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Gemini 7 Rising
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Apr 04, 2013 1:08 am
Posts: 729
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 2:46 pm 
 

Pretty self-explanatory from the title, I thought of this when David Vincent's band 'I Am Morbid' came up in the current Pantera thread. Most agree this is just a lame band name, for whatever reasons, and it would've been so easy to come up with almost anything that was better. It's somewhat subjective, of course, but did Vincent really think that was a cool name or was he being somewhat lazy and presumptuous? I won't get into that, but you're welcome to give your thoughts on the "whys" of whatever you find to be sub-par in quality with whatever band names, song titles, or lyrics you wish to bring up.

With song lyrics, it can be just one line in there that kind of kills it for you, or it can be the majority of the lyrics in a particular song.

With band names, I think there is sometimes a case to be made as to how deciding to call their band by that particular name may have strongly limited the reach and ultimate success of a particular band. But it can be a successful band with a dumb name also.

To get the ball rolling, I'll mention Dim Mak, the band which spun off from the remains of the great early '90s death metal band, 'Ripping Corpse'. Dim Mak is actually a pretty cool name in that it means "Death Touch" in Chinese. However, might that name have limited their reach early on when trying to gain traction, simply because most potential fans (not to mention record store owners/merchandise buyers) would probably have no idea wtf it means or that it was even death metal?
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Forever Underground
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Sep 08, 2018 7:35 am
Posts: 1154
Location: Galiza
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 5:16 pm 
 

Impaled Nazarene enters the battle

Quote:
Sodomize thru the night - who has killed the fucking light
What the fuck do you expect to see
When Jesus lying naked in front of me

Who has killed the fucking light,
Who has killed the fucking light, huh?
You are all doomed to misery
So fuck some goatcorpses in praise of me

Quote:
Lucifer, bring me the fucking pain

Goat

Kill, kill at the first sigh
Pain, pain you will fucking die
Kill, killing he wants to see
Satan, rape underaged fucks for him

Quote:
I was homosexual partner of Jesus Christ

Quote:
[verse II: Vagina]

My soul has been raped once or twice
Third time I come and then you will die

My soul has been raped once or twice
Third time I come and then you will die

Quote:
Centuries ago,
Born of whore,
Jesus Christ,
Filthy homo

Quote:
Under a Golden Shower


Edit: I read "what were they thinking" instead of "what you were thinking".

But basically I have always laughed and will always laugh at the sperpentic lyrics and titles of Impalez Nazarene's first two albums, I guess the rest of their discography will be along the same lines but I haven't listened or paid attention to them.
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77hjrttfred
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jun 10, 2021 7:15 pm
Posts: 411
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 5:24 pm 
 

For the band name, I've always thought that Dew-Scented sounded strange. First of all, what the hell does it mean? Second, it sounds completely non-threatening and weird for a metal band.

I believe the name is inspired by Edgar Allan Poe, but I don't know enough about his books to understand the reference.

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Bloody Nine
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Mar 30, 2012 4:51 pm
Posts: 119
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 5:38 pm 
 

Pretty Maids is a name I could never get on board with.

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DoomMetalAlchemist
Veteran

Joined: Mon Dec 27, 2010 6:10 am
Posts: 2861
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 5:48 pm 
 

It was always irked me that Darkthrone was one word instead of "Dark Throne." Especially since their logo separates it into two words.

Mammoth Weed Wizard Bastard sounds like a joke parody stoner doom band name.

Wizardthrone immediately conjures images of bad Electric Wizard copying, not a melodic death metal band.

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TitaniumNK
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Nov 07, 2011 6:33 pm
Posts: 44
Location: Montenegro
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 5:58 pm 
 

77hjrttfred wrote:
For the band name, I've always thought that Dew-Scented sounded strange. First of all, what the hell does it mean? Second, it sounds completely non-threatening and weird for a metal band.


Nothing wrong with the name, it certainly sounds original and fit for a... folk metal band, certainly not a fucking thrash/death one

It's like finding out that band with a name like Vulvectomy or whatever gruesome procedure plays power metal. Just inappropriate.

