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androdion
Metal freak

Joined: Thu Sep 28, 2006 10:34 am
Posts: 6214
Location: Portugal
PostPosted: Thu Mar 31, 2016 11:04 pm 
 

There's the other way, which is saying what you want to say and not care for what people think of it. Take Kluseba for instance. His (her?! sorry, don't really know) opinions are what we all know but it's not like there's suddenly a change of heart everytime someone says anything negative about them. The opinion is there, faulty as it is and voiced as poorly as it may be, but it's immutable. And that takes balls, which is something essential to have when you expose yourself in the open.
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hells_unicorn
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 8:32 pm
Posts: 2330
Location: United States
PostPosted: Thu Mar 31, 2016 11:36 pm 
 

Whelp, in about 30 minutes I'm going to figure out whether or not I'm going to be played for a sucker yet again with this business of MA getting rid of all the reviews. My gut is telling me that after the antics of the past several years that this would be the next logical step if the ante is to be upped. The setup for this over the past several weeks is what threw me at first, but knowing the work ethic for all parties at the top in the past for playing pranks, it's not out of character.

Apologies if I've just spoiled the joke, unicorns (especially forsaken ones) are not renowned for their sense of humor. :-P
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Erosion of Humanity
Destroyer of the Gods

Joined: Thu Sep 13, 2012 5:12 pm
Posts: 5703
Location: Chicago
PostPosted: Thu Mar 31, 2016 11:53 pm 
 

Whether it be a joke or not, and I seriously hope it is, I still we're going to see some pretty drastic changes to the whole reviews aspect of the site. And I'm ok with that.
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hells_unicorn
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 8:32 pm
Posts: 2330
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 12:17 am 
 

Erosion of Humanity wrote:
Whether it be a joke or not, and I seriously hope it is, I still we're going to see some pretty drastic changes to the whole reviews aspect of the site. And I'm ok with that.


As long as they don't completely ax all the reviews completely and will still accept submissions, I can live with some changes, even if they are major ones. I completely get that there's been some massive issues with riff-raff clogging up the works and it might be necessary to cap reviews for major bands like Metallica at 10 per release or even less. But more than half of my reason for being here is the reviews, with the content of the encyclopedia part being a somewhat distant second. I'm not terribly active in the forum apart from the reviews section, though that may change once I drop my hopefully soon-to-be-completed debut LP.
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Brainiac00
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Mon Feb 22, 2016 6:16 am
Posts: 1
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 8:31 am 
 

I'm really sad that all the reviews are removed T^T

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hells_unicorn
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 8:32 pm
Posts: 2330
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 1:35 pm 
 

I'm really not trying to be a Debbie Downer here because I know how much everybody here loves a good April Fool's Day joke, but you guys are trying WAY TOO HARD this year. It would have been better to keep the reviews gone for the entire day and then reinstate them at midnight rather than go through this 2-prong approach of first getting rid of them and then turning the whole thing into a free-for-all.
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Empyreal
The Final Frontier

Joined: Thu Nov 30, 2006 6:58 pm
Posts: 26721
Location: Where the dead rule the night
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 1:36 pm 
 

Nah, when it was just about deleting all reviews, it was a lame joke. But now it is hilarious.
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dystopia4
Thumbman

Joined: Mon Nov 16, 2009 6:47 pm
Posts: 4430
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 1:44 pm 
 

hells_unicorn wrote:
I'm really not trying to be a Debbie Downer here because I know how much everybody here loves a good April Fool's Day joke, but you guys are trying WAY TOO HARD this year. It would have been better to keep the reviews gone for the entire day and then reinstate them at midnight rather than go through this 2-prong approach of first getting rid of them and then turning the whole thing into a free-for-all.

