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EzraBlumenfeld
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Oct 24, 2017 12:50 pm
Posts: 370
Location: Land of No Return
PostPosted: Fri Jan 29, 2021 1:45 pm 
 

It happens from time to time. The mods get busy, so the only reviews that pop up are from users who are Scribed. Nothing to worry about.
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BastardHead
Worse than Stalin

Joined: Thu Aug 18, 2005 7:53 pm
Posts: 10159
Location: St. Charles, Illinois
PostPosted: Fri Jan 29, 2021 2:25 pm 
 

A lot of times there's only one mod working the queue, and it's usually Derigin nowadays, who also does tons of other work and has a very busy real life. It gets backed up sometimes but we always catch up. I did a chunk the other day when I had some free time and wound up rejecting or just passing over like 80% of them so sometimes you just get lucky with a good batch and other times it's a bunch of ESL first timers with a lot of grammar problems. C'est la vie and all.
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Sweetie
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Dec 16, 2014 1:19 am
Posts: 966
Location: United States
PostPosted: Fri Jan 29, 2021 2:53 pm 
 

Vulgar Display is easily my favorite Pantera album. I definitely agree with Walk being the weakest song, but even that one I still love, if only because of the solo on it. To me, the Pantera that matters most is everything from I Am The Night - Vulgar Display. Big chunk in the middle of their discog.
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robotiq
Metal newbie

Joined: Wed Oct 03, 2007 6:08 am
Posts: 32
PostPosted: Fri Jan 29, 2021 4:57 pm 
 

colin040 wrote:
Good to see a non-perfect score for Gorement's The Ending Quest. I mean, it's a good album, but pretty far from flawless. Robotic made some fair points in his review, too.


Thanks Colin. That album is clearly not perfect, but has legions of 100% scores. To be honest, those scores motivated me to review it (and to look at Gorement more carefully).

I had long thought that album was kinda average, so I was reading those reviews wondering whether I had missed something. I decided to re-listen to the whole Gorement discography to see if I was wrong. Turns out that I was wrong, that album is much better than I thought. Still, it is nowhere near the best of its type. Good band, they just need some more measured praise.

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CHAIRTHROWER
Methed-burnt rogue babelfish

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 665
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Sat Jan 30, 2021 10:37 am 
 

Yo, D.Fang! Thanks for allowing me to scratch Konquest_The Night Goes On from my eternally long short reviewing short list, as you basically summed up its gist in a nutshell. I was tempted to interject i.e. come up with follow-up review, towards the end - something about the guitar tones' general freshness (not witchfinder) and plump smoothness of the bass - but you managed to pump that primordial info out, at the very end.

Good save! (Although I'd score it 85% minimum, maybe even 90%).

Also liked how Hell's U. wrapped up with scarlet bow the following, in his Trial (SWE) write-up (a Swedish trad metal band which evaded my dragnet thus far, but no longer!):

"While some have been wont to dismiss the revival of old school heavy metal that has been making the rounds for the past decade or so, more discerning minds have rightly noted this phenomenon as being less an attempt at reliving the past so much as recapturing it and bringing it into a present context. Though it is easy to note the influences of such popular leaders and early proponents of this craze like Wolf and Ram, what they do is less an act of paying tribute to the icons of the 80s and more along the lines of writing the songs within the same stylistic template that were never given the chance to be written during the sub-genre’s original heyday..."

Why can't the dismissers see the light, eh?

p.s. What's with the "wont"? Is such a vestigial lexicon remainder from a visit to England, or summat?

p.p.s. Am duly tempted to take up B-Head's Pantera_Vulgar challenge i.e. finally write up sane and/or sensible review in its punched out regards!

(There I go with the hand-forced commitments, again!)
First, though, I think some Merciful Trouble assuaging is in order...

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TheBurningOfSodom
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Jun 27, 2015 9:28 am
Posts: 100
Location: Italy
PostPosted: Sat Jan 30, 2021 12:31 pm 
 

I keep telling to myself that every time I make fun of a new reviewer is gonna be the last one, but...

...if you're out of motivation to get drunk alone at home, read a Pantera review by Anus_Canis and take a shot every time he talks about "kicking ass". Maybe gonna try it this evening.
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Slater922
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Apr 14, 2020 6:24 pm
Posts: 424
PostPosted: Sat Jan 30, 2021 1:31 pm 
 

TheBurningOfSodom wrote:
I keep telling to myself that every time I make fun of a new reviewer is gonna be the last one, but...

