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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9275
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Wed Apr 22, 2015 5:31 pm 
 
Good catch thrashmaniac, let me delete that and ban his sock puppet accounts.
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm
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Grave_Wyrm
Metal Sloth

Joined: Sun Mar 04, 2012 5:55 pm
Posts: 3928
PostPosted: Wed Apr 22, 2015 6:51 pm 
 
Empyreal wrote:
steaming at the forehead mad

:lol:

What's a Havoc Boy? Abs or not, he will eventually get to the point where he's shitting himself and cruelly prevented from ever getting a boner again. Hope he's ready for that realness.
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Bigotry is a mental health issue.
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Wilytank
Not a Flying Toy

Joined: Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:21 am
Posts: 5865
Location: 717
PostPosted: Tue Apr 28, 2015 5:18 pm 
 
Diamhea wrote:
Just a followup to that, I sent him an email letting him know that he was banned, basically cutting the mic on him early, but he wasn't having it:

Spoiler: show
Actually, I know plenty about old school death metal, and why would you be
on a site when you don't even listen to metal, dumbfuck? I don't care about
getting banned, I wasn't going to use that site anyway anymore since I
don't want to write a review that's ten fucking pages long like you hoped.
You're not kicking anyone's ass here, loser. The only one who has "nothing"
is your sorry old ass. An lonely old man with saggy tits and a beer belly
wants to take on a Havoc Boy with ripped abs and a busty fiancée sucking
his dick every night? Come up to me at a show and I swear I will not
hesitate to put a bullet in your head during the middle of the fucking
show, faggot. No, what bothers me is that it's annoying you seem to think
you've put me in my place. I'm just accepting your offer to fight me,
life-lover. Death metal is for people who can kill, not tame motherfuckers
like you.


He thinks I am old, fat, out of shape, and afraid of DEATH METAL fans, I guess he doesn't realize that metalheads are purveyors of the most empty threats of all time.


Did you ask him/her what's emo about sacrificial vaginas? I'm genuinely curious. :lol:
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Rosenthorn
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Dec 11, 2013 8:51 pm
Posts: 535
Location: United States
PostPosted: Thu Apr 30, 2015 9:49 am 
 
Getting acquainted with this site, this thread gave me the most laughs out of anything I've so far seen. It's also given me some insight into what to avoid at ALL COSTS when writing a review.

I must say, this one has got to be my favorite:

Diamhea wrote:
Spoiler: show
Image


It's really incredible that someone took the time to write a good block of text consisting of nothing but a basic synopsis of the band, some clichéd metal adjectives and a huge amount of swearing and thought it would pass muster as a substantive review.

Very fucking demonic fucking brutal fucking sick!
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CAAdhAcC wrote:
I like this music, which is good. but the dolphin did not want that. dolphin say no, they say: no for you.

Obey the dolphin!
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JohnTheDrummer
Metalhead

Joined: Sat May 12, 2007 2:25 pm
Posts: 590
PostPosted: Fri May 01, 2015 12:39 pm 
 
..... I've never actually read that one... wow :lol:
Aside from the final sentence I believe he said "Fuck" at least twice in every fucking shitty sentence.
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Subrick
Metal Strongman

Joined: Sun Sep 12, 2010 7:27 pm
Posts: 10167
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri May 01, 2015 12:59 pm 
 
Did Corey Taylor write that review?
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Earthcubed wrote:
I'm just perpetually annoyed by Sean William Scott and he's never been in a movie where I wasn't rooting for his head to sever by strange means.

Blacksoul Seraphim Gothic Doom Metal
Autumn's Ashes Melodic Death/Doom Metal
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Wilytank
Not a Flying Toy

Joined: Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:21 am
Posts: 5865
Location: 717
PostPosted: Fri May 01, 2015 1:49 pm 
 
A necessary shit? I'd like to thing every shit is necessary.
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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9275
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Sat May 02, 2015 12:03 am 
 
Spoiler: show
Image
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm
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Grave_Wyrm
Metal Sloth

Joined: Sun Mar 04, 2012 5:55 pm
Posts: 3928
PostPosted: Sat May 02, 2015 12:09 am 
 
balls tight but really feeling.

Paging MutantClannFear
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Metantoine
Slave to Santa

Joined: Sat Jun 21, 2008 5:00 pm
Posts: 12030
Location: Montréal
PostPosted: Sat May 02, 2015 1:18 pm 
 
This guy has never heard QOTSA.

Spoiler: show
About a year ago, after hearing all the horrible, terrible things about this album, I thought I'd hop onto youtube and give it a listen for myself. I did a track by track review in the comments, so I thought I'd share it here:

Omni Potens - Sounds like a level from Doom. Also at 2:05 I was expecting to hear Ace Ventura at the end with "-righty then"

Too Extreme - Opening sounds fucking awful, then it turns into a Michael Jackson song, right before it becomes a bastard lovechild of Deathstars and Dimmu Borgir. Oh yes, and that goddamn pneumatic drill machine-like rhythm is just HORRIBLE!!

