Haha, it was the people, not the title, after all. But it should at least result in a decrease in such posts.

Review for Mortician (US)'s Chainsaw Dismemberment

A must for the sick - 85%
Written by Oldenthald on April 2nd, 2008

Bought this album today, and I am happy I did.
The album art is a bit gory but not too much, just a leg cutted off and some blood.
This is the most brutal CD I ever heard, it can't get lower than this.
The drum machine is playing lightspeed all the time, Will is making evil noise, and on almost every song there is a horror movie intro.

If you are into brutal death metal with gory, bloody lyrics, you have to buy this album.

A doozy for Aras - Depressive Rebellion

Depressive Rebellion - 90%
Written by misty_graveyard on April 1st, 2008

The Aras band released his forth album recently by the name of "Depressive Rebellion". Undoubtedly, this album is pithy and made stronger than before with different structure. At last album of Aras we can find a person who is rebel and who wants to change and shakeup. He is standing in front of a lot of pains and he doesn?t know why! He perches in an endless way. The way drives him into solitude, into absurdity; and he stays in an inept and inconclusive struggle. The more he goes in that way the more he finds that he is drowning in darkness; so he quit the struggle. In the corner of his mind, he buries all of his past. He thinks about his philosophy, thinks about his fought with him and then he gets the DEPRESSIVE REBELLION. Aras played growing in cage, played the treason and finally played unsociability in the shape of Depressive Rebellion. This album is intelligence and the structure of new album of Aras towards previous albums such as "The Epic of Grief ", "The Slaughterer of Freedom" and ? completely explanatory the authority of this album. Aras used the instruments like Tambour, Daf and also used Drums, Guitar, Bass, French horn and Choral appending a special beauty to this album. Depressive Rebellion is a fantastic work that recorded by Aras and we can call this album is the best album of Iranian's Black Metal.
By Deineath

-
A good effort though.

I feel almost like there's a deeper meaning to that review. Some sort of avant-garde significance lurking just beyond my mortal grasp...

For Deathcamp Project's End

Deathcamp Project - End - 100%
Written by TheKamael on April 3rd, 2008

Û

--------------

A U with a hat on?

Admittedly, it does sound like he was trying to muster up something esoteric and reflective with that review.

look here:
http://www.metal-archives.com/band.php?id=47806

That's the worst misfired report ever.

Review for Absurd (Ger)'s Blutgericht


An absolute expression of willful madness! - 100%
Written by Mr_Frued on April 3rd, 2008

This said, in the most colloquial sense of perfection: ‘brilliant!’ Especially track 9 with (lalalalalalalala) – Viking roots are definitive here!



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Review for Master (Rus)'s Master

??????-??? ?????!!! - 100%
Written by IgorekMetallist on April 5th, 2008

?? ??? ?????? ??? ????? ?????? ?????? "???????" ?? ??? ??? ???????.

What a read!

For Violator (Bra) - Violent Mosh

Thrash Maniacs - 90%
Written by killhead on April 6th, 2008

Violator in this ep violent mosh shows that is not for commercial games, this ep is so incredible that you wish to put this ep over and over again.

We begin with a theme that is called let the violation begins which is a very good name is so good that you will not know what awaits you at the next track, are quick to riff, oldest school dug a voice of sacrifice (Canada), then is a track called thrash maniac and another called artillery attack the first (thrash maniac) is incredibly good drumsthat do't stop... Choral style exodus, and then comes the best track for me artillery attack this incredible feeling that riff when shouts artillery war! Fantastic is the rest of the ep is very good I recommend that you listen to this ep because frankly is impressive and you should get it beacause is an obligation

It's almost like he put together a review out of typical South American broken English lyrics.

QUICK TO RIFF
VIOLENT MOSH
I AM THRASH MANIAC
RIFF SHOUTS ARTILLERY WAR

LET THE VIOLATION BEGINS

Oh the lol's

Lalalalalalalala is most definitely Viking back me up on this guys!

Review for Amon Amarth's With Oden on Our Side

How? - 90%
Written by Valerus on April 13th, 2008

How do they do this?

This album is...err...yeah. Epic as fuck.

Get this if you want to kill people with axes.

:lol::lol: Pure brilliance people!

Something about Coffin Birth's The Miracle Of Death, or is it about their label?

Garbage - 0%
Written by SoliderOfDarkness on April 13th, 2008

This album was pure shit. So is the label there on. Have you heard this guy's bands? I bought an album off e-bay and got ripped off badly. Wasn't worth the what 10 bucks I paid for it... Do yourself a favour and avoid "BleakArtsRecords" his label is pure shit.

The theme is Black Metal for the band yet the band name is Death Metal? Hmm, right... Also, the thrashy riffs sound like a cheesy version of Metallica... Nothing about this band makes sense and the music is poor. I have to give it a zero.

The guy from BAR is just a moron... He signs any band he can too get a nickle and then spams internet sites trying to force these crappy bands down people's throats.

For Gillman's 30 Años de Rock Nacional:

That sounds like he intended it to be a promotional blurb.

