@Xlxlx: Trust me, if you saw how many lyrics I wrote about killing/eviscerating people when I was 13 years old, you'd understand why I'm so bored with that subject nowadays. The song this is going to be placed over isn't BDM, anyways, so the lack of misogynistic, violent themes won't be particularly missed. I appreciate the feedback, though. I feel like a problem with my writing is that it can get extremely long-winded if I don't pay close attention while plotting out the lines, so I think I'll practice more on being concise without being too choppy.

Here is 2 short ones. Think of DSBM/Doom/Grind.....

Forsaken

Banished to an eternal pit,the twisting in my mind make's me sick.
You've banned me from your world,I'm barred inside.
Running through darkness,there's no place to hide.
Deeper into the pit I slide,for I am forsaken.
Forced crown of razor's to make me bleed,in darkness where I feed.
Burried in the chasm of my soul,pain & fear for me to know.
Beaten down & chained,ridiculed & shamed.
Torture me every chance you get,for I am forsaken.



Beg

No...I will not go....
I will not follow you down.
Tempt me as you may,
I will not bow down, I will not become your prey.
Pulling, choking, gasping...no.
Your grip, although tight, is now powerless.
Slave, I am not, to your dark power.
You terrify me, but I shalt not cower.
Come...we must go.
Through eons of pain,
Past pillars of pain.
To reach the winged ones, thy Ancient ones.
Come, walk with me, travel streets of gold.
Through all of the torment, the soul was never sold.
Come...to my Kingdom.
No...I am the master of my soul.
Come, child....I am your Father.
No, please...damn you!
I WILL NOT GO!

I guess it has been a while since I checked out/posted in this thread, mainly because too many people post worthless shit, I'm glad those who are at least trying to write something nice are becoming the majority. Anyway here are a couple of things I posted years ago:

Those aren't really the best examples for a compare-contrast, but I found one (written in 2011) that could perhaps better illustrate the similarities:

Gravestone Schemes
Weeping ice shards
Godspeed crushing
Dead bereaving
Mourn existence

We yearn to see their inner selves
To gaze beneath the mask of flesh
We shall provide you your decay
And ease the suffering of life

The curse of meat be stripped away
Haste for the door of netherworld
Inside the loving ghastly beings
Taken in the cold embrace of black

A pale bequest to those who live
Transmutating souls into a void
We have all settled nicely in
Call you to our realm beneath the soil

We rise and maim you in your sleep
Your healing arts are thoroughly stumped
Our psychic tendrils wander on unseen
They flay until your body's torn

'Tis in the cusp of life we want you most
Thy pulsing energy we enjoy best
Your love, your pain, your fears and all you loath
Shall cater to our sombre, frigid thirst

Freezing breath, eventide warm
Curses to burn through the soul
We promise all a grievous harm
To slay you slowly with our hands
Then corpses blown away like sands
Then cadavers blackened as coal

Baffling punishment stretched
Bodies and souls be threshed
Your consciousness be meshed
In spiral beyond flesh

The nexus between atoms
Dispelled and fragmented
Though living and breathing
Sic et non, decomposed

And thus we slowly send you off
In violence, at leisure, soft
Non has seen an end so tender
Than such loving form of murder

My writing has changed noticeably from those days, it's nice to look back and see the inner workings of your mind like that.

EDIT: BURIAL, man that 2nd one is intense, fucking visceral

@Nochielo; first of all, your English is awesome. I mean, seriously, just look at that. Second of all; I'm in love with Succubus Vorare. It's pretty common to take the easy way and write vulgar, cheap lyrics about Satanic rituals, but your classier approach is something I enjoy a lot. You should post here more often, mate!

@BURIAL; I have to concur with Nochielo's assessment. Out of the two pieces that you posted, Beg is the best one. I have to ask though..... What is it about? A few ideas come to mind when reading it, but I can't pinpoint anything.

@MutantClannfear; don't worry mate, always glad to provide feedback!

Coming from you, that means a lot, thank you. I do my best.


Glad you liked it! I'm very proud of that one, probably one of my more enlightened moments. It's not really about Satanism (though I guess it really depends on what each individual would define as "Satanic"), I'd call it an occult and very blasphemous ritual. More specifically, it's about summoning a succubus for the purpose of acquiring something and then falling in love with her (it?) after the task is complete.