Existo Vulgore - This sounds more like the Morbid Angel we all know and love

Blades for Baal - If it wasn't for the crisp and clean production, I reckon this could have fit nicely onto 'Gateways to Annihilation'

I Am Morbid - This sounds like Morbid Angel trying to imitate Hatebreed

10 More Dead - Did Max Cavalera write half of this one?

Destructos vs. the Earth-Attack - When did Static X reform?

Nevermore - The opening reminded me of The Berzerker. But overall, this is a good track, apart from the boring chorus.

Beauty Meets The Beast - The music is decent, but the lyrics are lazy. It's the kind of stuff I would have written when I was 15

Radikult - This is what happens when a Death Metal band gets stoned out of their trees and listens to Queens of the Stoneage

Mea Culpa - The intro had me waiting for the anime style mechs to fly into the sky at any second. The rest of this sounds like a Berzerker remix track.


Overall, yes, this is an awful, terrible album. It's just bad. And Morbid Angel should feel bad for making it. And Terrorizer should feel bad for giving it 9/10 (denial much?)

Who do I complain to to get the last hour of my life back?
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caspian about CHAIRTHROWER wrote:
?????????

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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9275
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Tue May 05, 2015 2:09 am 
 
Spoiler: show
Image
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm
Top
 Profile  
Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9275
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Tue May 05, 2015 3:26 pm 
 
Spoiler: show
Image


Spoiler: show
Image
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm
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Wilytank
Not a Flying Toy

Joined: Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:21 am
Posts: 5865
Location: 717
PostPosted: Tue May 05, 2015 5:50 pm 
 
If the drums are never noise, does that mean the drums are totally inaudible?
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Subrick
Metal Strongman

Joined: Sun Sep 12, 2010 7:27 pm
Posts: 10167
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue May 05, 2015 6:42 pm 
 
Only if you're playing on an unplugged electronic kit.
_________________
Earthcubed wrote:
I'm just perpetually annoyed by Sean William Scott and he's never been in a movie where I wasn't rooting for his head to sever by strange means.

Blacksoul Seraphim Gothic Doom Metal
Autumn's Ashes Melodic Death/Doom Metal
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Turner
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Aug 23, 2002 2:04 am
Posts: 2247
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Tue May 05, 2015 8:31 pm 
 
there's an idea for an april fools' prank (well not any more, but hey): save all these duds into some "wait for it" queue then april 1, swap the "normal reviews" queue for the "wait for it queue" and BAM! 10000000000 reviews in bad spang/russo-english
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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9275
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Sat May 09, 2015 3:00 am 
 
Spoiler: show
Image
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm
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Zelkiiro
Pounding the world with a fish of steel

Joined: Sat Apr 18, 2009 5:30 pm
Posts: 7731
Location: Pennsylvania
PostPosted: Sat May 09, 2015 9:11 am 
 
Sounds like a pretty boring and terrible album.
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I've written a fantasy novel. It's 145,000 157,586 184,899 words long!
It's also going to be the first part of a trilogy!
Currently seeking an agent willing to touch this massive doorstop.
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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9275
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Sun May 10, 2015 2:48 am 
 
Four words and he still managed to fit in grammar errors.

Spoiler: show
Image
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm
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Brainded Binky
Metal newbie

Joined: Thu Oct 17, 2013 5:51 pm
Posts: 373
Location: Minnesota
PostPosted: Tue May 12, 2015 1:01 pm 
 
Sabbath at its best. That's it? Is this some kind of a joke? If that's the case, April Fool's was over a month ago, buddy, sorry.
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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9275
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Tue May 12, 2015 3:48 pm 
 
Spoiler: show
Image
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm
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Emptiness Cycle
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Apr 13, 2015 11:07 am
Posts: 417
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Tue May 12, 2015 4:09 pm 
 
Hahah! I feel better for you rejecting mine. In comparison I wrote "Of Mice and Men". XD
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Sweetie
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Dec 16, 2014 1:19 am
Posts: 1091
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue May 12, 2015 5:01 pm 
 
I love how people's opinions makes them "fucking twats".
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"It's not the kill, it's the thrill of the chase" - Deep Purple
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Turner
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Aug 23, 2002 2:04 am
Posts: 2247
Location: Australia
PostPosted: Tue May 12, 2015 6:28 pm 
 
haha that's obviously trolling....i hope
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Sweetie
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Dec 16, 2014 1:19 am
Posts: 1091
Location: United States
PostPosted: Tue May 12, 2015 10:59 pm 
 
Might I ask, what is trolling?
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"It's not the kill, it's the thrill of the chase" - Deep Purple
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Rykov
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Jun 03, 2013 11:52 pm
Posts: 454
PostPosted: Fri May 15, 2015 2:56 am 
 
The Semitic Defilement? That's too precious, it's got to be trolling.
_________________
Acrobat wrote:
I MAKE A SPIT IN THE FACE OF ANTHRAX!

mastamonkeynutz wrote:
Also if you want to make a joke please do so but please put lol after so I can know that Fred Durst isn't really dead.
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Brainded Binky
Metal newbie