...if you're out of motivation to get drunk alone at home, read a Pantera review by Anus_Canis and take a shot every time he talks about "kicking ass". Maybe gonna try it this evening.

Actually, let's not. I wouldn't even make it halfway through without dying from alcohol poisoning :cry:
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TheBurningOfSodom
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Jun 27, 2015 9:28 am
Posts: 100
Location: Italy
PostPosted: Sat Jan 30, 2021 1:56 pm 
 

I'm still (sorta) wondering how will he feel the day he'll eventually discover this thread :lol:
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Slater922
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Apr 14, 2020 6:24 pm
Posts: 424
PostPosted: Sat Jan 30, 2021 2:39 pm 
 

TheBurningOfSodom wrote:
I'm still (sorta) wondering how will he feel the day he'll eventually discover this thread :lol:

I just hope he doesn't find my post on him in the "Reviewers to Avoid" thread.
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TheBurningOfSodom
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Jun 27, 2015 9:28 am
Posts: 100
Location: Italy
PostPosted: Sat Jan 30, 2021 7:36 pm 
 

Slater922 wrote:
I just hope he doesn't find my post on him in the "Reviewers to Avoid" thread.

Uh yeah, totally forgot about that thread lol. Guess he's not gonna have a boost of self-confidence in any case...
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King_of_Arnor
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Oct 10, 2020 12:35 pm
Posts: 52
Location: United Kingdom
PostPosted: Sat Jan 30, 2021 7:39 pm 
 

I fully expect a 100% review of The Blackening from him to come sooner or later.

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Demon Fang
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Mar 12, 2019 9:42 am
Posts: 151
PostPosted: Sat Jan 30, 2021 8:21 pm 
 

CHAIRTHROWER wrote:
Yo, D.Fang! Thanks for allowing me to scratch Konquest_The Night Goes On from my eternally long short reviewing short list, as you basically summed up its gist in a nutshell. I was tempted to interject i.e. come up with follow-up review, towards the end - something about the guitar tones' general freshness (not witchfinder) and plump smoothness of the bass - but you managed to pump that primordial info out, at the very end.

Good save! (Although I'd score it 85% minimum, maybe even 90%).

Cheers man (and also thanks for the other comments!).

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Lord_Of_Diamonds
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Dec 12, 2018 5:23 pm
Posts: 563
Location: Asheville area, NC, US
PostPosted: Sat Jan 30, 2021 9:06 pm 
 

King_of_Arnor wrote:
I fully expect a 100% review of The Blackening from him to come sooner or later.

Or Soulfly's "Primitive".
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TheBurningOfSodom
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Jun 27, 2015 9:28 am
Posts: 100
Location: Italy
PostPosted: Sun Jan 31, 2021 7:47 am 
 

King_of_Arnor wrote:
I fully expect a 100% review of The Blackening from him to come sooner or later.

If he's a Machine Head fan, there's a chance Catharsis will earn its absolute first positive score...
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Sean16
Moody Tabulator of Torn Hymens

Joined: Sat May 07, 2005 11:03 am
Posts: 342
Location: France
PostPosted: Sun Jan 31, 2021 8:43 am 
 

TheBurningOfSodom wrote:
Slater922 wrote:
I just hope he doesn't find my post on him in the "Reviewers to Avoid" thread.

Uh yeah, totally forgot about that thread lol. Guess he's not gonna have a boost of self-confidence in any case...


Well, reviewers taking pride from negative feedback do indeed exist, so who knows :)
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CHAIRTHROWER
Methed-burnt rogue babelfish

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 665
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Sun Jan 31, 2021 9:43 am 
 

Much obliged, D.Fang!

Oh, here, a promising new band (name) yields wackest album cover ever:

https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/S ... don/915855

(We should a caption contest, here!)

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Lane
Metalhead

Joined: Sat Nov 09, 2002 11:54 am
Posts: 477
Location: Finland
PostPosted: Sun Jan 31, 2021 5:58 pm 
 

CHAIRTHROWER wrote:
https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/Stiletto_Silhouette/Abaddon/915855

(We should a caption contest, here!)