Ah, sorry for the confusion then! It's just that summoning rituals tend to scream "Hollywood Satanism" to me, though in the best way possible in your particular case. Think "Come to the Sabbath" and its ilk.

Thanks

Its a little personal and vague on purpose. I would love to hear your ideas.

Well, for the most part, it sounded like someone refusing entrance into heaven, but the "dark power" part doesn't really fit with that. I was a bit reminded of Paradise Lost in that sense. You know, with Satan declining any offers to go back to heaven out of pride and everything.

Its kind of the struggle between the two and the refusal of both in the end.

The rest of your song was decent enough, not really what I generally dig in lyrics, but quite well written. But this part, this part is amazing.

Yes, you fucker.

More lyrics for that brilliantly named album:

Dissolve:

Ringing sounds in silent railways
Covering voices that will go quiet once discovered
When you notice them, they will begin noticing you

''Hiding from matter itself is utterly impossible''
That's what the man smoking cigarette after cigarette is thinking
He stands on the street corner in the rain and watches me

But he's wrong
I had to drown the stray cat in the bathtub
It had cobweb cameras in it's nostrils
He's fucking wrong
She told me we could dissolve
Dissolve into the sun
Abandon ourselves to the stench of light from her sex



Bright Death:

How can you leave me
In this phantasmagoric wide awake fever dream
Your cruelty feeds me
But not this way
Not this way

Suffocate me and make me free
A triumph of clarity through agony
Every inch of skin cries out as the sky gets closer
A bright line shines through the starry darkness
A bright death for all of us

Your passions wrought upon my limbs
Lash upon lash of the purest intent
Silence all
Silence now
Silence

These 2 lines ruin it for me. I think it would be better if the first line was simply "I had to drown the stray" it would leave more to the imagination.

Besides that small complaint I enjoyed both of them.

I actually liked those lines, BURIAL. They feel quite surreal, like the kind of thought process a paranoid schizophrenic would have. As for the lyrics themselves, well..... I don't know, Lex. Maybe I'm a bit spoiled by the other pieces of your authorship which I've seen so far, but these ones feel too minimalistic, which isn't really my kind of thing. Not that they're bad or anything, but I prefer your other stuff.

It's all good. I like to work in a wide variety of styles, and this minimalistic, imagery focused stuff has been getting some mileage lately. It just works best for what me and PhiloFrog are going for.
Don't worry, I'll be sure to work on more complex, extremely hateful stuff just for you, Nico.

Here is another one....


Decaying Thoughts

Once, I remembered it
or perhaps it was a dream?
But all is lost now
Hidden behind a blackened gaze

Unknown voices are calling me
Distorted by distant screams
And still I can feel them
Writhing around deep inside

Giving birth to the dying sun
Blinded by the light
Emerging from this rotted womb
Vomiting what once was her

What once was her...
Once was me...

A song I wrote for Halberd's 2nd album, the first album (soon to be mastered) had lyrics about 20th conflicts but this one will have lyrics about ancient China and Rome. I want this song to be a fast and crushing doom/death number. Necro said I had a fascination about castration, he's perhaps right!

Eunuch-Maker

From the lowest strata of society, willingly they're cut
Alongside prisoners and hostages, they'll serve the realm
The teachers of heirs, the lovers of emperors
Thoroughly risking their life for self advancement
Total castration, the normalization of pain

Eunuch-Maker, his sickle-shaped knife will slice
Eunuch-Maker, the smell of hot pepper in the air

Laying on the kang, questioned by the maker
Arms bound by strings, crotch exposed
Hacked!
Urethra plugged, awaiting the prognosis
A painful death or a life without a manhood

Protectors of the harem, erotic servitor of the elite
Messenger of the empress, political opportunists
Hand in hand with the women, they rise
Greed is their motivation, power is their goal

Eunuch-Maker, his sickle-shaped knife will slice
Eunuch-Maker, the imperial palace's staff provider!

