Whats everyone's views on it? is it worthless or just plane lame and gay. Or if you think you met someone who your certain that you love this person and is planning to meet them one day, is it worth it to carry on talking to them some how?

Not saying that i actually internet date, just interested in peoples thoughts. Because this day and age technology is really starting to rise and I think dating like this could advance to a more serious level?

Moved to the Tavern. Not even close to Symposium material.

I wouldn't do online dating even if I was that desperate, basically because I know that for the most part, the women that would use online dating services are probably ugly as fuck, not to mention pathetic.

But say what if you met them on some kind of forum or serious online game then contacted them on a instant messenger such as MSN? online dating services are kind of different.

Well, hot girls use the internet as well but from what I've observed, girls willing to get romantically involved with someone they met on the internet are usually losers, though it depends on the type of community I guess. You meet them in real life and they're all awkward.

Or they're men...

Seriously though, I'm pretty neutral on the subject about people meeting and becoming romantiacally involved over the internet. If I was ever in the situation of being approached by a girl over the internet myself, I'd be a little suspicious as to what she'd really be like though. This is basically because most of the cases of online dating that I've seen IRL has followed this model:

Two people of different gender who are pathetic losers and can't get any in their own neighbourhood goes on the internet. They then start chatting somehow, through some forum/online game/community and see their chance of finally getting some. After that, they keep chatting, brag to all their loser friends about having a girlfriend/boyfriend who doesn't even live in the same fucking country as themselves, and PERHAPS meeting the person some day.

Sound nice? I didn't think so. It's not that I'm against online dating. I'm just against finding myself to be part of this pathetic model I just described. Therefore, if I was ever to try online dating (which is doubtful in the first place), I'd sure as hell be very careful never to get into the pathetic scenario that I described, and if I'd start seeing tendencies pointing towards the aforementioned model, I'd break it off and find a girl IRL instead.

What I'd also do is I'd sure as hell not date anyone who lives half a planet away (I'll leave all the aussie girls to Mikey ) unless something drastically changes and I'd move there/the girl in question would move here.

I would also like to meet the person IRL as soon as possible, if nothing else as a confirmation that said girl is actually serious. After that I'd also see it neccissary to meet her IRL on a regular basis, to avoid the pathetic kind of "hey let's fuck over msn" type of relationship.

Didn't Vintersemestre (US) and Jessica (??) (UK) meet here, and then visited each other? I think they got married...

Yes, he whisked her away on a magic carpet like he said he would... right into his kitchen...

Interestingly enough, my friend used an online dating service to try and meet guys, however I don't think she needed to, as she's an attractive girl. I'll never understand why she did it or how she got so desperate. I don't think she uses it anymore, to my knowledge.

I would personally never use it. My mate has suggested I go to one of those speed-dating places, however. I highly doubt that'll happen.

That's not true, Mikey! I met up with a girl I met online once and it was you!

You can't know anything for certain about them other than the fact that they have a computer, so I would definitely recommend meeting them face to face as soon as possible.

I wouldn't do it, but I've heard of cases where the relationship has worked out, so I'm not against it.

I have meet probably a dozen women online over the years thru dating websites. Out of those I have had two long term relationships (18 months and my current one going on 5 years.) Yeah there are some odd bods online and some right human pigs but there are also some genuine people there too.

I met one woman who practially wanted to marry me the same day we met. Gave good head she did but beyond that... nah.

Best thing about it is you take out the hunt for someone out of the equation. You know what they are there for and as such you dont have too hope he/she is single if you are out and see someone you think is attractive. Unless they also completely lie you can also see how compatible you are with a person before you meet them.

Seriously dude, give it a go, nothing to lose.

I would probably add to this thread, that meeting someone as a friend i.e. platonically first is not so creepy, especially when there's a common interest involved.



I saw Jessica at a Negura Bunget gig the other day.

It sometimes works.

/burn


Was that directed at me? I don't think I'll do it, as I really have no interest in trying it.