Four guys on the dancefloor sharing a though: "Where's that goddamn loo!!??!"

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Slater922
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Apr 14, 2020 6:24 pm
Posts: 424
PostPosted: Sun Jan 31, 2021 9:34 pm 
 

So I just took a look at MadThrashingDeath666's reviews on a band called Hot Zone, and that band is "odd" to say the least...

Also, MadThrashingDeath666 (if you so happen to be reading this), you have some potential to make some great reviews. What other albums do you plan on reviewing in the future?
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CHAIRTHROWER
Methed-burnt rogue babelfish

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 665
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Mon Feb 01, 2021 10:27 am 
 

And now, another new band worthy of John Malkovich:

https://www.metal-archives.com/albums/I ... ren/920510

(Maybe I should start relegating these quirks to the appropriate thread. Is there one? I'll have to look!)

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Slater922
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Apr 14, 2020 6:24 pm
Posts: 424
PostPosted: Mon Feb 01, 2021 3:59 pm 
 

Just read this review. Got me to listen to Karen's metal band. Definitely what I expected from a Karen-themed album.

EDIT: Review was deleted :(

EDIT 2: The review's now back up.
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Sean16
Moody Tabulator of Torn Hymens

Joined: Sat May 07, 2005 11:03 am
Posts: 342
Location: France
PostPosted: Mon Feb 01, 2021 4:08 pm 
 

Band added: 2021-01-31 18:01:49
First review: 2021-02-01 (rating: 0%)

We may well have broken a record here.
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Empyreal
The Final Frontier

Joined: Thu Nov 30, 2006 6:58 pm
Posts: 29045
Location: Where the dead rule the night
PostPosted: Mon Feb 01, 2021 4:13 pm 
 

The Karen thing is such an overdone hack "joke." Ugh.
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TheBurningOfSodom
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Jun 27, 2015 9:28 am
Posts: 100
Location: Italy
PostPosted: Mon Feb 01, 2021 5:38 pm 
 

Sean16 wrote:
Band added: 2021-01-31 18:01:49
First review: 2021-02-01 (rating: 0%)

We may well have broken a record here.

Haha! The review was also hilarious and well written, I can't think of another review so negative that it actually made me check the album. And... yikes.

Also:
Slater922 wrote:
So I just took a look at MadThrashingDeath666's reviews on a band called Hot Zone, and that band is "odd" to say the least...

Also, MadThrashingDeath666 (if you so happen to be reading this), you have some potential to make some great reviews. What other albums do you plan on reviewing in the future?

Second this (both the "peculiar" band and the good writing). But I must admit, this band is gold if compared to the above. Definitely not my best day in terms of "musical discoveries" :lol:
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PlumpHelmetMan
Mallcore Kid

Joined: Tue May 19, 2020 6:22 pm
Posts: 1
PostPosted: Mon Feb 01, 2021 7:46 pm 
 

TheBurningOfSodom wrote:
Sean16 wrote:
Band added: 2021-01-31 18:01:49
First review: 2021-02-01 (rating: 0%)

We may well have broken a record here.

Haha! The review was also hilarious and well written, I can't think of another review so negative that it actually made me check the album. And... yikes.



I'm fairly certain I spent longer writing the review than they did on the music.

And I spent about 40 minutes.

Thanks for the review of the review. :)

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Subrick
Metal Strongman

Joined: Sun Sep 12, 2010 7:27 pm
Posts: 9572
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Feb 01, 2021 10:38 pm 
 

Darn, the review's gone. I'm sad now, as I didn't get to read it.
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Lord_Of_Diamonds
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Dec 12, 2018 5:23 pm
Posts: 563
Location: Asheville area, NC, US
PostPosted: Tue Feb 02, 2021 2:30 pm 
 

It's back. Reminds me of something I'd write when I started out.
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Slater922
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Apr 14, 2020 6:24 pm
Posts: 424
PostPosted: Tue Feb 02, 2021 3:20 pm 
 

Lord_Of_Diamonds wrote:
It's back. Reminds me of something I'd write when I started out.

