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HeavenDuff
Metal freak

Joined: Sun Mar 07, 2010 10:35 pm
Posts: 5164
Location: Montréal
PostPosted: Fri Mar 05, 2021 4:05 pm 
 

darkeningday wrote:
Occam's Razor suggests that Alexi didn't sign the divorce papers out of general apathy rather than "like totally wanting to stay married to Kim despite, yanno, choosing to live on separate sides of the world and dating other people." Alexi lived in the moment.

To be honest, both of these ex-spouses sound like vultures fighting over his opulent corpse. I hope Alexi's whole estate goes to a mallcore rehabilitation facility. Or, like, an actual rehab facility.


The point of Kimberly seems to be that Alexi chose not to divorce her rather than Kimberly forcing him to stay married to her by refusing to sign the divorce papers, like Alexi's girlfriend said. Since the marriage laws in Finland actually allows people to get divorced without the approval of their spouse, it seems to mean that Alexi's girlfriend is spreading lies about the matter.

Gunslinger21 wrote:
Full respect to Alexi and everything he accomplished, but man, he must have really loved getting trashed to eventually die from it.


Alcoholism is an addiction. It's a psychological disorder.

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BleedingMoon
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Jul 29, 2017 4:37 pm
Posts: 104
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Fri Mar 05, 2021 6:52 pm 
 

Hate to say that his cause of death comes as absolutely 0% surprise. Would be nice if the women could stop making all this drama public though. These are things that should be sorted among oneselves, not with statements and gofundme pages.

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HeavenDuff
Metal freak

Joined: Sun Mar 07, 2010 10:35 pm
Posts: 5164
Location: Montréal
PostPosted: Fri Mar 05, 2021 10:24 pm 
 

BleedingMoon wrote:
Hate to say that his cause of death comes as absolutely 0% surprise. Would be nice if the women could stop making all this drama public though. These are things that should be sorted among oneselves, not with statements and gofundme pages.


If you're Kimberly Goss and you believe a man you love/who is very important to you died because of someone who leeched on him and enabled his addiction until it finally killed him, I assume it must be hard to just stay idly by and say nothing while a shit show like this is going on.

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Terri23
Veteran

Joined: Thu Sep 30, 2010 3:53 am
Posts: 3177
PostPosted: Sat Mar 06, 2021 9:06 am 
 

HeavenDuff wrote:
darkeningday wrote:
Occam's Razor suggests that Alexi didn't sign the divorce papers out of general apathy rather than "like totally wanting to stay married to Kim despite, yanno, choosing to live on separate sides of the world and dating other people." Alexi lived in the moment.

To be honest, both of these ex-spouses sound like vultures fighting over his opulent corpse. I hope Alexi's whole estate goes to a mallcore rehabilitation facility. Or, like, an actual rehab facility.


The point of Kimberly seems to be that Alexi chose not to divorce her rather than Kimberly forcing him to stay married to her by refusing to sign the divorce papers, like Alexi's girlfriend said. Since the marriage laws in Finland actually allows people to get divorced without the approval of their spouse, it seems to mean that Alexi's girlfriend is spreading lies about the matter.


This was my take also on Kim's statement.
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interstellar_medium
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Mar 12, 2020 9:41 am
Posts: 926
Location: Russia
PostPosted: Sat Mar 06, 2021 12:07 pm 
 

Tonmi Lillman (played drums in Sinergy 1999-2002, and loads of other bands) died from basically the same stuff in 2012, when he wasn't yet forty. Kim Goss was very happy when he was no longer in the band and called him a huge problem.
Looks like that example didn't teach anyone anything.

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cweed
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Apr 12, 2004 7:48 pm
Posts: 541
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat Mar 06, 2021 1:22 pm 
 

interstellar_medium wrote:
Tonmi Lillman (played drums in Sinergy 1999-2002, and loads of other bands) died from basically the same stuff in 2012, when he wasn't yet forty. Kim Goss was very happy when he was no longer in the band and called him a huge problem.
Looks like that example didn't teach anyone anything.


