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CHAIRTHROWER
Methed-burnt rogue babelfish

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 565
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Wed Feb 05, 2020 9:12 pm 
 

(JUST ERASED LAST POST 'COS IT SCARED EVERYONE AWAY SUPPOSEDLY!)

says the man of [capital] letters...

Felix, can I link G.T. with your Heathen review (sardonic emoji here, please)?


Last edited by CHAIRTHROWER on Sun Feb 09, 2020 7:52 am, edited 2 times in total.
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SweetLeaf95
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Dec 16, 2014 1:19 am
Posts: 868
Location: United States
PostPosted: Thu Feb 06, 2020 12:17 pm 
 

Haha, I heard that one too. The first one was the one I was more familiar with and just had more to say about, so I just went with it.
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CHAIRTHROWER
Methed-burnt rogue babelfish

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 565
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Thu Feb 06, 2020 3:51 pm 
 

(Even for myself, my last post was way too inane for this forum!)

That suggested (i.e. owned up to) recommend this feisty little read, by a wizened newcomer:

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... r64/353024

(Just beware of uproariously titled tracks, such as "Instant Onanizer"* and "Gigolo-G Spot", and you'll do just fine!)

*Should actually read "Onanist" Shall we tell them?

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Napalm_Satan
Ever-Opening Flower

Joined: Sat Apr 18, 2015 4:27 pm
Posts: 3381
Location: London, UK
PostPosted: Sun Feb 09, 2020 3:55 pm 
 

I sometimes forget the amount of formatting options available for reviews.

I pretty much only use italics these days (with bold making appearances in the past) but yeah you can link to things in the review. Don't really feel this writer's usage of the feature though, it doesn't seem all that necessary, it could be intrusive when say scrolling down on a phone, and it's honestly kind of ugly.


Last edited by Napalm_Satan on Mon Feb 10, 2020 7:10 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Cat III
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Apr 21, 2017 11:44 am
Posts: 318
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Feb 10, 2020 2:48 am 
 

The links are indeed unnecessary, as they're all to bands, artists, albums that will be familiar to anyone reading a review of Bathory or any semi-underground 80s metal (and even if they weren't, the search bar is right up there). For a first review, it's not bad. I'm biased as he devotes a big chunk of it to one of my pet issues: giving Welcome to Hell its rightful due as the first black metal album. He didn't even have to slag Bathory's debut in doing so, giving it a 90%, though his words seem to indicate more of an 80%. Also, I think Saikku may be incorrect on one of his points: if memory serves, Quorthon did eventually credit Venom for influencing him. I remember an MTV clip where he alludes to them as "guys from Newcastle" or something to that effect.
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KrigareTjovane
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Mar 18, 2013 2:06 am
Posts: 283
Location: Shadow Mountains
PostPosted: Mon Feb 10, 2020 3:56 am 
 

Not naming names because I have nothing against anyone in particular, but I'm not a fan of people submitting 10-20 reviews at a time. Whether they intend it as such or not, it seems like a ploy for attention, and honestly it works. Every day when I check MA I always click a handful of reviews to see what's up, what's hip, what's going on. I put a lot of stock into MA's review content because it's generally a great place to find what I should listen to and what I should avoid, but seeing one person dominate the queue gives off a smelly presence.

I love listening to many things and I love writing so I get it, and I don't think MA should impose any kind of limit or anything, that'd be dumb as hell. Just having an old man yells at cloud moment lol

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Derigin
The Mountain Man

Joined: Sun Jan 01, 2006 6:25 am
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Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Feb 10, 2020 8:41 am 
 

I wouldn't dwell on it too much. Most of the time it's just a reviewer dumping their stock from their personal blog.
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SweetLeaf95
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Dec 16, 2014 1:19 am
Posts: 868
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Feb 10, 2020 9:16 am 
 

KrigareTjovane wrote:
Not naming names because I have nothing against anyone in particular, but I'm not a fan of people submitting 10-20 reviews at a time.


