Jallikattu - Villagers team together to recapture a runaway buffalo.
This is a hidden gem worth watching. It's a Malayalam film but it is completely different from major Indian films in editing, soundtrack, characters etc. The energy it has in portraying the village's attempts to capture the buffalo is something that I don't see usually in Indian productions, but this is a smaller, more independent film, so I think that's be the reason why. Anyway, it definitely made me be on the look out for more Lijo Jose Pellissery stuff.

Help, Help, the Globolinks! - The Earth is invaded by aliens whose only weakness is music.
This was a German sorta sci-fi TV opera, where some students are stranded on a road amidst an alien invasion, and the aliens are these dancers with full body costumes, which can turn others into "globolinks" as well. I liked those abstract metal sculptures/structures, but other than that there's not much to talk about, it's basically divided in three parts, they decide who goes to the school for help, the teachers in the school decide how they're gonna rescue the children, and then they both meet in the end and the "globolinks" go away. Eh.

Mardaani - A female officer unravels a child trafficking ring.
It's not a bad Indian film, I mean, bonus points for not being a masala, but it's a run-of-the-mill action/thriller film with the only difference being that the main character is a tough female police officer.

Archangel - An American soldier suffers from amnesia in Russia in WWI.
Guy Maddin film, but it wasn't as enticing as The Forbidden Room. Still haven't given up on him, I do want to watch more of his movies, he always nails the silent-era-like look on his films.

If Anything Happens I Love You - A mother and a father reminisce about their daughter.
I'll be honest, I just watched this to see if it would affect me too, seeing that almost everyone that wrote about it said they cried. Now, I completely understand it and it was well done, to a point, but I couldn't connect it enough to affect me. Sorry.

Two Days, One Night - A woman has a weekend to convince her colleagues to not take a bonus payment that would cause her to lose her job.
When I read the plot I thought this would have a little more comedy, but it's a completely serious drama with a character who suffers of depression and still has to go through this stuff. Marion Cotillard nails the lead role and you can feel the stress along with her in each of her conversations, but the way this was shot and edited made me lose interest as it went on. Still finished it though, haha.

Jacob's Ladder - A war veteran starts having hallucinations.
This is somewhat odd because it doesn't look like it is. Everything you see is from the perspective of the main character, and it's well done enough that you also start having doubts about what is real and what is not. Except that what isn't real feels just as tangible as what is real. Or vice-versa. Well, by the end everything "makes sense", but it doesn't make the stuff in it less weird.

Alice - I mean, it's Alice in Wonderland.
Alice enters Wonderland through an elevator she finds in a room she enters through a drawer from a desk that is in the middle of a rocky desert that is an extension of her own room. You get the idea, right? Every character other than Alice (at some points even Alice herself) is a stuffed animal animated through stopmotion. It's a Jan Svankmajer film, so it would be weird if it didn't have any stopmotion. It's a really unique and creative vision.

Justice League - Heroes fight a villain.
I don't know if I mentioned previously, but I started watching the DCEU because of the new JL version that's coming out this year, it looked odd enough to pique my interest. But this was bad. Joss Whedon's directing style doesn't stick as well here as it did in the MCU, and even in that it started to get bad from Age of Ultron onwards. Jason Momoa was alright, Ezra Miller feels miscast, Ben Afflect (thanks Rich Evans) is still Batman, Gal Gadot (unfortunately) still is Wonder Woman and Ray Fisher is barely there. Steppenwolf is probably only memorable because of how forgettable he is.

Terminator Genisys - I don't know anymore
This feels like such a waste, but it's an interesting waste. Arnold Schwarzenegger is back and is pretty much the only enjoyable thing because it's Arnold Schwarzenegger. The rest of the cast feels so random. I mean, it's basically Terminator 1, until it isn't. I mean, the trailers had already revealed the big twist, so whatever. Kyle Reese is sent to the past to save Sarah Connor, except there is already a Terminator there protecting her. They go to the future (then-present) and meet John Connor, but now he's a Terminator too. The action is standard, but nothing special.

We Can Be Heroes - Superheroes' kids have to rescue their parents after they're kidnapped by aliens.
Robert Rodriguez' latest movie and it's ok. Definitely not his best and might be a recycling of Spy Kids' plot? I don't know, haven't watched any Spy Kids other than 3 yet, but anyway, it's still better than Machete Kills or Sin City 2, though it's a step down from Alita: Battle Angel.

Clue - Seven people in a mansion try to solve a murder.
I really enjoyed this one, Tim Curry was great and so was Madeline Kahn whenever she had a chance to shine. The only thing I didn't really like it's the fact that it has three endings.