Not saying you're incorrect, but do you have a source for this (regarding Lillman's cause of death)? His page on here says "Lillman died on 14 February 2012, the cause of his death is still unknown."
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interstellar_medium
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Mar 12, 2020 9:41 am
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Location: Russia
PostPosted: Sat Mar 06, 2021 3:20 pm 
 

cweed wrote:
interstellar_medium wrote:
Tonmi Lillman (played drums in Sinergy 1999-2002, and loads of other bands) died from basically the same stuff in 2012, when he wasn't yet forty. Kim Goss was very happy when he was no longer in the band and called him a huge problem.
Looks like that example didn't teach anyone anything.


Not saying you're incorrect, but do you have a source for this (regarding Lillman's cause of death)? His page on here says "Lillman died on 14 February 2012, the cause of his death is still unknown."


Well, a 2017 interview with Pasi "Ruoja" Koskinen is as official as it gets, but they were close friends, so no reason not to trust him.

Quote:
He died from drugs and alcohol – too much shit.

https://obscuro.cz/interview-ajattara/

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Space_alligator
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Jan 05, 2009 3:43 am
Posts: 714
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Sun Mar 07, 2021 7:29 am 
 

How much does one drink, to actually get to the point of death?
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Ina_Dingir_Xul
Metalhead

Joined: Fri May 15, 2009 8:44 am
Posts: 444
Location: Singapore
PostPosted: Sun Mar 07, 2021 8:16 am 
 

Space_alligator wrote:
How much does one drink, to actually get to the point of death?


It's accumulated damage over a long period of heavy drinking. 20 years of 20+ standard drinks daily (equivalent to a 700 mL bottle of whiskey at about 40% alcohol by volume) could certainly do it. Progressive liver injury resulting in cirrhosis (without accounting for the chronic pancreatic insufficiency which can either result directly from the alcohol or from recurrent bouts of acute pancreatitis) will eventually lead to death. The actual cause of death itself is highly variable, but infections, severe bleeding and renal failure are the main culprits.

On the other hand, a single large binge can, in itself, also lead to death, but that is a different scenario. That also depends on things like the person's alcohol tolerance.

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Frank Booth
Can Bench 450

Joined: Fri Aug 31, 2012 9:29 pm
Posts: 1518
Location: United States
PostPosted: Sun Mar 07, 2021 12:56 pm 
 

Also depends on what else you're doing. Other drugs in addition to alcohol (which he appears to have been doing) are bad enough, and in addition to those, Alexi is definitely the kind of dude who I could have seen snorting lines of blow when it's an hour before he has to hit the stage and he's so drunk he can barely even walk, and that also doesn't do great things for the body. Getting fucked up every night and going as hard as possible every night on the road until you collapse in your bunk for over a month on end, then coming back home and not changing your habits very much for three weeks before you go right back out to do it all over again is not a lifestyle conducive to long-term survival, and he had lived like that since his late teens. I guarantee you that he was already falling apart in the first half of his thirties.

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SilverSpring2018
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Feb 18, 2020 11:43 pm
Posts: 113
PostPosted: Sun Mar 07, 2021 1:44 pm 
 

Kind of amazing to think of all the touring he did over 20+ years. That would be rough for most anyone. Especially when you're putting your body through what he must have been putting his through.

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AddWittyUsername
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Oct 07, 2013 8:40 pm
Posts: 225
Location: Netherlands
PostPosted: Sun Mar 07, 2021 2:07 pm 
 

Frank Booth wrote:
Also depends on what else you're doing. Other drugs in addition to alcohol (which he appears to have been doing) are bad enough, and in addition to those, Alexi is definitely the kind of dude who I could have seen snorting lines of blow when it's an hour before he has to hit the stage and he's so drunk he can barely even walk, and that also doesn't do great things for the body. Getting fucked up every night and going as hard as possible every night on the road until you collapse in your bunk for over a month on end, then coming back home and not changing your habits very much for three weeks before you go right back out to do it all over again is not a lifestyle conducive to long-term survival, and he had lived like that since his late teens. I guarantee you that he was already falling apart in the first half of his thirties.