Joined: Thu Oct 17, 2013 5:51 pm
Posts: 373
Location: Minnesota
PostPosted: Fri May 15, 2015 10:57 pm 
 
Add Suicide Silence to this website???? Never in a million years!
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MutantClannfear
Blank Czech

Joined: Thu May 27, 2010 12:12 am
Posts: 3624
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri May 15, 2015 11:05 pm 
 
You know they were here like six years ago, right?
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Korpgud wrote:
Imagine Texas Chainsaw Massacre but without any suspense, only constant chainsawing.
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Grave_Wyrm
Metal Sloth

Joined: Sun Mar 04, 2012 5:55 pm
Posts: 3928
PostPosted: Sat May 16, 2015 6:26 pm 
 
SweetLeaf95 wrote:
Might I ask, what is trolling?

If you know what trolling is and you're pretending that you don't so that you can have some masturbatory yuks at the expense of the unsuspecting, that's trolling.

Provided you're actually asking: it has a few uses, but generally speaking it's the use of a disingenuous ploy for the purposes of personal amusement. Saying shit you don't actually mean in order to get a rise out of someone. One who intentionally makes it difficult for anyone to know whether or not one is joking is a species of troll. Internet phishing is also trolling. There are other uses, but this is how I understand it.
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droneriot
cisgender

Joined: Sat Aug 28, 2004 1:17 pm
Posts: 10812
Location: Spahn Ranch
PostPosted: Sat May 16, 2015 8:11 pm 
 
Rykov wrote:
The Semitic Defilement? That's too precious, it's got to be trolling.

It's their little-known collaboration with Arghoslent.
_________________
Spoiler: show
Clicking on spoiler tags in signatures means you seriously need a hobby.

https://conservativetentacles.bandcamp.com/
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Brainded Binky
Metal newbie

Joined: Thu Oct 17, 2013 5:51 pm
Posts: 373
Location: Minnesota
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2015 5:32 pm 
 
MutantClannfear wrote:
You know they were here like six years ago, right?

Really? Suicide Silence on MA? Well, I'm glad they're not here anymore!
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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9275
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2015 5:38 pm 
 
Spoiler: show
Image
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm
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droneriot
cisgender

Joined: Sat Aug 28, 2004 1:17 pm
Posts: 10812
Location: Spahn Ranch
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2015 5:50 pm 
 
Well, the tiny icon for writing a review is obviously much easier to find than the big button for writing a report.
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Spoiler: show
Clicking on spoiler tags in signatures means you seriously need a hobby.

https://conservativetentacles.bandcamp.com/
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Wilytank
Not a Flying Toy

Joined: Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:21 am
Posts: 5865
Location: 717
PostPosted: Sun May 17, 2015 7:13 pm 
 
I'm just glad they don't use that same logic with the band genre debates, and for that we thank you.
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Azmodes
Ultranaut

Joined: Fri Nov 02, 2007 10:44 am
Posts: 11198
Location: Ob der Enns, Austria
PostPosted: Mon May 18, 2015 8:25 am 
 
Still preferable to bands updating their page's additional notes with stuff like "actually we play POGRESIVE GRINDGORE METAL; plz change it!!!!" or "this is not a proper release, but MA refuses to delete it".
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The band research thread needs your help! → Full research list || Stuff for sale on Discogs
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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9275
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Mon May 25, 2015 8:16 am 
 
Spoiler: show
Image
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm
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Grave_Wyrm
Metal Sloth

Joined: Sun Mar 04, 2012 5:55 pm
Posts: 3928
PostPosted: Mon May 25, 2015 2:31 pm 
 
lyricses ..

:|

It's weird. It's like this guy records himself talking about the album, and then transcribes the dictation without looking at the keyboard and then submits without looking at what he typed (he couln't give a f**k!).
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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9275
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Mon May 25, 2015 10:27 pm 
 
Spoiler: show
Image
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm
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MDL
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Sep 11, 2014 2:12 pm
Posts: 949
Location: Unknown
PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2015 4:40 pm 
 
Diamhea wrote:
Spoiler: show
Image

I wonder if anyone had ever mistaken a bass for a trumpet.
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Wilytank
Not a Flying Toy

Joined: Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:21 am
Posts: 5865
Location: 717
PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2015 5:48 pm 
 
MDL666 wrote:
Diamhea wrote:
Spoiler: show
Image

I wonder if anyone had ever mistaken a bass for a trumpet.

To be fair, I almost mistook the guitar in this Master's Hammer song for a saxophone. https://youtu.be/O-MpV5EAnJs?t=58s
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Diamhea
Eats and Spits Corpses

Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2007 7:46 pm
Posts: 9275
Location: At the Heat of Winter
PostPosted: Tue May 26, 2015 10:10 pm 
 
Spoiler: show
Image
_________________
nuclearskull wrote:
Leave a steaming, stinking Rotting Repulsive Rotting Corpse = LIVE YOUNG - DIE FREE and move on to the NEXT form of yourself....or just be a fat Wal-Mart Mcdonalds pc of shit what do I give a fuck what you do.

Last.fm
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