That's a good story for you, though. It's good to hear some of the success stories from that type of thing, rather than the cons and failures.

It can work, but only if the participants involved are mature and patient, and completely honest with eachother. Phone calls are necessary, and probably webcams, et cetera, and plans to meet offline eventually. Most of the time, I seem to see the types that follow Asar's model.

A friend of mine's father met someone online dating and she lived in like New Zealand. Anyways, they talked for a long time online and then he finally went over to meet her and after meeting her he just stopped talking to her, just because she smoked. Dumb, huh?

I don't really see the point of online dating people from overseas, but I wouldn't see any problem with using it as an initial step to meeting people nearby, I'd probably go for that before I went to a fucking speed dating thing (Probably because I'm pathetic and ugly). I'd think that meeting people online for the sole purpose of dating would be kind of weird though.

I couldn't see it being used for more than just an initial contact sort of deal, for instance I've met some people here (not for dating, remember this place is like 98% male, just friends as an example) who I would happily meet in real life because they seem like good blokes. Trying to get close to someone using nothing but the internet for months sounds like it wouldn't work very well.

You just summed up the best reason to avoid online dating with one sentence, the second reason being my model of the pathetic online dater who can't get any IRL.

Basing an intimate relationship on talking to somebody on the internet seems like a really odd way to go about it to me. Perhaps that's just me though.

I'd also like to think that it's beneath me to register at one of those online dating site and putting myself on an equal level with those pathetic losers. The way I see it, if you can't get any in real life, you should probably work on the cause of this problem rather than registering at some site where other people who can't get any come together in the hope of getting some.

The one thing I could understand is if you lived in the middle of nowhere with no girls/guys around worth caring about. It is maybe in that case, that these sites might have a purpose IMO. This would require said person to move out of the middle of nowhere to actually meet the person they're dating though, unless they can somehow drag said person into the middle of nowhere.

I thought people only date online when there young haha. Anyway, I did suffer from online dating when I was a youngin of 14 years old. I met this girl on a chatroom, and we "hit it off" pretty great. After a a few months of talking online, we started talking on the phone. Hours and hours on the phone. Then one day, after bout 8 months I think, I broke it off with her. She called me that same nigh balling her eyes out. That was my last encounter of her or online "dating" for that matter. For the record, she lived in the same state as I do, but us being young, we couldn't see each other w/o driving. We tried to meet somewhere, but it wouldn't happen.

A couple relatives of mine met their spouses online, and thus far, one is happy as ever. And from what I've observed and heard, it's going great.

As far as the other is concerned, their relationship soured quickly after it became revealed that the woman he met suffered several serious mental disorders, including Paranoia.

I'm truly indifferent to what people do online.

I met my old lady on MySpace(a place for fuck buddies) three years ago and we're still together. We IMed, did the phone calls, webcams with boobie shots, and a month later met her in real life and we've been together ever since. So it's possible if both individuals are patient and mature about it.

Agreed with all those who wouldn't actually meet anyone from the internet for this purpose, although my best friend met her boyfriend through my old [horror movie-related] website and they've been together for like 5 years now. I've never looked at online dating though. personally, any guys who have hit on me from the internet have been creepy as fuck and i would never meet them in real life. in fact i've only met one person from the internet in real life ever. I'm not gonna judge others if they meet people online, I just wouldn't do it myself, and I've even been known to get offended when people send me unsolicited photos of themselves on instant messengers because I sometimes interpret this as being creepy and fishing for compliments, when I just use the internet to discuss music really, not to look for guys.

well,one thing is using a online dating site or forum or whatever,i dont even know how that works but have kinda have an idea,and other thing is meeting someone online like on metal forum or Hi5 or Facebook and that kind of things.
Personally i wouldnt and i will never use some online dating service,cuz one thing is one site just made for dating,were ppl go there with that intention,and well,that normally means desperate ugly girls, and other is something like hi5/facebook etc where ppl can just comment the pictures,see the pictures and profiles of someone,and choose if they want or not to contact them.

