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Five_Nails
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Dec 14, 2007 1:34 pm
Posts: 622
PostPosted: Thu Mar 19, 2020 8:57 pm 
 

Just watch out, he might fling a bike lock at you. Luckily, we have the technology to find him: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=muoR8Td44UE

This conversation has become:
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hells_unicorn
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 8:32 pm
Posts: 2463
Location: United States
PostPosted: Thu Mar 19, 2020 9:12 pm 
 

Five_Nails wrote:
Just watch out, he might fling a bike lock at you. Luckily, we have the technology to find him: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=muoR8Td44UE

This conversation has become:


lol Looks like a Tourette Syndrome convention with way too many MAGA hats having a conversion experience with a minister from The Assemblies of God doing the evangelizing. I'd wear a helmet if I ever had a run in with pizza boy, but he'd probably accuse me of being ableist. :lol:
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Five_Nails
Metalhead

Joined: Fri Dec 14, 2007 1:34 pm
Posts: 622
PostPosted: Thu Mar 19, 2020 9:15 pm 
 

hells_unicorn wrote:
Five_Nails wrote:
Just watch out, he might fling a bike lock at you. Luckily, we have the technology to find him: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=muoR8Td44UE

This conversation has become:


lol Looks like a Tourette Syndrome convention with way too many MAGA hats having a conversion experience with a minister from The Assemblies of God doing the evangelizing. I'd wear a helmet if I ever had a run in with pizza boy, but he'd probably accuse me of being ableist. :lol:


This is one of my absolute favorites of the last election cycle. I hope we more get gold like this coming to us after this corona stuff blows over.

You best be sure to mind that ableism and check your helmetless privilege, hells_unicorn. :wanker: Partisans can't help being retarded.
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Derigin
The Mountain Man

Joined: Sun Jan 01, 2006 6:25 am
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Location: Canada
PostPosted: Thu Mar 19, 2020 9:21 pm 
 

I'll take a look at the reviews brought up here shortly. In the meantime, no need to keep hounding on this, it has our attention. Please keep this thread on topic. Thank you.
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hells_unicorn
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 8:32 pm
Posts: 2463
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Mar 27, 2020 8:32 pm 
 

Borderline on content (mostly bitching about repetition, doesn't get terribly specific apart from a few gripes about the lyrics) and a massive eyesore quote of the chorus of one of the songs right in the middle, completely screws up the format. I'd recommend contacting the guy just to tell him to cut out the lyric quote to make it a just barely 3-pointer review, but apparently this dude was Dursted years ago.

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... Son/256401
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Kerpak
Metal newbie

Joined: Thu Aug 23, 2007 12:48 am
Posts: 201
PostPosted: Sun Apr 12, 2020 1:19 pm 
 

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... uel/132884

Extremely short and lacking in content. The review is based on a false premise (the album sounds nothing like Dragonforce no matter how badly it upsets that person). This review is just a short ramble more than a review. Also, bitching about racism while showing clear homophobia (because it's from 2009 and it was still cool). I don't give a crap about either of those not any more or less than I do about lyrics on murder or prostitution or rape but it just adds to the lazy shittyness of this review.

He proceeds to repeat the Dragonforce thing five more times (literally). I understand if that was used as a hyperbole once but the title has it, and the review body mentions Dragonforce seven times.

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Derigin
The Mountain Man

Joined: Sun Jan 01, 2006 6:25 am
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PostPosted: Sun Apr 12, 2020 1:40 pm 
 

Yeeeah, that is a piece of shit review. Tossed.
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Kerpak
Metal newbie

Joined: Thu Aug 23, 2007 12:48 am
Posts: 201
PostPosted: Sun Apr 12, 2020 6:01 pm 
 

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... egius/1353

There's this one too on the same band. It's from 2003 and way too short. However, there's only 2 reviews for that album so maybe it's okay to leave it. I might give that album a review, if my other reviews get approved.