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77hjrttfred
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jun 10, 2021 7:15 pm
Posts: 411
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 6:29 pm 
 

TitaniumNK wrote:
Nothing wrong with the name, it certainly sounds original and fit for a... folk metal band, certainly not a fucking thrash/death one

You think? I've always though Dew-Scented sounds like the name of a bottle of perfume. :)

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HighwayCorsair
Knows a guy

Joined: Thu Feb 19, 2015 11:40 pm
Posts: 700
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 6:31 pm 
 

Some obvious ones- R U Dead?, Jumpin' Jesus, Molested
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draconiondevil
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Mar 26, 2008 4:21 pm
Posts: 714
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 6:40 pm 
 

Pink Cream 69 takes the cake for me as the worst band name ever.
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kazhard
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Jul 20, 2020 11:42 pm
Posts: 837
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 6:51 pm 
 

Make a Change… Kill Yourself, obviously. I can’t get over the fact that a grown ass man came up with such a fucking stupid name. Some of his lyrics are among the cringiest stuff I’ve ever read. I understand there is a language barrier and thus some limitations, but come the fuck on.
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Benedict Donald
Veteran

Joined: Tue Aug 24, 2021 10:36 am
Posts: 3085
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 6:56 pm 
 

draconiondevil wrote:
Pink Cream 69 takes the cake for me as the worst band name ever.


LOL....totally.

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King_of_Arnor
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Oct 10, 2020 12:35 pm
Posts: 781
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 7:11 pm 
 

Slauter Xstroyes is such a bizarre band name. Apparently the members came up with it while they were getting high in a basement.
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Slater922
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Apr 14, 2020 6:24 pm
Posts: 2352
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 8:10 pm 
 

I can't get enough of how silly the name Goatpenis is.
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Gemini 7 Rising
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Apr 04, 2013 1:08 am
Posts: 729
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 8:16 pm 
 

TitaniumNK wrote:
77hjrttfred wrote:
For the band name, I've always thought that Dew-Scented sounded strange. First of all, what the hell does it mean? Second, it sounds completely non-threatening and weird for a metal band.


Nothing wrong with the name, it certainly sounds original and fit for a... folk metal band, certainly not a fucking thrash/death one

It's like finding out that band with a name like Vulvectomy or whatever gruesome procedure plays power metal. Just inappropriate.


Funny, but Dew-Scented is one of those names I've seen periodically but which I've never even felt the impulse to look into because of the name. In the back of my mind I think I always just figured it must be some weird folk or power metal hybrid or something like that, but looking at their page, I now realize they're a death/thrash band which I might possibly like. I mean, I love The Crown and they're listed near the top as a 'similar artist', but yeah, that name just automatically repelled any curiosity I might've had before.

And how do you land on a name like that if you're a death/thrash band? Assuming it's more or less a democracy, were there really 3 or more members of the band going, "Fuck yeah, 'Dew-Scented'! That's it! That's what we'll call ourselves! Fucking Dew-Scented!" :lol:
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77hjrttfred
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jun 10, 2021 7:15 pm
Posts: 411
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 8:31 pm 
 

I do recommend checking out their albums. While one could argue that a lot of the albums sound the same, it is pretty kick-ass thrash/death that's definitely worth a listen. They also had this thing of beginning all their albums with the letter "I" for some reason.

I recommend starting with Inwards, Impact or maybe Issue VI.

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Aldrahn333
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Jul 29, 2006 7:28 pm
Posts: 479
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 9:37 pm 
 

Edguy

Strange when not a single band member is named Ed.

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Simfers
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed May 27, 2020 8:20 am
Posts: 181
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 10:01 pm 
 

Of all the bands I love, there's only one I would never wear a shirt of because their name is just too stupid.

That band is Vulvagun. Terrific band, but that name, my god...

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Scorntyrant
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Nov 15, 2004 5:55 am
Posts: 1516
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 10:05 pm 
 

https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/H ... tal/213978
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Metal Shark
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Feb 25, 2014 9:54 am
Posts: 1066
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 10:16 pm 
 

THIS pile of shit from Morbid Angel's I.D.I., which I finally heard the other week:

Radikult 07:37
"Killer kult kult
Killer kult
Killer killer killer kult..."

