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aloof
avant-gardener

Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2008 1:18 pm
Posts: 2048
Location: never neverland, palm trees by the sea
PostPosted: Thu Aug 16, 2018 11:47 am 
 

Image

https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/C ... ion/729558

stellar music like this reserves better art! :/ boo, hiss high roller recs :p
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Epicureo
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jul 25, 2017 1:57 pm
Posts: 143
Location: Italy
PostPosted: Thu Aug 16, 2018 1:59 pm 
 

aloof wrote:
Image

https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/C ... ion/729558

stellar music like this reserves better art! :/ boo, hiss high roller recs :p

Simply removing the badly drawn reptilian would greatly improve this cover.

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aloof
avant-gardener

Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2008 1:18 pm
Posts: 2048
Location: never neverland, palm trees by the sea
PostPosted: Thu Aug 16, 2018 7:16 pm 
 

^^I think it's supposed to be a demon or the horned one himself ...as pictured in 1950s hammer films pre-production sketches :D

///

cover my eyes...

NSFW:
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Evoken
Metalhead

Joined: Thu May 13, 2004 11:02 am
Posts: 811
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Aug 18, 2018 7:34 am 
 

I always thought this album cover was hideous. Not a bad band... but I'm shocked this was the best cover they could come up with. It's unoriginal, ugly, lazy, and doesn't do the music justice at all.

The River - Drawing Down the Sun
Spoiler: show
Image

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DecemberSoul
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jan 21, 2010 9:46 am
Posts: 934
Location: Switzerland
PostPosted: Sat Aug 18, 2018 8:01 am 
 

Evoken wrote:
I always thought this album cover was hideous. Not a bad band... but I'm shocked this was the best cover they could come up with. It's unoriginal, ugly, lazy, and doesn't do the music justice at all.

The River - Drawing Down the Sun
Spoiler: show
Image


Moreover, one of the most trite fonts ever. Completely non-metal and a sign of poor imagination. Show me ONE good album using that font on its cover.
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aloof
avant-gardener

Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2008 1:18 pm
Posts: 2048
Location: never neverland, palm trees by the sea
PostPosted: Thu Aug 23, 2018 4:40 pm 
 

Image

to be fair, it's from 2004... but still.

https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/S ... Hell/49936
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Fromage_Qui_Pue
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Feb 05, 2014 7:32 pm
Posts: 248
Location: France
PostPosted: Tue Aug 28, 2018 9:52 pm 
 

Image
https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/Temperance/Krapakalja/11520


I'm pretty sure there was a contest in the 90's/early 2000's between most bands out of Black/Death to have the ugliest cover possible
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MeatWolf
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Nov 19, 2006 10:32 am
Posts: 67
Location: Russia
PostPosted: Wed Aug 29, 2018 3:41 am 
 

(Almost) everything Felipe Machado have ever done belongs to this thread.

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DecemberSoul
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jan 21, 2010 9:46 am
Posts: 934
Location: Switzerland
PostPosted: Wed Aug 29, 2018 5:22 am 
 

And then there's this atrocity:

https://www.metal-archives.com/images/7 ... 0.jpg?2351

Please note that the back cover (which is the opposite view of what you see on/of the front) is even much uglier.
As for the band, nomen est omen.
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ShreddedHuman
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Apr 14, 2007 1:20 pm
Posts: 74
Location: Finland
PostPosted: Wed Aug 29, 2018 11:20 am 
 

I'm speechless.

Spoiler: show
Image

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MorbidEngel
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Nov 01, 2012 9:37 pm
Posts: 950
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Aug 29, 2018 6:25 pm 
 

WE HAVE A WINNER

If it wasn't for the masturbating guy with a Jesus head blatantly pasted on him that would be a great cover
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aloof
avant-gardener

Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2008 1:18 pm
Posts: 2048
Location: never neverland, palm trees by the sea
PostPosted: Wed Oct 17, 2018 6:37 pm 
 

I'm not a big fan of "retro" album covers in general, but this is one of those where everything is wrong:

Image

https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/S ... nes/729367
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jimbies
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jul 21, 2016 2:52 pm
Posts: 1311
Location: Ontario, Canada
PostPosted: Fri Oct 19, 2018 6:34 pm 
 

Guardians of Time - Edge Of Tomorrow
Image

WOW.

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PvtNinjer
Veteran

Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 12:45 am
Posts: 3960
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Fri Oct 19, 2018 8:15 pm 
 

Evoken wrote:
I always thought this album cover was hideous. Not a bad band... but I'm shocked this was the best cover they could come up with. It's unoriginal, ugly, lazy, and doesn't do the music justice at all.

The River - Drawing Down the Sun
Spoiler: show
Image



To each their own... I love this cover!