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Derigin
The Mountain Man

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 12, 2020 8:33 pm 
 

I ended up removing it. Not because of its shortness. A review can be short, but still sufficiently describe the music of the album. But this review was slim on that, and also full of numerous spelling/grammar errors.
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ReleaseTheBears
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Fri Oct 28, 2016 4:09 pm
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Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Apr 13, 2020 4:11 am 
 

Hi guys, this is my first post on this thread so apologies if I end up flailing a little bit with formatting/links etc.

I recently read Noctir's review for Among the Living and found his statements towards Native Americans to be rather racist. I'd like to think that it was somehow a joke, but I'm not sure how advocating that thrash fans who care about Native Americans should be rounded up and exterminated as well is anything but casual racism. If it's a joke, it fails to come off as such to me. Here's the quote:

"The themes are quite stupid, at times, such as "Caught in a Mosh" and "Indians". Thrash fans do not care about the plight of Native Americans and, if they do, they need to be rounded up and exterminated as well."

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Anthrax/Among_the_Living/1838/Noctir/123274

I suppose if the "as well" was removed it might come off as a joke, rather than a racist remark. Other than those two sentences, I don't think there's anything massively wrong with this review, so perhaps it just needs to be edited?

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Timeghoul
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Jul 12, 2017 2:00 pm
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Location: Hello from the gutter
PostPosted: Mon Apr 13, 2020 11:13 am 
 

The first one for this Melvins albums uses the "F" word multiple times

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Melvins/Stoner_Witch/11714/
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gasmask_colostomy
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PostPosted: Mon Apr 13, 2020 11:34 am 
 

I think the general position of this website has mostly been not to police content, apart from where the necessary content is missing. Therefore:
1. No one cares about the use of the "F" word.
2. We will think of Noctir as a dick and move on.
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Derigin
The Mountain Man

Joined: Sun Jan 01, 2006 6:25 am
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PostPosted: Mon Apr 13, 2020 11:49 am 
 

To an extent. We won't police your opinions or your content about the music, so long as it's genuine. But there's a limit with blatantly bigoted statements like that one.

If people want to submit reviews with casual racism thrown in them, they can do it elsewhere.
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Sweetie
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Joined: Tue Dec 16, 2014 1:19 am
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PostPosted: Mon Apr 13, 2020 12:48 pm 
 

ReleaseTheBears wrote:
"The themes are quite stupid, at times, such as "Caught in a Mosh" and "Indians". Thrash fans do not care about the plight of Native Americans and, if they do, they need to be rounded up and exterminated as well."


Damn! How the hell did THAT even get through?! One of the worst takes I've ever heard. ESPECIALLY considering how multicultural thrash metal is.
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Kerpak
Metal newbie

Joined: Thu Aug 23, 2007 12:48 am
Posts: 201
PostPosted: Mon Apr 13, 2020 5:39 pm 
 

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... los/118512

This seems too short and undetailed. There's one paragraph about the music and it mostly goes like "X song bad, Y song good". His other reviews are short but not this lacking in detail.

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OzzyApu
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PostPosted: Thu Apr 16, 2020 12:05 pm 
 

This Artificial Brain review is super short (and extremely vague). Doesn't do a good job of describing the album at all. Says more about the genre of technical death metal, but maybe 1 or 2 sentences about the album. It's FullMetalAttorney. The guy made a name for himself here with his bland reviews.

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... ney/240636

Quote:
Normally I ignore technical death metal. But that has nothing to do with the essence of the genre itself. Sadly, the majority of it is all showing off and lots of polish. Emphasis on the "technical," not the "death metal."

That hasn't always been the case. If you go back to the genre's roots, there was real songwriting and real ugliness. Notably, there were Cynic and Demilich, the former exemplifying the art of the song and the latter being as ugly as a demon from a Bosch painting. Artificial Brain channels that spirit of technical death metal in a manner that makes the shorthand "tech-death" feel, somehow, wrong.

