm
Posts: 1728
Location: never neverland, palm trees by the sea
PostPosted: Wed Jun 21, 2017 3:39 pm 
 

not sure if you're trolling, Buried Dreamer, but please learn how to embed images. click the "Img" button on the posting page, then place the link inbetween :) you do have a point for thou fart lord tho and oh gosh did the cavalera conspiracy really use that? :D

///

spoiler for size
Spoiler: show
Image

original cover:
Image


https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/W ... oid/385849

listen: https://waverlyliesnorthband.bandcamp.com/
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the devil is very old indeed, we sit with a few stories to tell

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SkullFracturingNightmare
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Nov 14, 2013 7:20 pm
Posts: 1037
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Jun 21, 2017 3:51 pm 
 

I actually like that Cavalera Conspiracy cover if only for the fact that it's so colorful.
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Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.
If God won't have me, then the Devil must!

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aloof
avant-gardener

Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2008 1:18 pm
Posts: 1728
Location: never neverland, palm trees by the sea
PostPosted: Wed Jun 21, 2017 4:11 pm 
 

I feel the same for A Blaze in the Northern Sky :)
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the devil is very old indeed, we sit with a few stories to tell

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Dembo
Dumbo

Joined: Fri Apr 21, 2006 9:58 am
Posts: 1255
Location: Crippling Velocity
PostPosted: Wed Jun 21, 2017 4:14 pm 
 

He's most likely trolling or is very, very young (uneducated), describing the globally super well-known and common Death/grim reaper as "just a dude in a robe".

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Resident_Hazard
Possessed by Starscream's Ghost

Joined: Thu Oct 07, 2004 2:33 pm
Posts: 4028
Location: United States
PostPosted: Thu Jun 22, 2017 9:36 am 
 

Cat III wrote:
Heretic - Angelcunts and Devilcocks [NSFW]
Spoiler: show
Image

At least it lives up to its name.



I feel like the focus on "angelcunts" and "devilcocks" would not lead me to an assumption of anal intercourse. Seems like Angelasses would have been more accurate.
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Warm Fuzzy Cynical comics.
Warm Fuzzy Cynical Facebook page.

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Buried Dreamer
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Wed Jun 19, 2013 7:11 am
Posts: 14
Location: UK
PostPosted: Thu Jun 22, 2017 11:33 am 
 

aloof wrote:
not sure if you're trolling, Buried Dreamer, but please learn how to embed images. click the "Img" button on the posting page, then place the link inbetween :)


I wasn't trolling, I tried the img thing, but some images are too damn large and I thought it could be a nuisance. Next time I'll use the spoiler tag.

Dembo wrote:
He's most likely trolling or is very, very young (uneducated), describing the globally super well-known and common Death/grim reaper as "just a dude in a robe".


Well, he is. :-D

I am not very young, having seen more than a dozen winters, and this grim reaper looks too fat. It makes me think of a lazy Darth Sidious. It doesn't look very menacing anyway. Really, in their last albums artwork the reaper looks way better, check it out. Even the first disc looks great. My rant is that it is too damn easy to take a photograph of a fat dude dressed in some halloween's costume in front of a styrofoam gravestone, add a blue or green mask over it and call it a day.

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Tanuki
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2016 12:36 pm
Posts: 299
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Fri Jun 23, 2017 1:54 pm 
 

Image
Actually kind of disturbing.

https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/G ... tor/336896

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metalistkrieg
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jul 17, 2003 5:02 pm
Posts: 527
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Fri Jun 23, 2017 2:36 pm 
 

That Gator album rules! I downloaded it from a blog years ago and it rocks hard.

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Tanuki
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Dec 09, 2016 12:36 pm
Posts: 299
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Fri Jun 23, 2017 4:04 pm 
 

metalistkrieg wrote:
That Gator album rules! I downloaded it from a blog years ago and it rocks hard.

Funny, I saw it on a blog too! May have been the same one? That's awesome though, I'll have to check it out

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