The Mechanic - A hitman decides to take a target's son under his wing.
Somewhat different from what Charles Bronson would end up doing under Cannon years later, this one he's more laid back as his character takes time to examine his targets and prepare the way he kills them instead of going in all guns blazing. You can see the end coming, but the very last shot makes it all worth it.

High Flying Bird - A sports agent needs to come up with a plan to save one of his clients during an NBA lockout.
Another one of Steven Soderbergh's shot-on-iPhone films, and it's pretty much the only reason I watched it, same with his Unsane. Despite that, it's an entertaining sports film with a little bit of what happens with the up-and-coming players in NBA.

I Am the Pretty Thing That Lives in the House - A nurse moves to an old writer's house to take care of her.
This one was a rewatch, because I didn't like it the first time I've seen it. Having watched it again, though, I still don't like it. Oz Perkins can be a good director as proven by The Blackcoat's Daughter and (presumably) Gretel and Hansel, but this one feels more like an experiment rather than an actual horror film. The whole movie is pretty much a build-up for the ending, but everything is so slow that it feels like almost nothing happens.

American Ninja 2: The Confrontation - Michael Dudikoff has to investigate the disappearance of marines in a remote island.
Now I don't like Michael Dudikoff, but this is such a feel good summer action schlock with a ludicrous plot (marines being kidnapped to become brainwashed superhuman ninjas) that you can just ignore him. Once more, I think Steve James should have been the protagonist, he is the complete opposite of the massive charisma void that Dudikoff is.

Raman Raghav 2.0 - A corrupt cop tries to catch a man committing a series of murders inspired by an old 60's Indian serial killer.
I'm on Anurag Kashyap's tail just because I want to watch his No Smoking eventually, but he has this, Black Friday, Shaitan and Bombay Talkies on Netflix, I think. Anyway, in this movie we have two antagonists who are bad guys for different reasons. It's expected that the criminal won't redeem himself, but the main "good" guy is just as bad and maybe even more reckless than the killer.

Cyborg - A mercenary tries to rescue a cyborg from a post-apocalyptic gang.
I thought Albert Pyun and Jean Claude Van Damme would make an interesting combination, but this was pretty lackluster, the villain has a nice concept visually but is devoid of personality. Pretty much everyone was devoid of personality, and the only good-looking scene (and the excuse to set this up as "post-apocalypse") was the one in the city where the cyborg lady is kidnapped.

Murphy’s Law - A police detective is framed for the murder of his wife by an old criminal he arrested.
Cannon Bronson! It's your usual Cannon movie, just more toned down to be a little more thriller than straight up action, though it has its fair share of it.

Yesterday There Were Strange Things in the Sky - A man tries to finish his movie in his house with his family.
An uninteresting film about uninteresting people doing uninteresting things. No one cares about what happens, what happens doesn't matter. The film starts and ends, I wish I'd never started it, I wish it ended as soon as I started it. A film that tries to be smart when it isn't. Something that happens in the last 10 minutes is spoiled in the plot description and you just keep waiting for it to happen, and it never comes, and when it does, is of so little importance that even the character with which it happens says it didn't make a difference.

Tracy Morgan: Staying Alive - Stand-up comedy show after Tracy Morgan got better from the accident.
Eh, ti's stand-up, wasn't anything special. Felt like it had the wrong audience though.

The Lonely Island Presents: The Unauthorized Bash Brothers Experience - A video album fictionalizing the story of the Bash Brothers.
I don't care about baseball, I don't really care about The Lonely Island; never was much into SNL stuff. But it was there one day, and it was a half-hour that seemed random so I thought "eh, what the hell."

Tromeo & Juliet - It's Romeo and Juliet, but it's "Tromeo". Because it's a Troma movie.
Humble beginnings, eh James Gunn? A bit all over the place, but feels just as without substance as other Troma movies. I imagine. I don't know, the last Troma film I've seen was Poultrygeist over 10 years ago.

The Open House - Mother and son stay in a house that's open for buyers and are the target of an unknown assailant.
I've seen the reviews and the scores and everything, but I still thought this could be seen in a different way, that the killer would have something different about him, like an unstoppable force. Nope, they (and us) just get teased for 75 minutes and then they're just killed.

American Ninja 3: Blood Hunt - A martial artist has to fight against a madman who wants to test a new drug on him.
David Bradley is an improvement over Michael Dudikoff as a person, but the action is dull, the plot is uninteresting; it's weaker than the first movie. Steve James still is the best thing about these movies.

TekWar - An ex-cop is hired to find a missing scientist.
I could see this being a series. I know it became one, but I mean this, the first one, could have been just episodes. It's pretty bland and William Shatner is just the "mission giver man", so he doesn't have much screen time, and the little he has isn't anything special.