Wudi's favourite concubine, an eunuch favoured by the Han
Deceiver of the Son of Heaven, executed for treason
Shameful deformity of the body, no rights given
Bane of princes, Lou Lan's rightful son was unmanned

Prestigious in the court, favoured in bed
Phallus less beings of treachery
Huanguan, the seclusion of the emperor gave them influence
Voluntary castration, the purveyor of careers

Eunuch-Maker, his sickle-shaped knife will slice
Eunuch-Maker, inhuman deception of the body
Eunuch-maker, king-maker!

Genitalia kept in a jar, pickled
The necessary proof to advance in rank
So near but severed till their death
Buried with it in complete parasitical symbiosis

"Castration Fascination" would be a cool song title

Now, in all seriousness, those are nice, Tony. Lyrics about castration aren't exactly the most intelligent around, but the historical background makes these ones work. One little detail though; shouldn't "phallus less" be written as "phallusless"?

This are the lyrics for one of our next songs. The musical style is simmilar to Slayer or Coroner. Hope the english is not broken, it is not my first language, so any suggestions are accepted.
I

Forget my face
Forget your life
Since you’ll forever sleep.

Dead!
He seems
But he can see!

The witches
Burning under the moon.
Drowning under the sea.
They would never break free
They were under our curse.

Screams of pain!
Filli the air,
Nothing will never
Be the same.

II
Wake up!

Suicidal again
Only a husk
Of the man
You used to be.
Of the man
You wished to be.

No one will get you out.
No one will rescue you.

You will be trapped
You will die inside
This cell.
You won’t see the sun again.



III
Kill!
Something is driving
You to kill.
Kill!
For the ancient times.
For the time in which you
Were free.

Violence!
Caused by the
Voices inside your head.

Screams of death
Fill your brain.

Rape!
The innocent
Since they won’t suffer
What you have suffered
Through your life.

Try Again!
Kill Again!
You will lose
Nothing but you soul.

Who’s real?
Who’s false?
Are you an empty husk?

Suicidal again
Only a husk
Of the man
You used to be.
Of the man
You wished to be.

You promised
To awake
You promised
That it would be the same.

IV



Death!
Is calling home
Death!
Is calling for you.

To put an end
To your misery
To your suffering.

Die!
You won’t experience more pain.
Die!
You will sigh no more.

Call an end
To pain
And frustration
To this evil nation.

Say goodbye
To those
Who could not quite understand.

Who would attack
Who would
Destroy and kill.

I'm still not too sure about what style to set this against, though I was listening to Ulcerate while I wrote this...

The Dying Sky

Burning on the inside
The world consumed
The skies aflame
There is only fire to behold

The earth has been scorched
Black lands stretch for miles
Charred skies hang over all

Everything is fire

Inside the body of the sun
An eternal inferno burns
The nuclear conflagration
From which our planet was nourished
The giver of life

The one who took it away

One last glimpse of the sky
Rivers of fire floating far above
Writhing like a mass of snakes
The last thing before the sun swallowed the earth

So, I agreed to help a friend with some metalcore/deathcore stuff she was doing but needed vocals/lyrics to. Not quite my style, but I thought the experience of recording and writing lyrics would do me good. The following example is a first scratch to her most death metal song, and might look quite arrythmic, but it fits quite nicely in context with the song. I'm the least satisfied with the last line though, lacks the punch that I envision for it.

Heres one Im working on. Not sure if its finished yet.....


Mortuus Animus


Their shadows, sick, slithering and serpentine
Like jagged tentacles raping my mind
Black dead and descending the depths of my soul
They have come to drown me in darkness

Hollow blank and dead eyes piercing the mirror
My own reflection staring back at me
I can feel him crawling under the skin
Lurking deep within the chasm of my soul

His faith flesh and fiendish fire
Shall purge me of these unholy thoughts
And I give my trust to the Lord
To baptize my soul in the rivers of Hell

Mortuus profundis tenebris descendentem
Labebantur infirmos serpentipedi umbras
Quam pulchri visiones Dómine
Ora dimisero eos

Dead dark descending depths
Slithering sick serpentine shadows

Visions O Lord How Beautiful
Pray them away

And I give my soul unto the Lord
To bathe me in a river of fire

Visions O Lord How Beautiful
Pray them away

^ WOW! I'm really impressed! Great piece of work, you!