I know exactly who you mean, and I've honestly started avoiding that reviewer for that reason, haha. Their style isn't bad but it's not unique enough for me to read 10 reviews in a row.
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BastardHead
Worse than Stalin

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PostPosted: Mon Feb 10, 2020 10:21 am 
 

The only time this was ever an "issue" was when autothrall first joined because his unending stream went on for years. Seriously he was dropping like twenty reviews a week for three solid years, easily eclipsed the 1000 review mark (which was the goal at the time when Noktorn and hells were both getting close) and breezed on to triple it without breaking a sweat thanks to his giant backlog. There was a lot of resentment towards him in 2011-2012 but thankfully that's mostly passed. I think people reflexively see people like that as a nuisance because they're outsiders who barge in and dump massive totals super quickly and blow the regulars in the community out of the water, but once the dust settles they're usually seen for what they are: good writers who just happen to be really prolific.
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Felix 1666
Metal newbie

Joined: Sun Jan 12, 2014 5:19 pm
Posts: 79
Location: Germany
PostPosted: Mon Feb 10, 2020 3:30 pm 
 

Chairthrower, feel free to link it as long as I do not need to get in contact with G.T. - guess she doesn't like me (and vice versa).

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CHAIRTHROWER
Methed-burnt rogue babelfish

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 565
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Tue Feb 11, 2020 12:07 am 
 

I'd rather link Angela Merkel with it...(*smirk*)!

About shoveling in reviews, it's no skin off my front, but I've often the sordid impression certain folks delight themselves in playing devil's' advocate with their %s (scores)...Oh, well, what can you do? (Guffawing is a good option, so is the wide-eyed, if not wry as Hell, French-from-France interjection for "Cripes!"

("Bigre!") [pronounced "bee-grrr!, not "bigger"...]

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gasmask_colostomy
Metalhead

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 11, 2020 1:37 am 
 

I know which serial reviewer we're talking about (he did the second-highest number of reviews last year according to Empath), but I don't find it a massive problem. I only read a few new reviews from each batch, depending which bands catch my eye. I guess it can be annoying if you think you've written something great and then the whole "Latest Reviews" column gets hogged. As for the Autothrall thing, that's super frustrating because the reviewers at the time were busting a gut to get to 1000, but I don't suppose he knew that. Personally, I find it boring to dump my magazine reviews all at once, and space them out over a couple of weeks.

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SweetLeaf95
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Dec 16, 2014 1:19 am
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Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue Feb 11, 2020 12:10 pm 
 

gasmask_colostomy wrote:
Personally, I find it boring to dump my magazine reviews all at once, and space them out over a couple of weeks.


Agree. But that's easy for me, because a lot of my 'zine reviews will be out before the release date, which you can't do here. So I could write three reviews in one week, and they'll make their way here at completely different times.

Also. Cosmic Mystery's Worm review is excellent. As someone fairly new to that style, his blotch about it not being for newcomers made perfect sense as well.
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tomcat_ha
Minister of Boiling Water

Joined: Fri Oct 27, 2006 8:05 am
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Location: Netherlands
PostPosted: Tue Feb 11, 2020 4:10 pm 
 

My problem with autothrall were his reviews that just gave off a strong vibe of "listened to this record twice in 1 week and now im writing about it". His best reviews are actually some of the best ones on the site.

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colin040
Metal freak

Joined: Sat Dec 08, 2007 6:00 pm
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Location: Netherlands
PostPosted: Tue Feb 11, 2020 4:52 pm 
 

My problem with him is that he's just so inconsistent. His detailed reviews really show he's talented, but his brief reviews just aren't that fun to read.