Alone in the Dark - A PI gets entangled in a supernatural plot involving child experiments related to an ancient race of creatures.
How did Uwe Boll keep getting these movies done? How did people keep giving him these chances? There is nothing here related to the games except that the name of the protagonist is also Edward Carnby. Stephen Dorff is pretty much the only one that seems to give a damn here, also goddamn I didn't know Tara Reid was in this, she was bad in everything I watched with her in it. Also, what's up with that "shooting in the dark" scene?

Cymbeline - A man is exiled from the biker gang whose leader's daughter he is in love with.
Another one of those Shakespeare adaptations where they keep the dialog but modernize the setting. I liked Coriolanus, thought Almereyda's Hamlet was ok and I still want to watch Titus, but this was so boring. I didn't care about the protagonist, I don't like Dakota Johnson, I think Anton Yelchin didn't care for anything either.

Orpheus - A poet enamoured with Death goes to the underworld to rescue his wife.
This was pretty good! The whole underworld setting was great, the supernatural elements were varied and sprinkled here and there enough that they actually were impactful whenever they happened, the special effects were creative, everything was great.

Beau - A man is haunted by strange happenings before leaving for a trip.
Watched after reading that Ari Aster is making a feature-length version of this. Now, I didn't like Midsommar as much as Hereditary, but I haven't given up on Ari yet, if he doesn't screw up this could be really good. The feeling of dread and terror you feel along with the main character is great as everything and everyone seems to be attacking him and there is no explanation for anything, including the ending.

The Strange Thing About the Johnsons - A father and a son have an unusual relationship.
Decided to watch it after Beau. I went in kinda knowing what it was about, so it didn't surprise me that much. It's like The Human Centipede, where things are implied rather than explicitly shown. The dad here is played by the same actor that played the main in Beau, and his acting here is just as good in that. Since it's a 20 minute piece there isn't much time to develop things, but the acting all-around is pretty good.

The Fantastic Four - Four scientists, space, powers, fight villain.
The story is the same, but what I watched was the 1994 unofficially released version that Roger Corman produced for someone's rights-keeping. And the result is pretty entertaining and relatively well done for something that wasn't even supposed to be released. I still don't really know Doctor Doom became Doctor Doom, but his acting was quite theatrical, with lots of wide dramatic movements and gestures. The weird thing here for me is The Jeweler character, somehow he doesn't really seem to fit in with everything else.

Blood Diner - Two brothers prepare a ritual feast to resurrect an ancient goddess.
A ridiculous comedy horror that originally was supposed to be a sequel to Blood Feast, it's quite a fun movie. It's also really weird, the brothers are under their uncle's guidance, except he is a brain and eyes in a jar, a minor character is just an immobile doll etc. They are so blatant and enthusiastic about the stuff they're doing you can't help but root that they actually manage to resurrect the goddess.

Jailbreak - A group of police officers have to survive during a jailbreak in a prison.
Cambodian action film, and it's pretty much the sole reason I had an interest in it. It's not bad, but it's pretty basic. The fight scenes were alright, but it feels repetitive; not that I was expecting a big budget kinda deal, but it feels like they use the same corridors multiple times. Also it doesn't really seem to finish, it just stops, there's not much of a conclusion.

Sin City: A Dame to Kill For - Three and a half more stories in Sin City.
Not nearly as unique as the first one, it's pretty much a companion piece in quality to Machete Kills, maybe even to Spy Kids 4, again, I haven't seen any other than the third. I'm amazed at how many stars Robert Rodriguez crams in his movies; still the cast doesn't save this from being just a regular noir thriller packaged in a strong black-and-white colored style.

CyberTracker - A secret service agent is framed by the mayor and is the target of android exterminators.
Just because of RedLetterMedia's failed attempt to be interested in it ("she is ACTING!"). And I don't blame them, there isn't much here to work with in any way, it's a regular 90's futuristic action b-movie with subpar action and an uncharismatic protagonist played by Don "The Dragon" Wilson. Who was also uncharismatic in The Last Sentinel so I wasn't expecting much. What I didn't know is that Richard Norton is in this and I kept rooting for him to show up, I liked him in both Rage & Honor films.

Burning - A guy's childhood friend comes back from a trip with a mysterious man.
This movie is pure implication, is the man really what he seems to be or is it all a coincidence? Did something actually happen to the girl or not? Was the greenhouse talk for real or not? But while I appreciate that, I feel it is a little too open and the end felt like too much of an easy way out for the man. This one also just ends after a point, but I guess it's expected with the whole feel of the movie.