Even beyond recreational drugs, just plain old over-the-counter painkillers and alcohol are an *incredibly* toxic combination for your organs, too, to the point that some of them shouldn't be taken within 12h+ of one another. Very easy to end up rapidly worsening the situation that way, too.

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~Guest 2944
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Aug 22, 2003 4:17 pm
Posts: 794
PostPosted: Mon Mar 08, 2021 9:40 am 
 

His official cause of death was released on Blabbermouth

Quote:
alcohol-induced degeneration of the liver and pancreas connective tissue." Furthermore, Laiho had a cocktail of painkillers, opioids and insomnia medication in his system.


https://www.blabbermouth.net/news/ex-children-of-bodom-frontman-alexi-laiho-official-cause-of-death-revealed/

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kluseba
Making Metal Archives Reviews Great Again!

Joined: Tue Sep 21, 2010 2:36 am
Posts: 897
PostPosted: Mon Mar 08, 2021 9:45 am 
 

It's nobody's business how and why he died. That kind of information should be kept secret. If he had wanted to share this information with the rest of the world or start some charity fundraising, he would have done or organized it while he was still alive.
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~Guest 2944
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Aug 22, 2003 4:17 pm
Posts: 794
PostPosted: Mon Mar 08, 2021 12:03 pm 
 

kluseba wrote:
It's nobody's business how and why he died. That kind of information should be kept secret. If he had wanted to share this information with the rest of the world or start some charity fundraising, he would have done or organized it while he was still alive.
I believe the reason the cause of death was released, at least according to the article was so that his death may help others. I believe the article said his former wife made this decision, to show that those in need of help should seek treatment. There are people that care about you and there are options for those suffering from addictions. You are not alone and if you do not seek help, unfortunately it may kill you leaving loves ones devastated.

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Lord Diabolus
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Jul 26, 2019 6:22 am
Posts: 31
Location: Finland
PostPosted: Mon Mar 08, 2021 12:45 pm 
 

Ain't no rest for the wicked... Laiho's remains still remain unburied.

Finnish newspaper Iltalehti today, google translate (with some minor corrections myself)
https://www.iltalehti.fi/viihdeuutiset/ ... 3e9a6c48fa

Quote:
Alexi Laiho cannot be buried - a big quarrel broke out between the relatives and the widow
Today at 12:49

Children of Bodom guitarist Alexi Laiho, who died in December, has not been able to rest in the grave.
Relatives are now arguing with the widow over the rights to the urn.

Children of Bodom guitarist and frontman Alexi Laiho died in Helsinki on December 29 at the age of 41. His funeral was held on January 28 at Malmi Chapel, after which he was cremated on site.

Contrary to popular belief, Alexi Laiho has not yet been able to rest in the grave.

Iltalehti interviewed guitar legend's sister Anna Laiho . According to him, widow Kimberly Goss wants to prevent Alexi from burial despite the grieving family’s wishes and appeals.

- The grief work has not yet begun. Only when these things become clear can our grief work begin. It has been really difficult for the family, says Anna Laiho to Iltalehti.

The family wanted to hold Alexi Laiho’s funeral in January only in the presence of family and closest friends.

The reason was both the prevailing corona situation and the guitarist's desire to respect his privacy during his lifetime.

The family tried to communicate the matter beautifully to Kimberly Goss, who is officially Laiho’s widow. Although the couple ended more than 10 years ago and Laiho already had a new spouse, no formal divorce application was ever filed. That’s why Goss is still legally Laiho’s spouse.

- We haven't been in contact with Kimberly in 20 years, so we wouldn't have wanted him on the scene. When he was dating Alex, the relationship was very contentious. The family was relieved when it ran out, Anna Laiho explains.

According to the sister, the widow did not agree to miss the funeral, but initially demanded two separate funerals.