Well,ive met up some ppl from myspace and a metal forum from my country and it was/is cool.the only thing that is a little weird is the transition from the online talking with actually talk to someone live,that u probably already know some things but never really talked with him/her

sorry about my horrible english

I would guess this is rarely true, if by compatibility you mean chemistry. Internet profiles, IMs, and e-mails seem inherently incapable of capturing a person's "vibe," their real-life presence and character, unless it's marked by some pretty rare and unsubtle qualities.

I did match.com for a while and found it to be quite the bullshit. I almost want to say it'd be better if people were more willing to treat online dating as just a step above blind dating, to choose their dates on the basis of pictures and concrete information - "work full-time, non-smoker, no kids," as opposed to "nice, funny, interesting." Match.com makes people work pretty hard to convey the latter, which is frustrating and pointless. I felt like I lost a lot of potential dates because of my choice of words (sometimes I think my delivery and demeanor are the only things that can save me), and the one date I did actually get, after it seemed we'd established some rapport via e-mail, was a complete bore, no spark at all.

Unholy_Asar nailed it.

I would personally never go that route but not because of the 'stooping down to that level' thing (although that does strike me as extremely pathetic). I'd say I'm pretty damn good at reading people's personalities in person based on body language and physical cues. For me, I just can't get the same understanding of a person's character with a digital wall in the way. Entering into a relationship with someone I've never so much as touched or seen with my own two eyes?--forget about it.

I'll acknowledge that it's possible for an online/phone/whatever relationship to become a real life thing after the first meeting but based on what I've observed, that is extremely extremely rare. And I'll quote my mother on this one: until you've eaten a sack of salt with someone, you don't know them.

I've never "online dated" as such, but the last girlfriend was one I met on the internet. She turned out to be a crazy bitch, though, so I'm not going there again.

I should mention that my friend was "dating" an American woman for 6 years. They would always call each other, webcam, talk over the computer, etc.. He was even considering marriage, which I found absurd, considering they hadn't even shook hands. That went on for six years, never meeting each other, until one of them broke it off. He was apparently sad that it happened, but it looks like he's moved on.

So yeah, it can happen, but my friend's case is quite rare in terms of longevity. You're right in saying it's extremely rare for anything serious to occur over the Internet/phone.

6 Years? shit what did they talk about that kept it going...

Phone sex?

I have no idea. I never really ask about that. They must've really clicked if they both decided to devote 6 years of their lives together...yet apart.


After six years, I wouldn't discount it, but I'd rather not picture my mate stroking his bits to her breathy voice.

I don't know... I've always thought of online dating as completely anti-romantic... what if an online relationship actually worked out and resulted in marriage and children, what do you tell your children about how you met?

"Well I remember the first time I saw her MySpace profile, it was gorgeous! She had the most beautiful profile picture too, and I just fell in love with her profile song... what was it again? I forgot too but I loved it as well!... oh really? Nevermind, that song sucks, but with her countenance it sounded like an angel's chorus!"

That's really sort of ... weird from both sides of the equation. Even phonesex, webcam shows, and whatever else, how can you feel that intimate with someone you haven't even MET?! It's creepily easy to manipulate your looks if you have control over what your partner sees.
What if their breath smells or they have really bad warts they've hidden from you or their nose is more off-centered than you'd like? We were geared evolutionarily to find people who look like they'd produce fine-lookin' babies and the internet comes close to spoiling that aspect of sex and relationships.

Also, ampc brings up a great point too. The embarrassment just isn't worth it. I'm glad my parents met on a bus.

I agree. It's like he abstained from actual sex and intimacy for six years to please someone from the USA. Plus, you would think that one would visit the other in that time, right? It's quite absurd for me, and I try not to discuss it with him.

Even the best technology can't compensate equally to a real hug or a kiss.

Your parents met on a bus? How romantic.

Sorry, no.