Kind of reminds me of Mortuus-era Marduk, good stuff

I thought this would be the best time as any to post the lyrics to the song I submitted for the challenge, which I'll be releasing on a demo in the considerable future:

I

Again awoken, only longing for slumber once more,
Dragged from my dreamless sleep; flooded by the glaring dawn,
And left to writhe, in this woollen tomb,
Instilled with the dread of facing this bitter day anew.

And in drowsing inebriety, staggered the weeping halls,
'Til I met again that half-hinged frame.
Admitted myself into those lifeless walls,
And sat perched beside her, where she lay:

Swathed, rigid, in tender torpor,
Her skin ardent from the pouring light,
And flushed cheeks awash with warmth;
Lids that creep over eyes, so full of life.

Alone, I'd watched her wither,
As hours leadened to days,
And in the coming blackness,
I could but adhere dismayed.

Yet unrequited, I remained,
Mumbling fettered prayers that she would wake again,
And as those who came before I waned,
In the vain pursuits of godless men.

My eyes welled from the ache;
Whilst trembling, sank to my knees,
Cradled her body in my arms,
And sobbed "wake up, wake up, please".

A few songs I wrote a few years ago when I was still in high school and never bothered to share with anyone:

Life Is Pain
Life in pain or no life which is better?
Life in pain? We cannot run forever
Crime is now the ruler of the peasant
Taught a lesson for repetition

Lies - now, forever
Freedom ends when they've taken away all your rights
To live without fear

So run away
For now it's all you can do
But wherever you go
It's awaiting for you

So now they have to silence
Take it out with violence
A parasite named man
Existence sucks life away

My grave is a dumpster
To money a slave
So I lie freezing
Awake in my grave

God, where are you now?

Another perfect plan - cover up your cuts
Can you?

Now something else to fear
Start running the end is near
Warning - fear the unknown

Warning
It's in your blood
Dying
It's in your blood
Suffering
It's in your blood
Death

Waring
It's in your blood
Warning
It's in your blood
Warning
Alone...

Cascading Blood
A Shark in a sea of minnows
Those who swim against the current are swallowed
Her lips were wet with venom *
As she sliced into flesh

You will be remembered
By a crimson flood
Leave life hanging by a thread
The plight of humanity covered in blood

The eagle's talons
Swoop down to claim another victim
Only in this bitter age
We pray for isolation

As the blood of man
Comes cascading down
Why have you forsaken us?

As the blood of humanity drains
Where did you go?

To The Sky
Sin, sin, sin - It's all in your eyes
Look up before the morning dies
Forsaken and gone we're breathing for air
Look up to the sky but god isn't there

Comes undone, we're living to die
Once again, look up to the sky
Your saviour ain't coming, no surprise
The prophecy is a lie

Close your eyes the devil is coming (x3)
Ready to die - the devil comes tonight



*Yeah, that's an homage to Sunn O))) and Boris, so not completely plagiarism

Godspeed to godlessness
Newly deceased
A shade to be
Your pain in life
You'll carry eternally

Bones smashed to dust
Cyclic resurrection
Sick miracle

Reflection of mankind
Collective of the damned
Stygian slums
The dwellings of earth's scum

Masturbatory
Death wishers

Every tree a hangmans plea

Marauders of the void
Cavalry of corpse gray horses
Flesh bound flags raised high
We've come to feed

A race of traitors and swine
Baptized in shit, liars and charlatans

^ Awesome!!

Eden's Fire

She's an angel
But flames inside
Fool I fell
I know what she hides
Levels above
Still going under
For this love
I do surrender

I see blue eyes
Beauty of pearly gates
Inside those skies
Which had changed my fate
She has shadows within
Charming angel of death
I'm falling for her sin
Losing my every breathe

(Chorus)----

There's a hell in her heaven
That I started to understand
There's a hell in her heaven
She Holds the apple in her hand
--------------

Sacrificed to her goddess
With blind in my eyes
I have felt her darkness
And the charming disguise
Fruit colored in golden
Dubbed as a mortal
Treated like a heathen
With a smile of trouble

Blue colored in her red
Beauty was the spell
A reason that I am dead
In hands, my own will
She has it all from me
The heart and the soul
And eyes started to see
Feeble always my role

Betrayed by an angel
Betrayed by her love
Betrayed by a devil
Coming from above
She is one in the same
And I fell forever in the game
Heaven shall burn
The fool in me
Forever shall return