- We managed to hold a beautiful blessing in spite of everything. The urn date had already been agreed. Then I got in touch with the funeral home that Goss’s lawyer had been in contact with them and blocked the urn.

Alexi Laiho's urn is currently waiting at the Helsinki Parish Association's premises in Malmi. A beautiful graveyard and a large tombstone have already been reserved for the guitarist from Malmi Cemetery, at the foot of which even fans could leave their greetings.

- Alexi is now waiting to be buried there. The urn will not be handed over to anyone until we reach an agreement on who will bury Alex. This has been really heavy for parents. They would like their dead son to be buried honorably, but Kimberly blocks it. He wants to lower the urn himself and arrange an event with the urn.

Anna Laiho is the guitarist's only sister. He describes the situation as unsustainable for the family.

- We have thought that there is certainly no other option here than to take the matter to the district court. We will probably sue, even if we don’t, because it will be a cost for everyone and the parents would not be able to handle the litigation at all. We would not want to do that, but it seems that an agreement cannot be reached in any other way, says Anna Laiho.

Alex's will
If the deceased has no heirs, the widow will inherit the property of the deceased spouse, unless the deceased has bequeathed it to someone else, says the oikeus.fi website .

Alexi Laiho had no children.

According to her sister, the Children of Bodom guitarist tried in her last months to get Kimberly Goss to sign a marriage contract.

Alexi Laiho wanted Goss to relinquish her right to marry in the marriage contract.

- Kimberly never agreed to put her name under this marriage contract. The conversation lasted until Aleksi died. I have the impression that, especially in recent times Aleksi activated in terms of that marriage contract, says sister.

According to her sister, Alexi dreamed towards the end of her life that she would be able to move permanently to her Australian husband Kelli Wright-Laiho .

Instead, he died at home in Helsinki.

Alexi Laiho made a will before his death.

According to it, the entire property of Alexi Laiho goes to the parents. Kimberly Goss, who otherwise inherited Alex as a widow, was completely excluded from the will.

- Kimberly is entitled to a flat rate, but once it is paid, the entire property goes to the parents. Kimberly has refused to sign the service of the will, although she has publicly stated that she wants to work with the family.

Iltalehti has seen a will made in Helsinki.

The sister says she took care of the estate and funeral arrangements with the parents' power of attorney. Iltalehti has seen the power of attorney. By decision of the Helsinki District Court, Kimberly had previously acquired an external liquidator.

According to Alexi Laiho's sister, the family asked Goss to keep the cause of death as his own information. Iltalehti has seen the exchange of messages on this issue.

- The publication of the cause of death was not made in agreement with our family. Kimberly published details of Alex's death against the will of the family. She was well aware that we did not want this publication, Anna Laiho says.

- Kimberly, as a legal wife, has the right to demand that information. He demanded that information through his lawyer. As a family, we expressed the hope that this information would not be published, but he nevertheless went to do so.

According to her sister, Alexi Laiho protected her privacy while living. The family believes the guitarist would not have wanted to disclose the details of his death.

- Aleksi wanted to keep his own health information out of the public while he was alive. Based on that, we family members also concluded that he would not have wanted this information to be made public. Unfortunately, our opinion on this matter was not listened to. The damage has occurred. It’s a shame because we would have liked Alex to be remembered for his musical merits, not the weaknesses he had.

Iltalehti did not reach Kimberly Goss to comment on the issues raised in the article.


Sorry for the long post... still was quite relevant to the speculation of this thread.


Last edited by Lord Diabolus on Mon Mar 08, 2021 12:55 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Morrigan
Crone of War

Joined: Sat Aug 10, 2002 7:27 am
Posts: 10528
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Mar 08, 2021 12:53 pm 
 

wizard_of_bore wrote:
I believe the reason the cause of death was released, at least according to the article was so that his death may help others. I believe the article said his former wife made this decision, to show that those in need of help should seek treatment. There are people that care about you and there are options for those suffering from addictions. You are not alone and if you do not seek help, unfortunately it may kill you leaving loves ones devastated.