Your (or anyone's) jimmies being rustled is proof that the prank was successful.
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Metal_Detector
Reticular Modular Unit

Joined: Fri Oct 08, 2010 9:15 pm
Posts: 2082
Location: Forgotten in space
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 1:50 pm 
 

I wasn't expecting this (unlike the rather obvious initial joke), and it's excellent. Major props.
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Lich Coldheart
Stares into the Void

Joined: Tue Jun 11, 2013 12:44 pm
Posts: 983
Location: Frozen dead land where sharp winds blow
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 1:52 pm 
 

dystopia4 wrote:
Your (or anyone's) jimmies being rustled is proof that the prank was successful.

Not at all. The prank started quite well a week ago but ended unsuccessful. Some of us played along, anyway.
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Zodijackyl
Definitely Proportionate

Joined: Wed Apr 30, 2008 5:39 pm
Posts: 7418
Location: Longmont Potion Castle
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 1:55 pm 
 

The art of the review is dead. To shield it from further criticism in the age of "anything goes" my review of Illud Divinum Insanus has been removed.

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Empyreal
The Final Frontier

Joined: Thu Nov 30, 2006 6:58 pm
Posts: 26721
Location: Where the dead rule the night
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 1:57 pm 
 

Lich Coldheart wrote:
dystopia4 wrote:
Your (or anyone's) jimmies being rustled is proof that the prank was successful.

Not at all. The prank started quite well a week ago but ended unsuccessful. Some of us played along, anyway.


I know for a fact that you totally believed it, so not sure how you're saying it was unsuccessful.
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Lich Coldheart
Stares into the Void

Joined: Tue Jun 11, 2013 12:44 pm
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Location: Frozen dead land where sharp winds blow
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 2:18 pm 
 

Empyreal wrote:
I know for a fact that you totally believed it, so not sure how you're saying it was unsuccessful.

Well, should they feel like making the effort to comment, Felix 1666 and Diamhea might tell you I didn't truly believe it.
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I will pay a dollar to have Lich's custom title changed to "Drools into the Toilet Bowl"
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KalinaF
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Thu Feb 18, 2016 5:46 pm
Posts: 8
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 2:22 pm 
 

I sincerely hope somebody is screenshotting all of this. This beautiful art needs to be preserved.

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Lich Coldheart
Stares into the Void

Joined: Tue Jun 11, 2013 12:44 pm
Posts: 983
Location: Frozen dead land where sharp winds blow
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 2:26 pm 
 

KalinaF wrote:
I sincerely hope somebody is screenshotting all of this. This beautiful art needs to be preserved.

Why don't you do it yourself?
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BastardHead wrote:
I will pay a dollar to have Lich's custom title changed to "Drools into the Toilet Bowl"
Master_Of_Thrash wrote:
I like keeping my sword wet, like a young girl in her prime.

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Zodijackyl
Definitely Proportionate

Joined: Wed Apr 30, 2008 5:39 pm
Posts: 7418
Location: Longmont Potion Castle
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 2:46 pm 
 

It's only a matter of time before spambots manage reviews like this one.
http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/M ... kyl/113957

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Emptiness Cycle
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Apr 13, 2015 11:07 am
Posts: 418
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 2:49 pm 
 

Mark my words, I called it.

http://www.metal-archives.com/albums/Ta ... tar/568913

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Metal_Detector
Reticular Modular Unit

Joined: Fri Oct 08, 2010 9:15 pm
Posts: 2082
Location: Forgotten in space
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 2:57 pm 
 

I love how all of Perdition's "reviews" are just in-jokes for the j-metal weirdo crowd. I wonder if traxan has killed himself from reading that Aldious write-up yet. :P
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Rosenthorn
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Dec 11, 2013 8:51 pm
Posts: 397
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 3:05 pm 
 

I saw the first part coming when they started deleting people's posts about it being an April fool's joke... But nothing could have prepared me for the second part. Well played!
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~Guest 76452
Metal freak

Joined: Mon Jul 31, 2006 8:40 pm
Posts: 4414
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 3:07 pm 
 

Metal_Detector wrote:
I love how all of Perdition's "reviews" are just in-jokes for the j-metal weirdo crowd.