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Smoking_Gnu
Chicago Favorite

Joined: Sat Mar 15, 2008 11:22 pm
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PostPosted: Tue Feb 11, 2020 6:17 pm 
 

The only thing that ever bothered me was his habit of trashing best-of/compilation albums. Everyone already knows that streaming has made those redundant and pointless, I don't think anyone really needed a review as a reminder.
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TheMeh
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jun 24, 2014 10:18 pm
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PostPosted: Tue Feb 11, 2020 8:15 pm 
 

tomcat_ha wrote:
My problem with autothrall were his reviews that just gave off a strong vibe of "listened to this record twice in 1 week and now im writing about it". His best reviews are actually some of the best ones on the site.


I don't think I've ever read much of his reviews - would be lovely if you pointed me in the direction of his good ones.
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CHAIRTHROWER
Methed-burnt rogue babelfish

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
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Location: Canada
PostPosted: Tue Feb 11, 2020 10:03 pm 
 

Anyone else here resolutely dig Gutterscream's haymaking reviews? Granted, they beg to be read s-l-ow-l-y...

(Also, he's been absent for the past year or two, but innocuously slipped one in a couple of months ago. As a show of solidarity, whence I match his total - somewhere around 550 - will settle back and wait to see if such idiomacy on my behalf prods him back into [tr]action! Note: that's "idiomacy", not "idiocy"...)

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BastardHead
Worse than Stalin

Joined: Thu Aug 18, 2005 7:53 pm
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Location: St. Charles, Illinois
PostPosted: Tue Feb 11, 2020 11:01 pm 
 

TheMeh wrote:
tomcat_ha wrote:
My problem with autothrall were his reviews that just gave off a strong vibe of "listened to this record twice in 1 week and now im writing about it". His best reviews are actually some of the best ones on the site.


I don't think I've ever read much of his reviews - would be lovely if you pointed me in the direction of his good ones.


His Judas Priest ones always stood out as excellent. General rule of thumb is that if he's tackling a major artist he has more history with, he'll have something more interesting to say. His stuff for randos is very workmanlike and good but not exactly interesting, so you can really tell when he actually cares a lot about something.
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Cat III
Metal newbie

Joined: Fri Apr 21, 2017 11:44 am
Posts: 318
Location: United States
PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2020 12:01 am 
 

I was going to suggest his Autopsy reviews which I remembered being solid, but looking it up, I see he gave Shitfun a 40% and Mental Funeral an 88%!? Those two scores are a combined 62% lower than they ought to be.

Smoking_Gnu wrote:
The only thing that ever bothered me was his habit of trashing best-of/compilation albums. Everyone already knows that streaming has made those redundant and pointless, I don't think anyone really needed a review as a reminder.

He got his point across the first 10,000 times he wrote that review.
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CHAIRTHROWER
Methed-burnt rogue babelfish

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
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Location: Canada
PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2020 4:27 am 
 

Regarding autothrall, I rather dig his shorter work...(and no, I'm not interjecting, here, as devil's advocate).

Then again, maybe it's 'cos it balances me out, some!

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colin040
Metal freak

Joined: Sat Dec 08, 2007 6:00 pm
Posts: 5764
Location: Netherlands
PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2020 5:26 am 
 

That new Paradise Lost review by Absinthe1979 is an interesting one - I can see where he's coming from but at the same time I'm a little surprised he doesn't like the album, yet claims ''Beneath Broken Earth'' is PL's best song, which was pretty much the track that inspired this whole thing. The album is as doomy and heavy as PL with a huge emphasis on doomed out riffing instead of emotional choruses or contrasts between dark and light, even though I'd argue ''Fearless Sky'' and the title track feature both of these aspects.

Perhaps some more detailed explanations on why certain songs don't work out would give me a better understanding of this guy's point of view.