Yup. If the family/closed ones don't want to divulge the cause of death, that's fine, but if they do, it's not on others to wag their fingers at them. Making causes of death some sort of taboo, when a lot of people die from the same causes precisely because the taboo means they're less likely to get help, literally helps no one.
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Lord Diabolus
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Jul 26, 2019 6:22 am
Posts: 31
Location: Finland
PostPosted: Mon Mar 08, 2021 12:57 pm 
 

Morrigan wrote:
wizard_of_bore wrote:
I believe the reason the cause of death was released, at least according to the article was so that his death may help others. I believe the article said his former wife made this decision, to show that those in need of help should seek treatment. There are people that care about you and there are options for those suffering from addictions. You are not alone and if you do not seek help, unfortunately it may kill you leaving loves ones devastated.

Yup. If the family/closed ones don't want to divulge the cause of death, that's fine, but if they do, it's not on others to wag their fingers at them. Making causes of death some sort of taboo, when a lot of people die from the same causes precisely because the taboo means they're less likely to get help, literally helps no one.


According to Alexi Laiho's sister, quoted above:
Quote:
According to Alexi Laiho's sister, the family asked Kimberly Goss to keep the cause of death as her own information. Iltalehti has seen the exchange of messages on this issue.

- The publication of the cause of death was not made in agreement with our family. Kimberly published details of Alex's death against the will of the family. She was well aware that we did not want this go public, Anna Laiho says.

- Kimberly, as a legal wife, had the right to demand that information (cause of death). She demanded that information through her lawyer. As a family, we expressed the hope that this information would not have been published, but she nevertheless went to do so.

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interstellar_medium
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Mar 12, 2020 9:41 am
Posts: 926
Location: Russia
PostPosted: Mon Mar 08, 2021 2:42 pm 
 

Lord Diabolus wrote:
Quote:
It’s a shame because we would have liked Alex to be remembered for his musical merits, not the weaknesses he had.



Thanks for the article!

This particular thing that his sister says feels so... antiquated. As if his "weaknesses" made him a lesser person somehow.

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~Guest 923966
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Jul 19, 2020 12:25 pm
Posts: 76
PostPosted: Mon Mar 08, 2021 2:47 pm 
 

interstellar_medium wrote:
Lord Diabolus wrote:
Quote:
It’s a shame because we would have liked Alex to be remembered for his musical merits, not the weaknesses he had.



Thanks for the article!

This particular thing that his sister says feels so... antiquated. As if his "weaknesses" made him a lesser person somehow.

I don't think she meant it that way. She just might be afraid of people starting to focus more on his alcoholism (the ''weakness'') more than what he did for the music scene etc..

Which I highly doubt would ever happen.

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interstellar_medium
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Mar 12, 2020 9:41 am
Posts: 926
Location: Russia
PostPosted: Mon Mar 08, 2021 3:04 pm 
 

Frostheimr wrote:
She just might be afraid of people starting to focus more on his alcoholism (the ''weakness'') more than what he did for the music scene etc..

Which I highly doubt would ever happen.


Yeah, quite a few musicians (even before metal) died of similar issues, and it's their music that makes people remember them, not anything else.

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HeavenDuff
Metal freak

Joined: Sun Mar 07, 2010 10:35 pm
Posts: 5164
Location: Montréal
PostPosted: Mon Mar 08, 2021 6:20 pm 
 

Frostheimr wrote:
I don't think she meant it that way. She just might be afraid of people starting to focus more on his alcoholism (the ''weakness'') more than what he did for the music scene etc..

Which I highly doubt would ever happen.


She might not have meant it that way, but this is how it comes across. Like others have stated before, the taboo surrounding addictions such as alcoholism only leads to people wanting to hide it, as if it was shameful and/or if it would somehow taint the amazing life of accomplishments of someone such as Alexi Laiho. It doesn't help people who are struggling with the same issues.

However, this very public drama surrounding his death is much more of a nuisance. It's a shame that people are fighting over the urn of a dead man...

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