I think he just couldn't figure out how to update the additional notes. As it is, there's a fragment reading "This box collection" for that release.

Review for As I Lay Dying
???????????...Unbelieveable - 0%
Written by ariskwolf on April 19th, 2008

When I tried to look for classic metal bands such as Led Zeppelin and so on, I read in the policy that they are hard rock and not metal which is fine and totally understandable they say "they are not metal enough", After that I started looking this page as a serious true metal place ( Pretty complete I may add), Then for some reason I discovered this page of this band, why is this band here, you might not like what Im writting and probably you are not going to post this, but please, just let's try to keep this website free of garbage because this band is garbage, they think this is "metal enough" they are metalcore!. and if you want metalcore scene join a really good metal one, then you are making a huge mistake.

what was that a review for?

As I Lay Dying, I do not remember the album anymore.

A review for C-187's Collision

What The Fuck??? - 0%
Written by chainsawcarnage on April 20th, 2008

What the fuck???, thats what i said after listening this whole piece of crap, since the first time i saw the names: Patrick Mameli, Tony Choy and Sean Reinert i was thinking that this album it was gonna a masterpiece, another legendary album like "Piece of Time", "Elements", "Focus"...well...IS NOT.
The whole album is the same crap, groovy guitars and no interesant riffs (boring and stupid), the drums sound like played by a 5 year old kid who doesnt know how to clean his ass, the bass?...is there bass on this record?, the vocals are the worst shit i've ever heard in my life, they're like a fred durst and chuck billy bad combination. I would qualify this as "Nu Metal" and a complete sell out by the members.

Never buy this album or even download it, never...trust me you'll be disappointed.

One for S.D.I.'s Sign of the Wicked

:G!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - 95%
Written by Wartender on April 21st, 2008

Wow!, a very thrash albukm, really!
It's very intresting, speacially when it begins , S.D.I. Megamosh!, And we can notice the sound, only True!
Keep That Way!

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It's amazing he got the contraction 'it's' right, though he did have a 50% chance.

One for Wolfsthron's Isegrim

to split-up was the best idea that they ever had.. - 1%
Written by ivenstein on April 21st, 2008

this is the bigest bullshit i have ever heard!
the sound is devastating: the guitar is to flashy and shrill, the drummer had no bassdrum - you can only hear the snare, and i think it was the first time that the guitar player played guitar!!!
it's not necessary to check out this snafu stuff!
the 1 point i give is for the good photo on the cd.

:G!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You sure seem to luck out a lot with this GS.

..."the 1 point i give is for the good photo on the cd." - Gold.

A blurb for Born of Osiris's The New Reign that in 'no way', shape, or form is getting on this site.

no way - 99%
Written by isk8andplay on April 24th, 2008


this band is insane, its just an amazing sound you cant imitate. i play guitar and i bet shit like this is hard as fuck to make. so instead of ripping on this band get a life and make something better. untill then your just two hands attatched to a failure typing away. if they wanted people to ripp on their shit they would have don3 a country album. stfu

One for Animosity (US)'s Get Off My Back

Obscure and ehhhhh - 50%
Written by TheCreeper on April 24th, 2008

I bought this LP at a thrash show back in 1990. Local thrash shows were rampant back in 1987-1991 in my state of CT and there was this guy who had EVERYTHING. We called him the flea market of thrash. Anyway at that time he made me buy this LP. Well i remember listening to it only a handful of times and just revisited it. Its what I like to call 'street thrash'. Low budget, decent quality music. Recording isn't the best. But there were a few riffs that made me want to start an old school pit. The lyrics are not to be taken seriously at all. This is more of a "fun" band. If you are into obscure thrash then seek this out if not skip it. It didn't leave an impression in 1990 it probably won't today (2008).

That cliche annoys me so much. "You can't play guitar like Yngwie, so you're not allowed to talk shit about his albums!"

Gutterscream (and other mods): Whenever you see something of the flavor of that isk8andplay review, go ahead and mention the author in the HQ, so that I can Durst him/her/it.

Review for Metallica's Master of Puppets

Great Album!! - 100%
Written by Sismico on April 24th, 2008

I think that is 1 of the most important Heavy Metal Albums in all history, haev a good liryc content and good music.

It would be interesting to see just how many reviews MOP would have if every one of them got accepted.

My pleasure.

For Elvenking's The Scythe

this was fantastic you stupid fucking twits - 100%
Written by tigs6969 on April 26th, 2008

ok i love elvenking. one of my fave bands. but wtf are you all smoking? so they put more screams in it WAA WAA WAA. look they changed their style and thats their choice and i know not everyone is happy but ffs calling this powercore O_O. holy shit. ok i do listen to metalcore yes i admit it but calling this album power metal with metalcore vocals is just completely stupid and.... no just stupid. fantastic album, fantastic change and i hope they make more kick ass albums like this. the scythe is my fave song by them and also one of my fave ever.
powercore XD bunch of twits you all are

What the hell is wrong with people today? It may not be as bad as previous ones, but damn this guy's first language is English! There's not a single sentence that starts with capital letters and way too many periods.