You've already got the general idea. This is death metal, true to the name, with guttural vocals and a twisted sound. And it's also technical. The riffs sound like they're not too easy to play--hey, ask a musician to be sure--and they're changing all the time. The "technical" and the "death" serve each other well.

And while it does harken back to the spirit of a bygone era, this is not a part of the "old-school" death metal trend. The guitars make extensive use of relatively clean dissonant chords in a clearly contemporary manner.

This is technical death metal the way it's meant to be.

originally written for http://fullmetalattorney.blogspot.com/
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Metantoine
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Joined: Sat Jun 21, 2008 5:00 pm
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PostPosted: Thu Apr 16, 2020 12:25 pm 
 

OzzyApu wrote:
This Artificial Brain review is super short (and extremely vague). Doesn't do a good job of describing the album at all. Says more about the genre of technical death metal, but maybe 1 or 2 sentences about the album. It's FullMetalAttorney. The guy made a name for himself here with his bland reviews.

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... ney/240636

Quote:
Normally I ignore technical death metal. But that has nothing to do with the essence of the genre itself. Sadly, the majority of it is all showing off and lots of polish. Emphasis on the "technical," not the "death metal."

That hasn't always been the case. If you go back to the genre's roots, there was real songwriting and real ugliness. Notably, there were Cynic and Demilich, the former exemplifying the art of the song and the latter being as ugly as a demon from a Bosch painting. Artificial Brain channels that spirit of technical death metal in a manner that makes the shorthand "tech-death" feel, somehow, wrong.

You've already got the general idea. This is death metal, true to the name, with guttural vocals and a twisted sound. And it's also technical. The riffs sound like they're not too easy to play--hey, ask a musician to be sure--and they're changing all the time. The "technical" and the "death" serve each other well.

And while it does harken back to the spirit of a bygone era, this is not a part of the "old-school" death metal trend. The guitars make extensive use of relatively clean dissonant chords in a clearly contemporary manner.

This is technical death metal the way it's meant to be.

originally written for http://fullmetalattorney.blogspot.com/

Yeah that's not even close to a 3 pointer... Maybe we should take a closer look at FMA's reviews now. He's always been pretty weak.
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Sweetie
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PostPosted: Tue Apr 21, 2020 10:19 pm 
 

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... Guy/657050

There is literally nothing descriptive in the slightest beyond "it's even worse than X band" "it's bad/horrible/etc" and "his voice is annoying." My personal beef with this horribly wrong opinion aside, I couldn't even come close to knowing what it sounded like based off of these horrible descriptions.
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Nothingface
Metal newbie

Joined: Mon Apr 06, 2020 6:34 pm
Posts: 124
PostPosted: Mon Apr 27, 2020 3:45 am 
 

According to PatientZero, Death - Mutation - Disease - Annihilation by Atomizer is "the most flamboyant, homosexual, weak, poppy, faggot crap" that he has ever heard.

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... ero/145586

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Derigin
The Mountain Man

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Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Apr 27, 2020 6:55 am 
 

Dealt with.
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Morn Of Solace
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Apr 01, 2014 2:19 am
Posts: 1708
PostPosted: Tue Apr 28, 2020 5:06 am 
 

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... octum/9792

Super old track by track

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Subrick
Metal freak

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Location: United States
PostPosted: Sat May 02, 2020 9:51 pm 
 

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... aBoris/147

Extremely old, short review with no real musical description beyond saying it sounds like other bands.