The lines have long been drawn
Between the life and death,
The right and wrong
But what's the reason,
What's our reason?
The walls are high we know
They've gotta come down

'Cause we've been crossing the line since 1989
We're moving the world
Because our power is a shining
Sick groove with fucking magic to prove that
The radicals are here to stay!

We're living hardcore and radical
We'll always be maniacal and animal
They fear us cause we're physical irrational
Our radi-killer kult is thriving!

Setting fire to everything we see
Fill the rage inside the music... What will be
Given reason then taken away
Because the boundaries are coming down...

'Cause though we live
And breathe we're like nasty machines
Taking out targets and we do it with ease
We've been called,
We scream back never the same
And we tear it up as radicals!

We're banging hardcore radical
Maniacal and animal
Beast stomping with an appetite insatiable
We are the radikult...

We're living hardcore and radical
We'll always be maniacal and animal
They fear us cause we're physical irrational
Our radikult is thriving!

Bang it hardcore and radical
Maniacal and like an animal
Beasts stomping with an appetite insatiable
We are the radikult...

Our beats down
One step close to the fiery end
Just take another dose of our insane world
It all gets better
Feel next to nothing 'til we drop it again
Radical
Radikul
Never made to order unpredictable
Demoniacal and so fanatical are the
Zealots and the martyrs of the radikult
--------------------------------------------------

What "edgy" 13 year old boy wrote this crap??? :lol:


Last edited by Metal Shark on Tue Feb 28, 2023 10:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Metal Shark
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Feb 25, 2014 9:54 am
Posts: 1066
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 10:19 pm 
 

King_of_Arnor wrote:
Slauter Xstroyes is such a bizarre band name. Apparently the members came up with it while they were getting high in a basement.


That DOES explain it.

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Metal Shark
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Feb 25, 2014 9:54 am
Posts: 1066
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 10:20 pm 
 

Slater922 wrote:
I can't get enough of how silly the name Goatpenis is.


THIS! So stupid.

At least go all the way on being "offensive" by calling it GOATCOCK.

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Metal_Jaw
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Sep 30, 2011 12:57 pm
Posts: 753
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2023 11:58 pm 
 

Prostitute Disfigurement makes me go into full body cringes even when just thinking about it.

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Hecatomb867
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Aug 23, 2015 8:56 pm
Posts: 247
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 12:09 am 
 

Does merch count? Cuz if so, man... this Sanguisugabogg longsleeve. Are there actually people who would walk around in public with "I eat my own cum" written on their back?

Spoiler: show
Image


EDIT: added spoiler


Last edited by Hecatomb867 on Wed Mar 01, 2023 12:12 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Gemini 7 Rising
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Apr 04, 2013 1:08 am
Posts: 729
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 12:09 am 
 

77hjrttfred wrote:
I do recommend checking out their albums. While one could argue that a lot of the albums sound the same, it is pretty kick-ass thrash/death that's definitely worth a listen. They also had this thing of beginning all their albums with the letter "I" for some reason.

I recommend starting with Inwards, Impact or maybe Issue VI.


Cool, thanks for the recommendation! I'll give 'em a listen on YouTube... I can always go for some kickass death/thrash. I'm actually listening to Disfear's Live the Storm at the moment, which is more in the crust punk realm, but still, it has that thrashy/death energy and I thought of them earlier when The Crown came up. Love this stuff

Simfers wrote:
Of all the bands I love, there's only one I would never wear a shirt of because their name is just too stupid.

That band is Vulvagun. Terrific band, but that name, my god...


:lol:
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Last edited by Gemini 7 Rising on Wed Mar 01, 2023 12:21 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Gemini 7 Rising
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Apr 04, 2013 1:08 am
Posts: 729
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 12:17 am 
 

Metal Shark wrote:
THIS pile of shit from Morbid Angel's I.D.I., which I finally heard the other week:

Radikult 07:37
"Killer kult kult
Killer kult
Killer killer killer kult..."

The lines have long been drawn
Between the life and death,
The right and wrong
But what's the reason,
What's our reason?
The walls are high we know
They've gotta come down

'Cause we've been crossing the line since 1989
We're moving the world
Because our power is a shining
Sick groove with fucking magic to prove that
The radicals are here to stay!