I AM A FOOL
FOR AN ANGEL
THAT KILLED ME NOW
AND FOREVER

(Guitar Solo 1)

I followed the halo on her head
And it was thing that struck me dead
Followed her into the light
But she shown me the way of night

Manipulator
I should have known
Devourer
Coming from my soul
Destroyer
Soon I will be gone
Annihilator
Forever I shall fall

Inside this heaven
And the hell
I shall forever
FALL

(Guitar Solo 2)

Her heaven does burn
Freedom cannot turn
Over that is for me
I SHALL NEVER BE FREE

HEAVEN BURNS INSIDE

(Chorus)----

There's a hell in her heaven
That I started to understand
There's a hell in her heaven
She holds the apple in her hand
There's a hell in her heaven
Darkness of my loving Eve
There's a hell in her heaven
For eternity she shall deceive
A FOOL LIKE I AM
I SHALL FOREVER BELIEVE
IT'S HELL IN HER HEAVEN
YEAH!!!
--------------

(Outro Guitar Solo)

Makes me puke, but you'll probably hit on some girl with that.

sorry if I broke the rules but that one was funny

Call Of Valor

Respect you won't have
look at all the shit that you do
Your way of life makes me nauseous
I think I'll puke
Mjolnir shouts and he calls the clouds
lightning rumbles loud
Bring the maelstrom let the chaos come
also bring the droughts

What I've seen
make my eyes bleed
What I know
I can't show

Hear the loud call of valor x2

Always find a way
to make a lame excuse
Shame on yourself
your prestiege is hanging loose
Let the ragnarok rage, to end a new age
end the filth of these days
Wolf your only friend, so the world weakens
dirt remains the same

What I've seen
make my eyes bleed
What I know
I can't show

Hear the loud call of valor x4

You're not worth it
-solo-

Dont speak just hear the
voices calling you names
Paying for your acts
you're suffering a sanity maim
Tree of life in flames, you're the one to blame
life now is slain
Make new life in earth, to begin a new curse
to end it all again

What I've seen
make my eyes bleed
What I know
I can't show

Hear the loud call of valor x4

nice lyrics.

those lyrics are excellent. I can see the ridiculous fog machine'd 80s video. I refuse those lyrics under any other form than hair metal.

Here's a few that I'm writing for my rejuvenated grind band (tentatively called Horse Choker)

"Fancy"

Exhausted by sex and needles.
This room's never warm.
Her ribs sinking with her chest.
She feels me inside.
She hates my eyes.
She hates my hands.
She hates my mouth.
I fancy her smile.

"Case Worker"

I love her as she walks with
soft clicking heels on pavement
exiting the clinic.
Heinous shades and empty wombs
trail her scent.
Every day from my kitchen, smoking
I see her walk this route.
She kicks a dead bird on the sidewalk.
She cries as she looks up.
I duck under my window
and crawl across the floor.
She can never know.

"Teething"

I used to leave tiny bite marks on your chest,
thin lips bitter with blood, sweet with semen.
Mom would watch.
I've grown accustom to your faith.
Your presence.
I've grown fond of your fondness for pain.
Why did you ever stop?
Was it my chest?
I'm sorry. I'm still the same.
Tell me I'm sweet,
As I grind slat and glass into your skin.
Tell me I'm pretty.
The same way you told me when I was six.
Tell me I'm all you need
as I'm fucking you.
Sucking severed skin, sloppily slashed.
Tongue wrapped around your eyeballs,
each one a pleasant pop.
Tell me it's still a secret.
I'm still sweet daddy,
I've never left.

While minimalism isn't really my thing, I gotta say Frog, those were really..... Uh, effective. Teething, in particular, gave me the creeps. Probably the mix of sexual and violent imagery, plus the subtlety. Sure, it's not like your lyrics lack a certain level of blatancy, but the mood they invoke is hazy and subdued enough to get the serial molester vibes across. Bravo.

"You sound like a serial molester" used as a compliment. Only on MA.

Ah man, thanks! you nailed it. I wanted violence and sex, and to be fucking BLATANT with it...but have this haze of memory and distance to it.

True that Should be careful. I don't want my IP to end up as part of a watch list by accident

@Froggo: you're welcome, mate Just calling 'em as I see 'em.