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forestcorpse
Veteran

Joined: Thu Jul 16, 2009 2:06 pm
Posts: 3859
Location: Norway
PostPosted: Sat Oct 20, 2018 10:42 am 
 

Image

Image

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Cat III
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Apr 21, 2017 11:44 am
Posts: 286
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Nov 07, 2018 12:33 am 
 

Don't know what they were going for, but it sucks.
Image
Slightly better, but still an eyesore. Guy in front left does get a laugh.
Image
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aloof
avant-gardener

Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2008 1:18 pm
Posts: 2048
Location: never neverland, palm trees by the sea
PostPosted: Fri Nov 09, 2018 3:53 pm 
 

^^you wouldn't be laughing if you had your head torn in half by a blood red, angry demon :p

///

this came out in 2018:

Image

as an "improvement" on

Image

I know, right? :D

https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/M ... /II/135178

///

saw this today due to some dude posting a tribute album link in another thread:

(spoiler for NSFW in an abstract kinda way...)
Spoiler: show
Image


I mean, srsly ppl! truly, aptly titled album...

https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/T ... mal/736092
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299796kms
Metal newbie

Joined: Thu Mar 05, 2009 5:28 pm
Posts: 389
PostPosted: Sat Nov 10, 2018 8:40 am 
 

Took me a while before I saw it. Not half bad actually
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Secret Glory
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Sat Oct 15, 2016 12:47 pm
Posts: 18
PostPosted: Mon Nov 12, 2018 8:32 pm 
 

^That cover doesn't belong in here. Santiago Caruso is an incredible illustrator.

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Lord_Jotun
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Sep 13, 2003 5:02 pm
Posts: 2330
Location: Italy
PostPosted: Sat Nov 17, 2018 10:17 am 
 

Stumbled upon this little gem today:

Spoiler: show
Image
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Azmodes
Ultranaut

Joined: Fri Nov 02, 2007 10:44 am
Posts: 10003
Location: Gradec, Austria
PostPosted: Sat Dec 01, 2018 10:37 am 
 

Spoiler: show
Image
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metalistkrieg
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jul 17, 2003 5:02 pm
Posts: 486
Location: United States of America
PostPosted: Wed Dec 19, 2018 4:48 pm 
 

Definitely NSFW

Spoiler: show
Image


https://www.metal-archives.com/bands/Ba ... 3540272106

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DecemberSoul
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jan 21, 2010 9:46 am
Posts: 934
Location: Switzerland
PostPosted: Sun Jan 20, 2019 8:30 am 
 

Hooded guy on the right: "So the recipe says to add one giant strawberry to the cauldron..."
Image
Draconian cooking methods indeed. Oh, and syzygial miscreancies flying about.
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true_death
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Sep 26, 2013 6:47 pm
Posts: 1842
PostPosted: Sun Jan 20, 2019 12:05 pm 
 

Image
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true_death
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Sep 26, 2013 6:47 pm
Posts: 1842
PostPosted: Sun Jan 20, 2019 12:12 pm 
 

This atrocity is actually a different band called Dark (the Czech band that released Sex 'n' Death, for my fellow OSDM afficionados). I was actually looking for this band when I found the album in that last post. No idea what it's supposed to be but it seems fitting for this thread.

P.S. while I imagine this is just a scanned pic of someone's signed copy, I really want to believe that signature is actually printed on the album cover. Would be fucking hilarious if so :lol:.

Image
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Thy Shrine
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Nov 11, 2016 11:37 pm
Posts: 234
Location: Golgotha
PostPosted: Sun Jan 20, 2019 10:53 pm 
 

DecemberSoul wrote:
Hooded guy on the right: "So the recipe says to add one giant strawberry to the cauldron..."
Image
Draconian cooking methods indeed. Oh, and syzygial miscreancies flying about.



Definitely does NOT belong here, that cover is fucking awesome.
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DecemberSoul
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jan 21, 2010 9:46 am
Posts: 934
Location: Switzerland
PostPosted: Mon Jan 21, 2019 5:45 pm 
 

Thy Shrine wrote:
Definitely does NOT belong here, that cover is fucking awesome.


It's not bad (and its drawing style clearly reminds of Purtenance's debut); I mainly mentioned it as it tickles my funnybone. For colorful covers by US-American black/death groups, this is the way to go though:

Image
Image

And what an ever fresh slab of cool metal it is...should be on vinyl too.
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ChristBeheader666
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Tue Dec 25, 2018 11:51 pm
Posts: 6
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Jan 22, 2019 3:33 am 
 

Azmodes wrote:
Spoiler: show
Image


"Deciphering The Juggalos"


"Call of the Juggalos"

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Vigintiseptem
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Sep 23, 2014 12:23 pm
Posts: 230
Location: Finland
PostPosted: Tue Jan 22, 2019 7:13 am 
 

Secret Glory wrote:
^That cover doesn't belong in here. Santiago Caruso is an incredible illustrator.