We're living hardcore and radical
We'll always be maniacal and animal
They fear us cause we're physical irrational
Our radi-killer kult is thriving!

Setting fire to everything we see
Fill the rage inside the music... What will be
Given reason then taken away
Because the boundaries are coming down...

'Cause though we live
And breathe we're like nasty machines
Taking out targets and we do it with ease
We've been called,
We scream back never the same
And we tear it up as radicals!

We're banging hardcore radical
Maniacal and animal
Beast stomping with an appetite insatiable
We are the radikult...

We're living hardcore and radical
We'll always be maniacal and animal
They fear us cause we're physical irrational
Our radikult is thriving!

Bang it hardcore and radical
Maniacal and like an animal
Beasts stomping with an appetite insatiable
We are the radikult...

Our beats down
One step close to the fiery end
Just take another dose of our insane world
It all gets better
Feel next to nothing 'til we drop it again
Radical
Radikul
Never made to order unpredictable
Demoniacal and so fanatical are the
Zealots and the martyrs of the radikult
--------------------------------------------------

What "edgy" 13 year old boy wrote this crap??? :lol:


God, those are horrible lyrics. Edgy 13 year old, exactly.

Also, meant to respond to Forever Underground on Impaled Nazarene's lyrics posted above- I have to agree they go a little overboard with their anti-Jesus rants. I can tolerate it but, having been brought up Catholic, I always find myself asking if it's really necessary to go that far with it. Seems rather juvenile. I like their early music though otherwise.
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NuclearThrashBastard
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Tue Feb 28, 2023 6:20 pm
Posts: 11
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 2:53 am 
 

Slater922 wrote:
I can't get enough of how silly the name Goatpenis is.


Most of their merch is intolerable as well.

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77hjrttfred
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jun 10, 2021 7:15 pm
Posts: 411
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 3:44 am 
 

I know this one often gets mentioned, but Job For A Cowboy I've always thought was a pretty silly name for a metal band.

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Gravetemplar
Metal freak

Joined: Tue Mar 05, 2019 10:08 am
Posts: 4661
Location: Antarctica
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 4:21 am 
 

These lyrics by Forgotten Tomb:

Spoiler: show
Tired of all your bullshit, fed up with all your crap
A bunch of retarded children, all dressed up in black
A mass of nerds, so repressed, behind your PC screens
Trying to appear so evil, to look more and more extreme

A temporary trend you want to live talking shit everyday
You buy a thousand albums, since your parents are the ones who pay
You're a plague to be erased, you're just a waste of life
Now show me your wrists, I will take care of the knife

A negative megalomania
Our weapon to get rid of this scum
Your frustration puts a big smile on my face
I like to provoke your sickening race

"Why don't you kill yourself?"
Too many times I've heard these words,
but still you can't understand
I'm not the one supposed to die
Why don't you take a look
to your silly teenage life?

Always criticizing what I say and who I am
Who are you to judge? I don't really give a damn
You never understood a flying fuck about my belief
Your self-elimination to me would be a nice relief

A negative megalomania
Our weapon to get rid of this scum
Your frustration puts a big smile on my face
I like to provoke your sickening race

Now I know my mistake:
I overvalued people' minds
but still you can't understand
I'm just a wise man
Smiling while I drink some whiskey,
as you complain about how I'm "fake"...

KILL YOURSELF-

Rumours and infamies never managed to stop us
Your pathetic lies were just free promotion
Death threats gone invain, you can't kill who's already dead
Your hate towards us, our fame grows inexorably

(Got some load of misery for ya)

Devil Bless Negativity-

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lordcatfish
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jul 27, 2006 2:44 pm
Posts: 1465
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 4:48 am 
 

Aldrahn333 wrote:
Edguy

Strange when not a single band member is named Ed.

It was a nickname for their maths teacher when they were in school (which you may already know). The band formed when they were 14, so it probably seemed hilarious back then, and they just stuck with it. Certainly not your standard power metal sort of name. In fact, I probably swerved them because of it, until I saw them live at a festival.
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mirons
Metalhead

Joined: Tue May 11, 2004 12:59 pm
Posts: 663
Location: Latvia
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 5:18 am 
 

I think I mentioned this in another thread, but Fvneral Fvkk certainly doesn't make one think of epic doom metal.

