I didn't write these, but someone I know wrote them. Can I get some opinions on these two?

"To Tell You The Truth"

I feel asthough I may puke
Every fucking time I look at you
You make me sick and thats the plain truth
I wanna fuckin' tell you "Get the fuck out dude!"

Piss me off to no end
The bridge you tore we'll never mend
I'm tired of this shit this shit you send
My way is never clear enough to bend

To tell you the truth
I'd like you better
With the loss of all 32
And six feet under
To tell you the truth
I'd like you better
If you fucking people would just
Leave me alone

I try to ignore all of the shit you give me
Hey man you know as well as I do it's not easy
I get torrmented and I plee
That someone else would fucking rescue me

"A Fine Day To Die"

I sit and I think
Of how far one can sink
As my mind slowly burns away
I look to the sky
And think to myself
"Such a fine day to die"
And I let out a sigh

The first one is childish in it's own right. The second one is a bit better but the rhyme scheme makes it feel cliche/childish.

wow this is garbage, tell your buddy to fuck off because losers like him make poetry look bad.

dude, delete these. fast. if Alexi Laiho sees this, he's gonna be pissed that someone writes angsty, lame lyrics better than he does.

but really, these are terrible. i wrote lyrics like that when i was 11 and pissed off at middle school teachers for giving too much homework.

lol. The kid who wrote these has like, 6 or 7 pages of these on his Myspace blog. A hilarious way to kill some time.

That's horrible.
Not to mention he stole a Bathory song title.
And that's not poetry... It's a disgrace.

Tell him to wait for his balls to drop till he tries writing again.

And at the Alexi joke

Here's some more things this person has written.

"Bite The Bullet"

Wake up in the early morning while they are asleep
Then we bury all their fucking bodies in a bullet heat
What we do is what we want you best all watch your back
Because you see my friends you never know you could all be attacked

Freedom is not always free
Things we will never concieve
Freedom is not always free
Things we will never concieve

March long and hard my comrades to the final resting place
Bodies lying on the ground and some with half a face
Life and death cannot be taken seriously here
Kill or be killed you see is a term for the endeared

Freedom is not always free
Things we will never concieve
Freedom is not always free
Things we will never concieve

What you know and what you don't is decieded by the man
Living life and dying, death will do the best he can
Always seems like the end is never quite in sight
Always hope that this last shot will end the final fight

Freedom is not always free
Things we will never concieve
Freedom is not always free
Things you can never defeat

"Dead Inside"

Am I not worthy,
Am I on trial?
Do I really not deserve a life-line?
I feel so hollow,
And I feel ashamed
I feel like everything that's happened's in my face

I can't seem to find
What is right
Can't seem to see
What's on my mind
And I can't seem to feel
Like anything's right
And I feel, oh I feel
So dead inside

I relive moments,
I relive life
I cannot escape my pain
my feelings trapped inside
I need to relax,
I need to feel
Like nothing in this life for me is real

But I can't seem to find
What is right
Can't seem to see
What's on my mind
And I can't seem to feel
Like anything's right
And I feel, oh I feel
So dead inside

If I could relive that moment
And if could never die
I'd be so happy and alive
If I could find the place
Deep inside, I'd feel alright
Yeah I'd feel alright

But I can't seem to find
What is right
Can't seem to see
What's on my mind
And I can't seem to feel
Like anything's right
And I feel, oh I feel
I can't seem to find
What is right
Can't seem to see
What's on my mind
And I can't seem to feel
Like anything's right
And I feel, oh I feel
So dead inside

Hahaha, Holy shit. I went back and reread them after reading this post....totallly fit as CoB lyrics.

"I dont give a flying fuck motherfucker!"

He's ripped off more song titles than Bathory,

Dear lord this kid should be destroyed, what a load of Smith this all is. Does the writer realize how none of this makes sense?

wow lol ok these poems make no sense. I write cheesy lyrics but they aren't necessarily bad. But this is just bad.