The artwork is technically excellent but the concept is abysmal. Yeah yeah, "cathedral of flesh" or something like that, but if the description of the work requires the phrase "and the cathedral roof is like tits", it is bad.

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Evoken
Metalhead

Joined: Thu May 13, 2004 11:02 am
Posts: 811
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Jan 22, 2019 1:48 pm 
 

Thy Shrine wrote:
DecemberSoul wrote:
Hooded guy on the right: "So the recipe says to add one giant strawberry to the cauldron..."
Image
Draconian cooking methods indeed. Oh, and syzygial miscreancies flying about.



Definitely does NOT belong here, that cover is fucking awesome.


It's not the worst cover ever, but I'm not sure I'd agree it's awesome. It's definitely a cool and "metal" premise for the cover, and it's got a certain low-quality charm to it, but c'mon... it almost looks like it was colored in with crayons.

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Resident_Hazard
Possessed by Starscream's Ghost

Joined: Thu Oct 07, 2004 2:33 pm
Posts: 2737
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Jan 22, 2019 4:56 pm 
 

LycanthropeMoon wrote:
Image
Another good album with a shit cover. I also read this as "Backdoor Miracle" half the time.


It looks like she's shitting a demon horn, so I'd call that a backdoor miracle.
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Oddeye
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Jun 28, 2009 12:24 pm
Posts: 2185
Location: Sweden
PostPosted: Wed Jan 23, 2019 3:51 am 
 

DecemberSoul wrote:
Hooded guy on the right: "So the recipe says to add one giant strawberry to the cauldron..."
Image
Draconian cooking methods indeed. Oh, and syzygial miscreancies flying about.


Man I think this cover is great!


metalistkrieg wrote:


Definately horrible... not as bad as this though (by the same band). NSFW!

Spoiler: show
Image

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schizoid
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Jul 19, 2004 8:35 am
Posts: 1463
Location: New Zealand
PostPosted: Wed Jan 23, 2019 7:38 am 
 

Oddeye wrote:


metalistkrieg wrote:


Definately horrible... not as bad as this though (by the same band). NSFW!

Spoiler: show
Image


You prefer dick to vag?

Decided to check out the band. Not bad!
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Thy Shrine
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Nov 11, 2016 11:37 pm
Posts: 234
Location: Golgotha
PostPosted: Wed Jan 23, 2019 7:41 am 
 

ShreddedHuman wrote:
I'm speechless.

Spoiler: show
Image



As someone who loves completely dumb ass retarded memes, this would make a good meme.
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DecemberSoul
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jan 21, 2010 9:46 am
Posts: 934
Location: Switzerland
PostPosted: Sat Jan 26, 2019 6:40 am 
 

To this day, I still don't manage to view this as an album cover:

Image

Was the person responsible for this ever seen alive thereafter?
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Tornado
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Jun 03, 2009 3:21 pm
Posts: 482
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Sat Jan 26, 2019 7:18 am 
 

DecemberSoul wrote:
To this day, I still don't manage to view this as an album cover:

Image

Was the person responsible for this ever seen alive thereafter?


Entombed's very own Nicke & Alex had a big hand in doing that 'cover' I do believe. Much like they did with the dreadfully dated Wolverine Blues 'horror pic with a photoshopped effect over the top' album cover.

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Endarkening
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Nov 10, 2018 11:51 pm
Posts: 33
PostPosted: Sat Jan 26, 2019 8:48 pm 
 

DecemberSoul wrote:
To this day, I still don't manage to view this as an album cover:

Image

Was the person responsible for this ever seen alive thereafter?


For years I owned this album and assumed it was some sort of promo copy, due to the cover "art".

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schizoid
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Jul 19, 2004 8:35 am
Posts: 1463
Location: New Zealand
PostPosted: Sat Jan 26, 2019 10:21 pm 
 

Endarkening wrote:

For years I owned this album and assumed it was some sort of promo copy, due to the cover "art".


I always had this one...whoopee

Image
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DecemberSoul
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jan 21, 2010 9:46 am
Posts: 934
Location: Switzerland
PostPosted: Sun Jan 27, 2019 4:42 am 
 

schizoid wrote:
Endarkening wrote:

For years I owned this album and assumed it was some sort of promo copy, due to the cover "art".


I always had this one...whoopee

Image


Bizarre enough, this skater logo-type cover is an improvement over the one glorifiying Hollywood culture.
Come to think of it, Rodney Mullen would have exuded a decidedly cooler aura that some nerdy Marvel heroine, too.
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aloof
avant-gardener

Joined: Sun Dec 14, 2008 1:18 pm
Posts: 2048
Location: never neverland, palm trees by the sea
PostPosted: Tue Jan 29, 2019 7:40 am 
 

spoilers for size, slightly sexual theme (the 1st only) and bad taste...

Spoiler: show
Image


https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/T ... ses/739579

///

Spoiler: show
Image Image


https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/C ... ion/755004
https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/C ... ies/755003
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