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morbert
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Mar 14, 2007 2:36 am
Posts: 1277
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 5:53 am 
 

I love bandnames that are outside subgenre dogmas. It often pisses off or keeps out the gatekeepers (that is real karma eh) and other fundamentalists.
I don't have many 'wtf were you thinking' moments concerning bandnames or songtitles. it is what it is and I like it or not.
Many bandnames that were cool in the eighties are now cliché and/or cheesy. so who gives a F. A lot is a sign of the times anway.
Lyrics.... 99% of the time I care little about lyrics in metal as they are rarely eloquent or intellligent. But it is not what I'm looking for in metal anyway.
Good lyrics are a bonus, not a standard

So IF I have a "what were you thinking" moment it is mostly about artwork really or bandpictures/outfits. There are still so many eighties albums I love to listen to but never bought because the band just were too silly looking or the artwork too stupid to have it my collection.
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SentByTheDevil87
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Mar 01, 2021 8:38 am
Posts: 40
Location: Future World
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 6:08 am 
 

I always found it funny that Anthem's arguably heaviest album was titled Domestic Booty.

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draconiondevil
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Mar 26, 2008 4:21 pm
Posts: 714
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 2:16 pm 
 

SentByTheDevil87 wrote:
I always found it funny that Anthem's arguably heaviest album was titled Domestic Booty.


This is what I call an "ESL album title". Nothing wrong with being ESL, of course, but it's funny when an album is called something no native would ever think of. Another great example is Scald's album "Will of Gods Is a Great Power".
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Judas Maiden
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Dec 22, 2021 3:56 pm
Posts: 861
Location: Philippines
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 2:43 pm 
 

Vio-lence dealt with serious topics on their first two albums so it was very surprising that they included the back to back salvo of "Gutterslut" and "Dicks of Death" on the Torture Tactics EP. It was probably funny for its time (1991) but even though I'm not a woke kid, I still find the lyrics cringe-y reading it now:

Spoiler: show
I need a gutterslut oh so bad
The kind of slut that's dirty and bad
I'm gonna fuck her till she pees
I'm gonna make this bitch bleed

Fuck her in the ass good and hard
After I've chased her through the yard
I don't use vaseline 'cause I like to
Fuck dirty and mean

Slut! Slut!

Strip your clothes off with my eyes
Ram my pecker right up inside
The bitch starts whimpering to me
In the morning will you respect me?

Awakened rudely in my bed
The bitch just slapped me upside the head
I see the front door's open wide
So I kick this fucking bitch right outside

Lines for whores!

I've had you too many times before
Your cunthole's begin to widen more
I'll have to tie a board to my ass
Or lose my life in your unforgiving crack

Slut! Slut!

Slut! Slut! Slut! Slut! Slut!
Slut! Slut! Slut! Slut! Slut!
Slut! Slut! Slut! Slut! Slut!
Slut! Slut! Slut! Slut! Slut!

Lines for whores!


Spoiler: show
My dick's so big I have to wrap it round my leg
And if you piss me off I'll jack off in your face
I got loads of jizz... you can suck me all night
You can swallow my children alright (aiight?! aiight?!)

Coz we've got the dicks of death
We've got the dicks of death (suck it whore)
We've got the dicks of death
12 inches of dangling doom, ough!

Don't care if they're skinny don't care if they're all lard
I'm gonna fuck... juicy tits and I'll fuck 'em real hard
... anal intruder
And if my dick gets stuck we'll just call Roto Rooter

I've got the dicks of death
I've got the dicks of death
We've got the dicks of death
12 inches of dangling doom!

We've got the dicks of death (yeah whore)
We've got the dicks of death
We've got the dicks of death
12 inches of dangling doom!

We've got the dicks of death (east coast!)
We've got the dicks of death (west coast!)
We've got the dicks of death (east coast!)
(East coast... west coast)

Lines for whores!

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pressingtoplead13
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Jun 18, 2009 6:05 pm
Posts: 740
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 3:24 pm 
 

I'm sure there is so many things that could go in this thread if I actually sat back and thought about it, but since I've been spinning "Molesting The Decapitated" quite a bit the last few days I couldn't help but laugh at the line in "Fucked to death" "I must take shit on this fuckin' bitch
I let one fly onto her face" lmao, I mean, i realize Devourment's lyrics are over the top and not meant to be taken seriously but I was under the impression they were trying to atleast sound menacing or tough and violent, that line is just comically cheesy.