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... sed/136442

This review is pretty much just lying. The musical description is incorrect (psychedelic guitar solos?), and he completely neglects to mention the heavy grooving the album leans on most of the time. He calls it technical, but this is easily the least involved, most simplistic stuff Deicide have ever made. He says it does not sound like a poorly recorded demo when it very clearly does. He says the vocals sound like "a tamer version of Mortician" which is just laughably incorrect. It all just reads like a reaction to the negative attention this album gets.
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Subrick
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PostPosted: Sun May 03, 2020 7:52 pm 
 

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... 4/ad/10170

Crappy old track-by-track loaded with more misspellings and bad grammar than musical description.
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gasmask_colostomy
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PostPosted: Fri May 08, 2020 10:27 am 
 

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... los/388776

This is pretty frickin basic.
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BastardHead
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PostPosted: Fri May 08, 2020 2:59 pm 
 

Pretty basic isn't exactly rejectable though.
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gasmask_colostomy
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PostPosted: Sat May 09, 2020 6:58 am 
 

BastardHead wrote:
Pretty basic isn't exactly rejectable though.

No worries if it's not, I thought it could probably do with a look though.
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ThStealthP
Metalhead

Joined: Sun Jul 14, 2013 3:16 pm
Posts: 607
Location: Dominican Republic
PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2020 2:25 pm 
 

Mmm, I feel that these reviews are deletable:
https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... an86/21281
https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... etal/35516
https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... _Fox/46561

And this could be arguable:
https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... aded/70321

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Derigin
The Mountain Man

Joined: Sun Jan 01, 2006 6:25 am
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PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2020 3:25 pm 
 

All those reviews seem fine.

Keep in mind that our rules on reviews are not particularly strict. So long as a review does a decent job of genuinely describing the music, and focuses on that, we'll accept it. You don't have to be Shakespeare to get your review onto MA. Admittedly some folks hate that we aren't more strict, but it's how we operate.
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droneriot
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PostPosted: Mon May 11, 2020 3:28 pm 
 

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... odox/61869

The rule says talk about the music. The production isn't the music. The production is the production.

All there is about the actual music is that it's melodeath and it already says that on the band page.
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Subrick
Metal freak

Joined: Sun Sep 12, 2010 7:27 pm
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PostPosted: Thu May 14, 2020 12:18 am 
 

https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... ert/101472

There is literally one sentence of the barest musical description possible in here, and it isn't even accurate to the albums preceding Demonic either. The rest is ranting about how Testament should've changed their name if they were gonna make an album that wasn't thrash.
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morbert
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PostPosted: Sat May 16, 2020 12:24 am 
 

Subrick wrote:
https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Testament/Demonic/256/morbert/101472

There is literally one sentence of the barest musical description possible in here, and it isn't even accurate to the albums preceding Demonic either. The rest is ranting about how Testament should've changed their name if they were gonna make an album that wasn't thrash.


Hmm, sounds more like you disagree. Which is fine. But my view on the album still stands.
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Unorthodox
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Joined: Sun Mar 05, 2006 8:08 pm
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PostPosted: Sat May 16, 2020 2:14 am 
 

droneriot wrote:
https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Arghoslent/Incorrigible_Bigotry/10090/Unorthodox/61869

The rule says talk about the music. The production isn't the music. The production is the production.

All there is about the actual music is that it's melodeath and it already says that on the band page.


Production, or more specifically mixing, is a huge part of music. It's the reason why an album like Dimmu Borgir's original release of Stormblast feels and sounds completely different from the newer version. But whatever- if mods don't like it they can take it off, up to them obviously.
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Subrick
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PostPosted: Sat May 16, 2020 11:18 am 
 

morbert wrote:
Subrick wrote:
https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Testament/Demonic/256/morbert/101472

There is literally one sentence of the barest musical description possible in here, and it isn't even accurate to the albums preceding Demonic either. The rest is ranting about how Testament should've changed their name if they were gonna make an album that wasn't thrash.


Hmm, sounds more like you disagree. Which is fine. But my view on the album still stands.