Good thing I saved the review on the Wayback Machine. I always save my reviews on the Wayback Machine so in case something happens to them or my account, they'll always be there.
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Lord_Of_Diamonds
Metalhead

Joined: Wed Dec 12, 2018 5:23 pm
Posts: 563
Location: Asheville area, NC, US
PostPosted: Tue Feb 02, 2021 8:43 pm 
 

I ended up listening to a song from the album and it's every bit as awful as the review says it is. It sounds like it was recorded with an iPhone, the band can't keep time with each other, and the vocals are basically just a drunk-sounding guy ranting in a not-at-all-harsh voice.
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Spiner202
Metalhead

Joined: Wed May 06, 2009 3:32 pm
Posts: 2244
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Wed Feb 03, 2021 1:20 pm 
 

Shoutout to my boy Chairthrower for reviewing the same album as me (Live Sacrifice by Screamer) and referencing my review several times. Also shoutout for describing the album much more eloquently than I did :lol:

Also, as you wondered in your review, the song No Sleep 'til Hamilton is in fact about our Ontario town. Here's an excerpt from my interview with the band:

Quote:
SFM: One thing I have always wondered about is if the song “No Sleep ‘til Hamilton” was inspired after the Toronto show, as I believe you guys played Hamilton the very next night. Is this correct? If so, what can you tell us about the journey to Hamilton?

HP: yes, yes it was. As most people know touring costs a fuck ton, so we never planned at staying at a hotel that night, but rather crash on friends floor. Then Matt’s (from Alcoholator) phone crashes with the number to where we were supposed to sleep, so we figured “Fine, let’s just sleep in the cars”. Except one of the cars had broken down and was in the repair shop over night, and we couldn’t squeeze nine people in to a five seat Subaru. We tried to get a hostel for the night, but we gave up on that idea after four hours and decided to roam the streets of Toronto instead. Very nice and friendly city by day, not as nice and friendly for four hick country boys in the dead of night. The promotor suggested that we go sleep in a park but we kindly told him to screw off.

The following night in Hamilton we decided sleep in the cars, now that they were both up and running again, but we quickly learned that in Canada you aren’t allowed to sit and sleep behind the steering wheel, even without the keys, if you have had a beer. This resulted in the police forcing us to get a hotel where we got to sleep for two hours before we were off to next town for beer and breakfast. And that’s just life on the road.


Interestingly, the "story" the band's singer tells about Monte Carlo Nights on the live record sounds pretty much the same as this story about No Sleep 'til Hamilton. How often are these guys wandering the streets at night?
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CHAIRTHROWER
Methed-burnt rogue babelfish

Joined: Sun Dec 20, 2015 7:10 pm
Posts: 665
Location: Canada
PostPosted: Fri Feb 05, 2021 11:58 am 
 

I guess it goes to show how, in reality, it's no picnic subsisting through tours in far-off lands, so the band went with the script and turned both "nuits blanches" i.e. sleepless nights into bona fide/high drive (five-alive) fist-pumpers!

Went I saw yours, didn't hesitate to act, as I'd already been strongly considering making it my next review...

Great album, great times...a dude I met and had a beer with in Osoyoos who was from Ham town told me, sardonically as Hell, that when someone got hit by a car there, not only was it hit & run, but the driver would back up, and run them over, again, for good measure, before taking off...

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Slater922
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Apr 14, 2020 6:24 pm
Posts: 424
PostPosted: Sat Feb 06, 2021 8:30 pm 
 

Any other suggestions on some bands I can do for an album review series? I did one with Mortiis and it was fun to look at the different genres and styles he did over the years.
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Metantoine
Slave to Santa

Joined: Sat Jun 21, 2008 5:00 pm
Posts: 11931
Location: Montréal
PostPosted: Sat Feb 06, 2021 10:20 pm 
 

Slater922 wrote:
Any other suggestions on some bands I can do for an album review series? I did one with Mortiis and it was fun to look at the different genres and styles he did over the years.

I do series of reviews about particular scenes (like Baguette Doom, 21 reviews about French doom so far) or just different concepts, like I did one about tapes I had that were virgins on MA. I love it.
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gasmask_colostomy
Metalhead

Joined: Thu May 27, 2010 5:38 am
Posts: 1108
Location: Behind the wall of fire v.2
PostPosted: Sun Feb 07, 2021 12:02 am 
 

Slater922 wrote:
Any other suggestions on some bands I can do for an album review series? I did one with Mortiis and it was fun to look at the different genres and styles he did over the years.