Also gonna throw all of the racist bands in this category, your music may or may not be good, but i'd prefer you keep that dumb bullshit to your own pathetic minds.

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sjal
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Apr 04, 2017 9:15 am
Posts: 306
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 5:21 pm 
 

morbert wrote:
I love bandnames that are outside subgenre dogmas. It often pisses off or keeps out the gatekeepers (that is real karma eh) and other fundamentalists.

I guess my view on these things is too boring/simple, but I really do not mind "cliché"/"typical" band names in certain subgenres of metal music, and I'm rather positive about them.

For example, I like "sad and atmospheric" names (such as October Tide, Trees of Eternity, Shape of Despair, Forest of Shadows, etc.) in melodic and atmospheric doom and doom/death metal - it turned out that many bands with these kinds of names became my all-time favorites, and I always check out new bands that have these kinds of names.

When it comes to a question about bands in these subgenres who have names that are very non-standard/"out of place" for the subgenres, I think it would make the most sense in cases where a style of music/lyrical themes/imagery of such bands were also non-standard/too specific. For example, there was this band - https://www.metal-archives.com/bands/Vi ... ation/3026 which also has an album that is melodic doom/death metal musically but at the same time which has much more extreme and atypical themes/imagery for this subgenre. Yes, the band name is very "out of place" for the subgenre because it makes you think that this band has more extreme music but at the same time it is still quite informative because the name is related to and fits their imagery/lyrics (and there are people like me for whom it looks way too extreme and unacceptable, regardless of the relatively accessible music).

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Slater922
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Apr 14, 2020 6:24 pm
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PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 7:47 pm 
 

Hecatomb867 wrote:
Does merch count? Cuz if so, man... this Sanguisugabogg longsleeve. Are there actually people who would walk around in public with "I eat my own cum" written on their back?

Spoiler: show
Image


EDIT: added spoiler

This shirt basically screams "Effort, what's that?"
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Empyreal
The Final Frontier

Joined: Thu Nov 30, 2006 6:58 pm
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Location: Where the dead rule the night
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 8:14 pm 
 

All for non-genre conforming names and titles, but Metal Church - Hanging in the Balance is too much. And the name Vulvagun makes them too goofy to discuss with anyone not already really deep into that style of power metal unfortunately.
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Oxenkiller
Veteran

Joined: Sat Feb 09, 2008 3:42 am
Posts: 3616
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 9:33 pm 
 

There was some Arizona band called Pedifile back in the late 1980s. They were on one of those compilations "Satan's Revenge Part 2" or something, I think. I can't imagine getting away with calling your band that, even back then. That's one of those lines you just shouldn't cross. I remember hearing that particular compliation (I think New Jersey Unsane and Necrovore were on that comp. too) but Pedifile were...lets just say, not one of the better bands on there.

Iwrestledabearonce, Job for a cowboy, car door dick smash...there are tons of examples out there with utterly stupid band names. In most cases, the music is almost as bad as the band name.

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RainyTheBusinessPerson
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Oct 29, 2016 10:50 pm
Posts: 184
Location: Southern Hemisphere
PostPosted: Wed Mar 01, 2023 9:47 pm 
 

Some of these names and lyrics are cracking me up. Anyway, this feels harder to think about than I expected, I know some "proto" names for bands can be pretty bad (Gypsy's Kiss for Iron Maiden, The Polka Tulk Blues Band for Black Sabbath, etc), but these obviously shouldn't count. I feel like mentioning grind bands and the like also is missing the point for most of them, since they're supposed to be silly, juvenile and tongue-in-cheek. I won't count joke bands either for the same reason.

I guess as far as really questionable stuff goes when it comes to more serious bands, Helloween is the first one that comes to mind. They have some weird ass titles for a few songs and albums like "Heavy Metal Hamsters", "Don't Spit on my Mind" (I don't even know wtf is that supposed to mean), "Pink Bubbles Go Ape" (again, I have no idea) and some more.
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