I'm gonna mix in some serious ones for the fuck of it. My writing is terrible, but this is good practice.

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Dudemanguy
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Mar 30, 2010 7:19 pm
Posts: 2448
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 3:18 pm 
 

Oh my god. I didn't see this coming. :lol: And some of Perdition reviews make me crack up. I'm probably going to go around insulting various bands now.
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hells_unicorn
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 8:32 pm
Posts: 2330
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 3:21 pm 
 

dystopia4 wrote:
Your (or anyone's) jimmies being rustled is proof that the prank was successful.


If you want to count boredom as having your jimmies rustled, fair enough. Generally jokes and pranks are successful when they are funny, and this go around it just isn't doing it for me. The Penis Metal gag and the FBI thing were funny, and even the Nickelback one was moderately amusing, this one is just sorta meh.

Try not to be too sensitive and protective about your humor, sometimes even the best comedians hit a dud or two.
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Empyreal
The Final Frontier

Joined: Thu Nov 30, 2006 6:58 pm
Posts: 26721
Location: Where the dead rule the night
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 3:22 pm 
 

It's amazing to me that anyone was fooled by the FBI thing. That was the easiest one to tell it was a joke out of all the ones they did.
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~Guest 76452
Metal freak

Joined: Mon Jul 31, 2006 8:40 pm
Posts: 4414
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 3:24 pm 
 

Dudemanguy wrote:
Oh my god. I didn't see this coming. :lol: And some of Perdition reviews make me crack up. I'm probably going to go around insulting various bands now.
I may spend half my reviews bitching about that scalper. I notice he's not on yahoo auctions anymore, thank god.

In all seriousness, what fucks me with reviewing is "paralysis of analysis". So doing everything by "stream of consciousness" is surprisingly... dunno, therapeutic?

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Metal_Detector
Reticular Modular Unit

Joined: Fri Oct 08, 2010 9:15 pm
Posts: 2082
Location: Forgotten in space
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 3:25 pm 
 

Abigail is so beloved that even joke reviews still sing its praises and give it a 100%. Fitting.
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Dudemanguy
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Mar 30, 2010 7:19 pm
Posts: 2448
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 4:04 pm 
 

Uh oh, I am overtaken by the urge to shitpost reviews everywhere. Hold on tight people.
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Lich Coldheart
Stares into the Void

Joined: Tue Jun 11, 2013 12:44 pm
Posts: 983
Location: Frozen dead land where sharp winds blow
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 4:16 pm 
 

On a more serious note, how are the mods going to quickly remove all the crap that's currently being published in the review section?
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BastardHead wrote:
I will pay a dollar to have Lich's custom title changed to "Drools into the Toilet Bowl"
Master_Of_Thrash wrote:
I like keeping my sword wet, like a young girl in her prime.

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UnholyCrusada
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Mon Aug 12, 2013 10:19 pm
Posts: 27
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 4:17 pm 
 

I think I'm just about spent, but that was very cathartic.

Probably too much work to bother with, but I'd love to see the mods go through and pick the funniest ones to showcase in the "Crappy Diem" thread.

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MutantClannfear
Blank Czech

Joined: Thu May 27, 2010 12:12 am
Posts: 3293
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 4:17 pm 
 

Lich Coldheart wrote:
On a more serious note, how are the mods going to quickly remove all the crap that's currently being published in the review section?

Well, half of these are clearly timeless contributions to the site, like Master of Bubbets, so there might not even be that much that needs to be removed.

EDIT: stahp, this is why we can't have nice things, etc.

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KalinaF
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Thu Feb 18, 2016 5:46 pm
Posts: 8
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 4:21 pm 
 

Lich Coldheart wrote:
KalinaF wrote:
I sincerely hope somebody is screenshotting all of this. This beautiful art needs to be preserved.

Why don't you do it yourself?