Nope. Demonic sucks as an album. That doesn't change your review not actually being a review of the music and more a rant against Testament having the audacity to release it as Testament.
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droneriot
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PostPosted: Sat May 16, 2020 11:39 am 
 

Production is not in any way a part of music, production is part of the presentation like the artwork. Only music is part of the music. The review can only have been accepted by one of the mods who also seem to think that metal is just a form of guitar tone or a style of audio engineering who's name usually starts with the letter 'B', but anyone who listens to metal as something people play on instruments should see you're not talking about the music at all.
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Unorthodox
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PostPosted: Sat May 16, 2020 11:45 am 
 

Ok well then I guess the change in production values between Soulside Journey and A Blaze in the Northern Sky are totally and completely irrelevant to Darkthrone's sound, because as you say, production is not in any way a part of the music. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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droneriot
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PostPosted: Sat May 16, 2020 11:51 am 
 

Well, try writing a review about A Blaze in the Northern Sky that talks about the production entirely and doesn't mention the music at all and see if people get how the albums are different from one another. That is the issue here, not that you talk about the production, but that you talk only about the production and nothing else. A Blaze is different from Soulside in a dozen ways, most prominently the way the songs are written and the way the guys play their instruments. In the Shadow of the Horns really isn't just Accumulation of Generalization with raw production.
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Unorthodox
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PostPosted: Sat May 16, 2020 12:05 pm 
 

Fenriz said that the album was somewhat "rushed" and that many of the songs have "death metal guitar riffs" played in a "black metal style". You're still separating the production from the music- they're inseparable.
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Derigin
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PostPosted: Sat May 16, 2020 12:13 pm 
 

droneriot wrote:
https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Arghoslent/Incorrigible_Bigotry/10090/Unorthodox/61869

The rule says talk about the music. The production isn't the music. The production is the production.

All there is about the actual music is that it's melodeath and it already says that on the band page.

I agree with Unorthodox that music production is just as much a part of the music as any other component, and I'm fine with this review. Mixing, production, songwriting, instrumentation, vocals... they all form a part of the whole, and trying to argue that one isn't as relevant or important or as valuable as another is just pulling hair. You're still describing the music. That said, normally we do prefer if reviews are holistic pieces; that they cover all or at least most of the components that make up the music of the album. This review isn't solely focused on production, which is its saving grace, and admittedly for an album that already has numerous reviews it's not unreasonable to allow this as another perspective on describing the album's music. Where we do draw the line - firmly - are in those cases where the focus of the review is wholly or significantly discussing non-musical aspects of the album; things like the packaging, lyrical themes, other albums, the genre itself. Those reviews typically need some reining in so that those aspects complement the much needed (and preferred) musical description of the album.

Subrick wrote:
https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/Testament/Demonic/256/morbert/101472

There is literally one sentence of the barest musical description possible in here, and it isn't even accurate to the albums preceding Demonic either. The rest is ranting about how Testament should've changed their name if they were gonna make an album that wasn't thrash.

I agree. Regardless as to whether you or I may feel it's an accurate opinion or not, the review does spend most of its time just ranting about the band itself, and not really describing much about the music of the album. Since morbert is here, I'd strongly urge him to take another look at this review, and maybe elaborate on the musical description more. If anything, take it as constructive feedback that will hopefully flesh out the review more and give it a little bit of tender love and care.
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droneriot
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Joined: Sat Aug 28, 2004 1:17 pm
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PostPosted: Sat May 16, 2020 12:15 pm 
 

You gotta be fucking kidding me. You're trying to fucking misuse Fenriz quotes to say that those two albums are the same music with different production. How about you pick up your instruments then and open your DAW and play A Blaze and give it the production of Soulside Journey and show me how it's completely identical in style to its predecessor.

Fenriz was only referring to two songs by the way that re-used riffs from the Goatlord sessions (the title track and Paragon Belial), you could have heard that if you paid attention to the music.
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Derigin
The Mountain Man

Joined: Sun Jan 01, 2006 6:25 am
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PostPosted: Sat May 16, 2020 12:15 pm 
 

Please move your fight about Darkthrone to PMs, fellas.
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