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SweetLeaf95
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Dec 16, 2014 1:19 am
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2020 2:49 pm 
 

tomcat_ha wrote:
"listened to this record twice in 1 week and now im writing about it"


What's wrong with doing that? I think it's pretty normal to get something new, listen to it a few times, and then review it. In fact, that's basically what promos are meant for.... Is everything you review supposed to be something you've heard over and over for long amounts of time?
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hells_unicorn
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 8:32 pm
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2020 4:53 pm 
 

BastardHead wrote:
The only time this was ever an "issue" was when autothrall first joined because his unending stream went on for years. Seriously he was dropping like twenty reviews a week for three solid years, easily eclipsed the 1000 review mark (which was the goal at the time when Noktorn and hells were both getting close) and breezed on to triple it without breaking a sweat thanks to his giant backlog. There was a lot of resentment towards him in 2011-2012 but thankfully that's mostly passed. I think people reflexively see people like that as a nuisance because they're outsiders who barge in and dump massive totals super quickly and blow the regulars in the community out of the water, but once the dust settles they're usually seen for what they are: good writers who just happen to be really prolific.


I didn't really mind it at first, but some of his lesser known thrash metal album reviews were bordering on Amazon.com material in terms of how short and generalized they were, I think a few people mentioned this at the time and started ripping on him specifically because of it. One thing to correct the record, I actually broke the 1,000 review mark a little bit before autothrall did, but after 2012 he had basically left all of us way behind and I was struggling to just barely keep him from doubling my total for a while. lol
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BastardHead
Worse than Stalin

Joined: Thu Aug 18, 2005 7:53 pm
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2020 10:22 pm 
 

SweetLeaf95 wrote:
tomcat_ha wrote:
"listened to this record twice in 1 week and now im writing about it"


What's wrong with doing that? I think it's pretty normal to get something new, listen to it a few times, and then review it. In fact, that's basically what promos are meant for.... Is everything you review supposed to be something you've heard over and over for long amounts of time?


I remember when I first really started circa 07/08 it was really common for people to say they would only review things after a dozen listens or so. It made sense to me at the time since I was mostly reviewing classics at the time but somebody (probably caspian) basically responded with a "lol shut up nerds" and suddenly it became obvious to me that you don't need to listen to something obviously terrible twenty fuckin' times in order to know it sucks.

Basically the more I hate something, the less I listen to it. Almost all of my negative reviews are based on like three listens tops.
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Empyreal
The Final Frontier

Joined: Thu Nov 30, 2006 6:58 pm
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PostPosted: Wed Feb 12, 2020 11:41 pm 
 

I can pretty much tell if something is bad after a listen or two now - it's pretty clear, most of the time, what will grow on me and what won't. If it's evident it won't then I'll review it quickly to save myself the suffering.
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Cat III
Metal newbie

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PostPosted: Thu Feb 13, 2020 12:22 am 
 

However many times a reviewer listens to an album, I think at least one of those listens should be attentive without any distractions. If you listen while writing or doing other activities, it's easy to overlook (overlisten?) subtleties in the music.
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gasmask_colostomy
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 13, 2020 2:46 am 
 

colin040 wrote:
That new Paradise Lost review by Absinthe1979 is an interesting one - I can see where he's coming from but at the same time I'm a little surprised he doesn't like the album, yet claims ''Beneath Broken Earth'' is PL's best song, which was pretty much the track that inspired this whole thing. The album is as doomy and heavy as PL with a huge emphasis on doomed out riffing instead of emotional choruses or contrasts between dark and light, even though I'd argue ''Fearless Sky'' and the title track feature both of these aspects.

Perhaps some more detailed explanations on why certain songs don't work out would give me a better understanding of this guy's point of view.

Actually, Absinthe1979 is basically doing similar rounds to my first reviews. It's nice when someone comes quite fresh to the site and gives their opinion without being influenced by the previous reviews. He knows the albums well, and that's important, even though I haven't agreed with many of his views. Giving Like Gods of the Sun more than 90% - really?