The artists who change a lot over time are always interesting to cover in this way, although you've got to be careful that you're not someone who doesn't like part of the transition. I've already reviewed all the full-lengths of Paradise Lost and My Dying Bride (thinking of rounding out Katatonia with a couple more), but those early '90s doom or death bands that changed could be pretty cool to cover across the whole discography. Depending what you're into, maybe The Gathering, Anathema, Crematory, Tiamat...
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Demon Fang
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Mar 12, 2019 9:42 am
Posts: 151
PostPosted: Sun Feb 07, 2021 9:58 am 
 

Slater922 wrote:
Any other suggestions on some bands I can do for an album review series? I did one with Mortiis and it was fun to look at the different genres and styles he did over the years.

Honestly? Firewind's a band I've been wanting to do a discog coverage for for quite some time, mainly because of the changes over each and every album. Besides that, maybe Amon Amarth? I'd tried with other bands like Malevolent Creation and All That Remains, but the only successful run I had was with Spidrax.

Doomcave's a special exception.

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TheBurningOfSodom
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Jun 27, 2015 9:28 am
Posts: 100
Location: Italy
PostPosted: Sun Feb 07, 2021 2:49 pm 
 

Somebody got any commas to lend? https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... ow/1097464

...uh, I did it again.
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Slater922
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Apr 14, 2020 6:24 pm
Posts: 424
PostPosted: Sun Feb 07, 2021 6:01 pm 
 

TheBurningOfSodom wrote:
Somebody got any commas to lend? https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... ow/1097464

...uh, I did it again.

This review is kinda like mine's, but it feels more broad. It's almost like he's turning in a basic 3rd grade history report.
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Spider_X
Metal newbie

Joined: Tue Jan 31, 2006 1:48 pm
Posts: 174
Location: United States
PostPosted: Mon Feb 08, 2021 2:19 am 
 

TheBurningOfSodom wrote:
Somebody got any commas to lend? https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... ow/1097464

...uh, I did it again.


Wow, haha :D Out of all that, I think there are only 8 commas in there...

On another note, he's def welcome to use some of mine, some of my reviews have more than enough to share, I'm sure.... haha ;)
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TheBurningOfSodom
Metal newbie

Joined: Sat Jun 27, 2015 9:28 am
Posts: 100
Location: Italy
PostPosted: Mon Feb 08, 2021 6:10 am 
 

:lol:

Great writing by Larry6990, as usual. Some really underrated thrash acts and a band called Belushi Speed Ball that's definitely piqued my curiosity :lol:
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DoomMetalAlchemist
Metalhead

Joined: Mon Dec 27, 2010 6:10 am
Posts: 1942
PostPosted: Mon Feb 08, 2021 10:15 am 
 

TheBurningOfSodom wrote:
Somebody got any commas to lend? https://www.metal-archives.com/reviews/ ... ow/1097464

...uh, I did it again.


He seems to have deliberately replaced the usage of commas with parenthetical statements.

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Slater922
Metalhead

Joined: Tue Apr 14, 2020 6:24 pm
Posts: 424
PostPosted: Mon Feb 08, 2021 10:27 am 
 

Just discovered this review from BastardHead. These parts actually cracked me up :lol:

Quote:
AS A COASTER: This seems to be the one thing that this CD is good for. It is wide enough to cover most any size can/bottle of beverage and thick enough to keep the moisture from soaking through. The only downside is that it's rather pricey for it's apparent intended usage. Also, the material and smooth texture allow it to slide around a little bit more than is comfortable, but it keeps the Schitz sweat off of my coffee table, so I endorse Varg's unintended line of coasters.

AS A FRISBEE: This is probably the most fun you can have with the disc, but it's also the most dangerous. If you are playing with a partner that throws it too hard, there is a possibility you could cut your hand or get the CD embedded in your skull. And after the headache and metaphorical embedding it'll give you from listening to it, this is the last thing you want to happen. If you try to avoid this problem by playing fetch with your dog, this is only good for one throw, as your dog's bite will most likely break it.

On a more serious note, "Daudi Baldrs" has kinda grew on me since I reviewed it, while I still don't consider it special, I did like how the album's simple melodies brought in a more laid-back atmosphere compared to the more advanced tunes in "Hliðskjálf".
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