Reviews for Assassin (Ger)'s The Upcoming Terror

Bullets! - 82%
Written by Maniac456 on April 27th, 2008

They're aggressive and every song on here is fast, angry, and most of all evil. All the album is extremely fast. The first time I heard this album, I was in surprised what this band made in this album, the concept, the lyrics, the riffs, everything. I can´t select the highlights here cause all the tracks are perfect, but for me if a can find a hymn here is “Bullets”. If you're a fan of very aggressive thrash, then by all means get this album.

Review for Horde's Hellig Usvart:
Unblack, yet so black - 100%
Written by K666T666 on April 28th, 2008

As an atheist I used to laugh at band like these, wannabe-BM bands spreading the plague of christianity.

But this band has something...

Musically this is much darker and rawer than most of the BM recordings I've heard. To be honest, the christianity made me interested about this album and this fabulous band. Along with the God's word this album speeds 'till the with rawness unreachable for most. So raw, yet so clear. White metal at it's best. Fuck you, satanists.

I recommend this even for the most nihilistic extreme BM fanatics and church burners, it is nice to hear what you try to destroy and burn.

Review for Arsis - We Are the Nightmare:

Their best nightmare - 89%
Written by Lifeforms on April 27th, 2008

ARSIS – We are the nightmare


THEIR BEST NIGHTMARE
89/100



I do not know you, but I already I chose who it will go to occupy the first positions in the listing of yearend, for the title of best album 2008. Surely between of these a position ensured if the new job is clipped it registered Arsis, We are the Nightmare. How we quite know, the American combo a death proposes us funereal metal, from the high technical rate, excellently performed and melodic to the just point.


With large pleasure for all we find these everything features also in this last work of the band, everything excited from a super production. Ten irreversible tracks, ten ready mines to explode, ten lessons of technique and flavour for the musical composition.

All of the components are in big shape, feeling perceptible from every track. The guitars constantly are pledged in valuable solos, you interweave and very original riff and involving, that remember in usual manner the death metal more technician and that more classic (and in some cases, also death purely Swedish metal). It is left immediately with three pieces without compromises and very exciting: the title track, Shattering the Spell and Sightless Wisdom.

Three them, three tracks that other groups would not have been dreamt ever of to do. Best the riff (in order not to talk about the solos), complicated but plainly comprehensible the rhythmic section and always recognizable the scream of Malone. In the complex one an excellent opening. It is continued to the large one with the most attractive piece of the whole disk, Servants to the Night. Characterized from a chorus to sing loud, from riff from the melodic flavour best, from plots of guitars complicated but immediate, will be surely a time bomb in the exhibitions live: a masterpiece.

It is not from except for Fallen winds of hopeless Greed, swift and rapid, but from the introspective and dark melody. The track contains one of the solos more involving of the work, signal that rewarded it firm Malone/Knight you work rather. They follow Overthrown, Progressive Entrapment and Feast for to Liars Tongue. Three good tracks, between excellent ideas and other except for original. From it signal the first one, more precisely the destructive refrain, accompanied from a really original riff and wisely built. The other two pieces follow to large lines the coordinated traced from the previous tracks, without add especially original ideas to what already was shown.

Closing entrusted at two attractive tracks. The first one takes the name of My Oath to Madness, with a riff-branch between the better of the work, the second, Failure Conquest, it is opened in quiet manner to continue with a monolithic one to advance. Excellent track, especially for the alternation between parts more cadenced and more supported rhythms. Useless to underline the best I work I turn from the solo guitar, true and actual protagonist of the work. This We are the Nightmare should be listened to from whoever loves the type, to ignore from the preference. It want power? want melody? want technical? Here, here you will find all, but actual everything to enjoy. Compliments to this large band.

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The worst part is, it really looks like the guy made an effort. But holy crap, THE ENGRISH! I couldn't stop laughing while reading it.

For Metallica's Load.


Give me my money back! - 0%
Written by Maniac456 on April 28th, 2008

I don�t know what�s going on with this band after the black album. In the black album all was "perfect" to give many shows around the world always with success. Showing to all the world what the heavy metal can create. After many year in silence, after the black album, the expectation was enormous, but result was catastrophically insane, searching just the money.
Metallica, has been facing many difficult circumstances (Cliff) and alcoholism (James) and most of all - the Obstinate behavior from the drum player- Yes Lars!!!.
I understood in first instance that they wanted to show a new look, with horrible clothes and hair style. But let me focus in the most important, the music. Well the music, the concept, even the art in the cover was extremely horrible, out from the Metallica concept what everyone was familiarized. The effect in the guitars total a disaster, the sound heavy with power is gone, the fast riffs are gone, the power in the lyrics is gone, the concept of energy is gone, the old logo is gone, the long hair is gone, art in the cover is gone, angry voice is gone, I just can think one thing and is to give 0 points to this album. I listened the entire album three bored times and was enough, however I have been listening through years thousands of times their first three albums (Kill'em all, Ride the lightning and Master of Puppets) and sometimes the ...And Justice For all, but definitively this album is worst than the black album.
Now with this last production, there's a complete different band in spite that the musicians are the same. Metallica R.I.P.