I was on my work computer at the time. I'm at home now, so I shall begin the screenshotting

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Wilytank
Not a Flying Toy

Joined: Thu Jul 30, 2009 7:21 am
Posts: 5239
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 4:24 pm 
 

I'm screenshotting my own shit. Judging from what was talked about in the Metal Discussion a month before, this is a statement that needed to be made: http://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/D ... ank/202503
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Dudemanguy
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Mar 30, 2010 7:19 pm
Posts: 2448
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 4:27 pm 
 

Lich Coldheart wrote:
On a more serious note, how are the mods going to quickly remove all the crap that's currently being published in the review section?

I am sure it'll all just auto delete/rollback a day. If anyone wants to write a completely serious review today that they want to stick around, they probably shouldn't be dumb enough to publish it today.
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Smoking_Gnu
Chicago Favorite

Joined: Sat Mar 15, 2008 11:22 pm
Posts: 4566
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 4:29 pm 
 

Lich Coldheart wrote:
On a more serious note, how are the mods going to quickly remove all the crap that's currently being published in the review section?


It's pretty easy in a database to just run a search on every new review for April 1 -> Delete All
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hells_unicorn
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Feb 15, 2005 8:32 pm
Posts: 2330
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 4:36 pm 
 

Smoking_Gnu wrote:
Lich Coldheart wrote:
On a more serious note, how are the mods going to quickly remove all the crap that's currently being published in the review section?


It's pretty easy in a database to just run a search on every new review for April 1 -> Delete All


Only problem with that is that I wrote a serious review right after midnight that made it in before the gag began. It doesn't really matter though, I can just resubmit it.
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Erosion of Humanity
Destroyer of the Gods

Joined: Thu Sep 13, 2012 5:12 pm
Posts: 5703
Location: Chicago
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 4:47 pm 
 

Dude to negative feedback I have rewritten my Bolzer review. They are now IMHO the greatest band ever in existence. Sorry for any of my previous viewpoints guys. It wasn't how I really felt.
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~Guest 76452
Metal freak

Joined: Mon Jul 31, 2006 8:40 pm
Posts: 4414
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 4:49 pm 
 

Hey, maybe someone can do all of Senmuth's albums now.

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Thiestru
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Oct 09, 2008 9:18 am
Posts: 2058
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 6:21 pm 
 

Gotta give props to Napalm_Satan. That's some pretty funny shit you wrote, especially the Mayhem review. :)
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Zodijackyl wrote:
Anything but undying, eternal praise for Awaken the Guardian is completely wrong and a disgrace to you, your band, family, and Facebook friends list.


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Thiestru
Metalhead

Joined: Thu Oct 09, 2008 9:18 am
Posts: 2058
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 6:24 pm 
 

This week has basically been April Fool's Week, with the days prior to today being the setup of the joke (which obviously I fell for), and today being the punchline (which fortunately I realized was the point). One thing I did think about, though, was: what if the moderators and administrators were serious about deleting the review function, and deliberately set the date for doing so as April Fool's Day, just to make everyone think it was a joke. Then, come April 2, everyone comes back and finds the reviews still gone.... That would have been pretty diabolically clever.
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Anything but undying, eternal praise for Awaken the Guardian is completely wrong and a disgrace to you, your band, family, and Facebook friends list.


If you're interested in hearing my music, it can be found here: http://thiestru.bandcamp.com. Wassail.

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Napalm_Satan
Ever-Opening Flower

Joined: Sat Apr 18, 2015 4:27 pm
Posts: 3316
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 6:34 pm 
 

Thiestru wrote:
Gotta give props to Napalm_Satan. That's some pretty funny shit you wrote, especially the Mayhem review. :)


:headbang: thank you! That is one I actually put some thought into, and it shows :lol:

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Dudemanguy
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Mar 30, 2010 7:19 pm
Posts: 2448
PostPosted: Fri Apr 01, 2016 6:36 pm 
 

Oh man, I'm really glad my exams were yesterday. I would have been fucked otherwise. And no Perdition, I have never heard of Guy Mann-Dude before. :lol: What a name.
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