As for listening to bad/good albums before review, I tend to make myself listen 3 times. If it's something I'm on the fence about, I might listen the 4th or 5th time too. Generally speaking, I find the most intense listening I'm doing is while I'm reviewing, because I'm listening very actively to see where the quality is.
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Twisted_Psychology
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 13, 2020 9:22 am 
 

I listen once for quality, twice for style, and three to five for nuance depending on how badly I want to talk about the album. I also try to balance how I feel about the album at present versus how I will in the future, but that's a lot trickier to truly consider.
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SweetLeaf95
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 13, 2020 1:16 pm 
 

Cat III wrote:
However many times a reviewer listens to an album, I think at least one of those listens should be attentive without any distractions.


Definitely. My first listen is ALWAYS without taking any notes or anything, just to get a feel for it. Second listen I may draft some thoughts. Third listen is usually when I'll put it all together.
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CHAIRTHROWER
Methed-burnt rogue babelfish

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
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Location: Canada
PostPosted: Thu Feb 13, 2020 2:03 pm 
 

Nice Lazy (Boy) review, sleaf;

particularly dug the "sun-in-yer-eyes-whence-wakin'-n-bed" analogy...

Will sample here as I leisurely frolic in the rain.

(not to toot horn - OK, just a tad - but find you'll procure jollies out of my most ribald review yet, for the Order's 1986)

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hells_unicorn
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 8:32 pm
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 13, 2020 2:24 pm 
 

SweetLeaf95 wrote:
tomcat_ha wrote:
"listened to this record twice in 1 week and now im writing about it"


What's wrong with doing that? I think it's pretty normal to get something new, listen to it a few times, and then review it. In fact, that's basically what promos are meant for.... Is everything you review supposed to be something you've heard over and over for long amounts of time?


I don't think it's the number of times that is at issue, but more so the lack of descriptive content that gives off the vibe that the person didn't really seriously listen to the album and is just sort of filling space with tangential thoughts. Most of my reviews of newer albums that are published on an outside webzine involve 2-3 listens tops due to time constraints, and my reviewing formula kinda changes as a result of that. Nevertheless, I have to have the album on while reviewing just to make sure I'm not screwing up any specific descriptions I'm giving (like calling a fast song mid-paced or complementing a ballad on it's heavy riffs lol), and if I'm already familiar with the band I can usually sneak in some commentary on previous albums as a basis of comparison.

BastardHead wrote:
I remember when I first really started circa 07/08 it was really common for people to say they would only review things after a dozen listens or so. It made sense to me at the time since I was mostly reviewing classics at the time but somebody (probably caspian) basically responded with a "lol shut up nerds" and suddenly it became obvious to me that you don't need to listen to something obviously terrible twenty fuckin' times in order to know it sucks.

Basically the more I hate something, the less I listen to it. Almost all of my negative reviews are based on like three listens tops.


I was in a similar mindset back in my early days as a reviewer, I tended to only review my favorite albums from my personal collection (which I'd heard 50 or 60 times) and usually caught a bit of flack for my scores being disproportionately high. When I tried to write more negative stuff, good old Caspian was busting my balls about railing against obvious targets. I tend not to hate most of the stuff I hear, but if I do hate something, I'll probably only give it a couple listens. There are some classic turds like Sepultura's Roots and Machine Head's The More Things Change that I've heard a couple dozen times because of being in bands with people who ate that stuff up at the time, but for the most part, I've never heard an album more than 3 times that got a score below a 50.
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BastardHead
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 13, 2020 3:06 pm 
 

Yeah I'll agree that the only hard and fast rule I have about listening/reviewing is that I need to be listening to the album as I review it for the exact reason hells mentioned. Maybe I won't need to if it's an obvious classic I've been listening to my entire life like classic Sabbath or something but even then I'll probably do it just because I like it. It varies a lot, I listened to Idle Hands's debut nearly every week for six months before reviewing it and some promos I'll start writing introductory paragraphs halfway through a first listen. Really depends on how easily a feel a certain way about it.

Obligatory disclaimer that newbies should never take pointers from me.
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SweetLeaf95
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Dec 16, 2014 1:19 am
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 13, 2020 5:45 pm 
 

Chairs, Cheer! I mean.... cheers, Chair!
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CHAIRTHROWER
Methed-burnt rogue babelfish

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
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Location: Canada
PostPosted: Thu Feb 13, 2020 6:43 pm 
 

I'm nearing my 50th War Dogs_Die By Sword listen...and still dig it like a truffle shnuffling piglet (wigglett)

(to say that you know an album warrants perfect score, under such excessive, but conducive, conditions...Whereas I never even fully listened to The Order's 1986...(for shame!)

Any one out there also flummoxed whence trying to review a long-ago, once possessed album strictly out of musical memory?!

Not an easy feat...I was so excited when some sly Ohio minstrel tube-fed Boulder's Reaped In Half last Summer, only to nix it (down) about two weeks later. (Just as I was settling into my second paragraph. Suffice it to say, I cursed a mean blue streak at the VPL, to the point of rousing security's concern...(I actually explained my dilemma, for which they sympathised, albeit wryly, along with token demand I tone it down a decibel or 100...).

I'd say, three listens minimum, but really, try this: listen to something you really dig 5 times in a row (or 20 total over a few days) and I guarantee, your enthusiasm and subconscience, along with some other sylphlike factor, perhaps (only the metal Gods know and jealously guard the secret!), will entail the review writing itself.

Also figured this was pretty funny, a little "imbroglio", here, if you will, regarding trollage:

https://www.metal-archives.com/report/v ... 7/show/all

And, just wondering, how come our personal review totals fluctuate minutely like it just did mine by one (1)? I'm not having a fit or throwing things - only chair - but am stumped and baffled. I know I haven't erased any of late, and the discrepancy occurred overnight. Sorry to sound petty like this but any light shed on this would be jesper...

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TheMeh
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jun 24, 2014 10:18 pm
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PostPosted: Fri Feb 14, 2020 4:58 pm 
 

I admire and despise this review so much. It feels so sparse on details, but the generality of it and the whole point just being right there... it's honestly surprising that I admire it as much as I do. https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... atrix/4221
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hells_unicorn
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PostPosted: Fri Feb 14, 2020 8:43 pm 
 

TheMeh wrote:
I admire and despise this review so much. It feels so sparse on details, but the generality of it and the whole point just being right there... it's honestly surprising that I admire it as much as I do. https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... atrix/4221


I actually had no idea that natrix was still writing reviews as recently as this, I thought he left sometime before the end of 2009. He tends to be pretty sparse on details, his style hasn't really changed that much since he started back in 2003, though he does do an ample job of describing why that album was a step up from the crap that preceded it. I'm not quite as in love with Queensryche's first album with La Torre as he was, I believe they truly got into their groove when they put out Conditional Human, but there was a massive improvement that took place between Dedicated To Chaos and the s/t, and when looking at the solo output from Tate since, it was pretty clear that he was the problem.
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CHAIRTHROWER
Methed-burnt rogue babelfish

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
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Location: Canada
PostPosted: Sun Feb 16, 2020 1:43 am 
 

Swleaf (try that on for syze), after gleaning both your Sacred Widundret 'views, am compelled to wax eerie and flavorful on some of the Windy City knave's cantakerous, oh-so-vocally reedy (sold) soulminations...urf! Good shit! Unduly underrated, duly!

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SweetLeaf95
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Dec 16, 2014 1:19 am
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 17, 2020 12:04 pm 
 

CHAIRTHROWER wrote:
Sacred Widundret 'views


My what??? Lol
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CHAIRTHROWER
Methed-burnt rogue babelfish

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 565
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Feb 17, 2020 1:03 pm 
 

Shit! ...just noticed I accidently posted a draft for Sacred Monster still in the works, like a bobo-knave...will have to get on that, duly.

(I got distracted cause my retard neighbor's threw a fit of the ages accusing me of robbing his cellphones, which I did not. And why two phones>?! What a tool...)

btw leaph, widundret, you know, monster in swedish, it's common knowledge (isn't it?)

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